mad Page 48 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Man Achieves Adequacy
On April 1, in the Year of Our Lord 2016, a man finally achieved adequacy. We gave him a trophy, and surprise-interviewed him about this historic achievement. ...
NCAA Escapes Upsetting Crucial Auntie Fan Base By Keeping Luther Vandross-Sung Theme Song
In an embarrassing lack of judgement, Turner Broadcasting announced it’d be replacing Luther Vandross’ iconic version of “One Shining Moment” as their NCAA theme song last week. But once the all important Auntie and smooth R&B contingent weighed in, TBS realized their grave mistake....
Man Smashes Pads
A man smashed some pads last night, or— as is apparently another way to say this—“blasted some mitts.” ...
Mirotic, Mirotic, Put Your Hands All Over My Body
WMBC’s evening news presented some highlights of last week’s Knicks-Bulls game, and anchor Mark Fontes of the New York City-area independent station struggled a bit with a certain unfamiliar Montenegrin pro basketballer’s name....
Put These Shameful Conference Commissioners Right In The Toilet
You would hope that if someone were to make an argument against paying college athletes in the year of our Lord 2016, that this someone would dig up with a few ideas that were at least slightly less mendacious, self-serving, and paternalistic than the ones that originally founded the amateurism scam...
Just Roy Williams Saying "Doggone," "Daggum," And "Frickin'" A Bunch Of Times
I’ve gotten a good deal of enjoyment out of this video, created by the News & Observer, in which UNC head coach Roy Williams spends 68 seconds saying old-timey grandpa curses: ...
A First-Person View Of A Cristiano Ronaldo Penalty Kick To The Face
Sarah Arcand had damned good seats for last week’s Real Madrid 4-0 win over Sevilla. A little too good. When Ronaldo sailed a penalty kick high, she managed to get her camera out of the way, but not her face....
V.J. Beachem Snatched Some Souls
Notre Dame-UNC is showing Philadelphia what real basketball looks like, and V.J. Beachem brought the thunder (while inducing a case of the vapors in teammate Zach Auguste)....
Tyler Lydon Hits Shoeless Three-Pointer
Who throws a shoe? The Syracuse Orange, who dispensed with footwear late in the first half against Virginia when freshman Tyler Lydon got tied up, later shooting—and making—a somewhat crooked three-pointer....
In Praise Of Chantel Osahor's Set-Shot Threes
The Washington Huskies upset the Stanford Cardinal 85-76 this afternoon to book the first ticket to the Final Four in Indianpolis. Chantel Osahor had a career-high 24 points (including three threes) and 18 rebounds to help the Huskies win. Osahor is a six-foot-two forward who’s in the top 15 nationa...
Buddy Hield Is As Fun As College Basketball Gets
The wildest aspect of the NCAA Tournament is its proclivity for upsets. Unless you have an allegiance to Michigan State, West Virginia, or Cal, or you really care about the health of your bracket, those teams all losing to lower seeds was the most thrilling part of the opening weekend. Chaos is the ...
Screencap Classix: March 26, 2010
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Coach K Apologizes For Lecturing Dillon Brooks And Lying About It
The Oregon Ducks dispatched Duke in the Sweet Sixteen on Thursday, 82-68. Oregon’s last points came off a Dillon Brooks three, which he hit as the shot clock expired with eight seconds left in the game. He celebrated a little, because his team had just beaten Duke, but a bit of silly controversy bro...
Madison Bumgarner And Jason Heyward's Beef Wasn't Really A Beef At All
Madison Bumgarner’s on-mound demeanor could be described using many different words; I’ll go with “cantankerous,” but depending upon your perspective anything from “fired-up” to “dickish” can be appropriate. So when Jason Heyward stood around seemingly staring at Bumgarner after taking a called thir...
This Is One Dumb Technical Foul
Refs blew it twice in one play tonight as Maryland’s Jake Layman wasn’t whistled for a double dribble on his first-half dunk against Kansas, but earned a technical foul for hanging on the rim. There’s a good reason Layman didn’t immediately let go after the straight-on two-handed dunk, and the techn...
The Best Places To Urinate Outside, Ranked
Before we get deep into the bowels of the Funbag, one quick note: I’m out next week on Spring Break with my kids. This will not be like your Spring Break. Your Spring Break will be in Lake Havasu surrounded by fruity drinks and horny twentysomethings. I, on the other hand, will be stuck in Virginia ...
UNI Blows A 12-Point Lead: The Supercut
We’re still all trying to figure out how UNI blew a 12-point lead in 44 seconds, but in the meantime here’s the entire sequence compressed into less than a minute of painful, painful video. (Unless you’re an Aggies fan, that is, or one of those insufferable people who cheer for “the SEC.”)...
The Greatest Comeback In The History Of College Hoops Is Still Unthinkable
“I wish I could get some time back,” said Northern Iowa’s Paul Jesperson, but the problem for the Panthers wasn’t really that there was not enough time, was it? Up 12 points on Texas A&M, 44 seconds remaining, a Sweet 16 berth within view, just about every metric and every win probability calculator...