mad Page 59 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
How Real Are These Rumors About Gareth Bale To Manchester United?
The January transfer window is almost here, which means the rumor mill is just starting to rev up into the senseless, self-serving, outlandish, and dangerously addicting clusterfuck we've come to expect. And while some of the rumors can already be written off fairly easily—Barcelona to sell Busque...
Cristiano Ronaldo Statue Features A Big Ol' Bulging Dick
Cristiano Ronaldo is, quite deservedly, an icon in his hometown of Funchal, Madeira, Portugal—so much so that he has a museum dedicated in his honor. This weekend, Ronaldo was on hand to witness the unveiling of a new statue made in his image. What can we say? The statue is sporting a huge erection....
Viggo Mortensen Calls Cristiano Ronaldo A Pretty Boy Choke Artist
Viggo Mortensen—the NYC-born, Buenos Aires-raised Danish-American actor most famous for playing Aragorn in the Lord of the Rings movies—is a humongous fan of Argentine club San Lorenzo. His team has reached the final of the FIFA Club World Cup, where they face Real Madrid. As well as acting, Mortens...
Spanish Soccer Official Bails On Meeting To Go To Real Madrid Game
One of the most pressing concerns in Spanish soccer today is how to deal with fan violence. Apparently, a more pressing concern is whether Real Madrid will win the Club World Cup that takes place this week, since the president of Spanish Soccer blew off a meeting addressing the violence to watch Los...
Real Madrid Are Way, Way Too Good
For practically any other club in the world, missing players like James Rodríguez and Luka Modrić would be reason for panic. The absurdly deep squad of Real Madrid, though, can plug in the most expensive player of all time, and a little Spanish genius, and maybe play even better....
Orlando Scandrick Plays <i>Madden</i> To Win, Even At A Children's Hospital
Orlando Scandrick apparently visited a children's hospital yesterday, and according to linebacker Justin Durant, Scandrick whooped some punk in Madden. The Cowboys cornerback even went with a surprise onside kick on the kid. You have to be ready for anything, little Timmy....
How Is Madison Bumgarner Even A Real Person?
If you were to judge Sports Illustrated's big Sportsman of the Year feature on Madison Bumgarner simply by the magazine's cover and Tom Verducci's lede—"In one of Earth's great hardwood forests, that wind swoops and soars through white pines, maples, oaks, chestnuts and poplars..."—you might roll ...
17 Real Madrid Fans Banned From Stadium For Chants Of "Messi's A Retard"
You can understand, in light of the recent violence in Spanish soccer, why La Liga officials are a little sensitive to negative fan behavior, but this might be a bit much. Marca has reported that the league has banned 17 Real Madrid for chants aimed at Lionel Messi—"Messi's a retard"—and Catalonia—"...
Nets Superfan Ejected, Carried Out Of MSG Without His Prosthetic Leg
In what will go down as the most exciting moment of either team's season, a well-known Nets fan was physically ejected from last night's game against the Knicks. His prosthetic leg—which security guards said he had used to hit another fan, something disputed by multiple eyewitnesses—was left behind....
Cristiano Ronaldo Gets Seriously Mad At Losing Meaningless Competition
Judging by Cristiano Ronaldo's legitimately pissed off response to his team losing what was supposed to be a friendly little contest at a sponsored event, we can add his name to the ranks of Michael Jordan, and other athletes who hate losing even something as small as a coin flip with a fervency u...
New Footage Of Spanish Hooligan Brawl Shows Murdered Man Thrown In River
The 200-person battle between Atlético Madrid and Deportivo La Coruña ultras that resulted in one death has understandably been a huge story in Spain. We now have additional footage of the event. Above is video of the murdered Depor fan as he is thrown into the Manzanares River....
Massive Soccer Hooligan Brawl Leaves One Man Beaten, Thrown Into River
Earlier this morning, Atlético Madrid and Deportivo la Coruña were set to do battle in Madrid. But before the match kicked off, some 200 or so rival fans decided to stage an actual fight, which resulted in knife wounds, head injuries, and one man suffering a heart attack before getting thrown into a...
This Cristiano Ronaldo Ballon D'Or Campaign Is Getting Really Gross
UEFA president Michel Platini made a pretty reasonable comment in Madrid earlier this week, saying in his opinion the Ballon d'Or should go to a German player after the country's success in the World Cup. The statement set off the Real Madrid spin machine though, and the team took matters into their...
Zinedine Zidane No Longer Has To Pretend Not To Coach Team He Coaches
A couple months ago, we told you about how Zinedine Zidane, manager of Real Madrid Castilla, was under investigation for not having the proper coaching qualifications. The Frenchman had two ways to fight the impending punishment: either cadge up the qualifications or deny that he was actually the ma...
Xabi Alonso Forced To Apologize To Ronaldo For Stupid, Fake Controversy
Remember that dumb story Real Madrid pitched to their stooges at Marca yesterday, where some milquetoast statements of Xabi Alonso's were folded, kneaded, and ultimately transformed into direct insults to former teammates Cristiano Ronaldo and Iker Casillas? Well, it worked....
Meet <em>Marca</em>, The Hilarious Propaganda Arm Of Real Madrid
It's maybe a little difficult for Americans to grasp just how deeply and blatantly in the tank the European press can be for the local XI. And no one is deeper and more blatantly in the tank for the local XI than the media in Spain, where the local XI means either Barcelona and Real Madrid and where...
Rondae Hollis-Jefferson Dunks Over 7'6" Mamadou N'Diaye
UC-Irvine's Mamadou N'Diaye is Division I's tallest basketball player at seven feet, six inches tall. Arizona's Rondae Hollis-Jefferson dunked over him tonight....
The Best NBA Players Win 50 Or More Games By Their Third Year
Outside of the occasional planetary destruction of a Beast Mode run or five-inning save in Game 7, football and baseball don't really lend themselves to pinning a team's wins and losses on a single player. But basketball is a little different. Quarterbacks don't play defense and baseball actually is...