manchester-united Page 9 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Paul Pogba's Weirdo Penalty Is The First Premier League Goal Of The Season
At the start of a game that probably shouldn’t be played right now (I mean really, the World Cup ended less than a month ago for chrissakes, don’t these guys deserve some rest?), a player that probably shouldn’t be playing (Paul Pogba had a big role in that World Cup right up till the end, you might...
Alex Ferguson Undergoes Emergency Brain Surgery Following Hemorrhage
Alex Ferguson, the legendary former manager of Manchester United, underwent emergency brain surgery Saturday following a brain hemorrhage, according to an update from the team:...
Manchester City's Title Run Ends With A Wet Fart
As the determiner of an ultimate champion, the soccer system is great. The table never lies and every match matters and you always know that, come the end of the long, grueling season, the team that stacked up the most points will hoist the trophy above their heads in front of their adoring fans wit...
Man City Win Premier League After West Brom Beat Man United
Manchester United came back from two goals down last weekend to prevent Man City from winning the Premier League. It was a memorable 3-2 win in the Manchester derby; it wouldn’t stop City from winning the league, but it was at least a nice moment....
Manchester City Hit A Few Bumps On The Road To Immortality
By any conceivable criteria, this year’s Manchester City bunch should go down as one of the greatest Premier League teams of all time. In the face of the deepest, richest, savviest array of clubs from top to bottom in league history, as one member of a staggeringly competitive cadre of six superteam...
Soccer Fans Are Back To Hurling Yellow, Banana-Shaped Objects At Black Players [UPDATE]
A fan in Manchester threw a yellow, banana-shaped object onto the pitch early in today’s City-United derby either at Man City’s Raheem Sterling or United’s Ashley Young, both of whom are black....
World Rejoices As Shitty Manchester United Team Knocked Out Of Champions League
Yesterday’s Manchester United-Sevilla Champions League match was the best game of the knockout rounds thus far. Not because these are two particularly great teams competing—they both are pretty bad—nor because they played especially well—the game was largely awful. No, this match was great for prett...
Bucs And Manchester United Owner Ed Glazer Will Host A Big Trump Reelection Fundraiser
Ed Glazer, whose family owns the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and Manchester United, will host an exclusive fundraiser for Donald Trump tonight at his house in Beverly Hills. The President’s schedule and plans in Southern California are shrouded in secrecy, but he’ll spend the evening at Glazer’s $22.7 mill...
Sky Sports Suspends Jamie Carragher After He Spits At Heckler And His Daughter
Jamie Carragher, the former Liverpool legend who is now a popular TV commentator, has been suspended by Sky Sports for this video of him spitting in the direction of a 14-year-old girl whose father had been heckling Carragher while the two men were driving....
David de Gea Is A Freak
Manchester United did not deserve to draw Sevilla 0-0 on the road this afternoon, but the good thing about soccer is that the scarcity of goals produces all manner of undeserved results. United took just a single shot on goal and they never seemed to get their offense into a reasonably high gear, in...
Arsenal Punked Out Of Yet Another Star Player
If you had to pick a single image to represent Arsenal’s enduring subjugation in English soccer’s hierarchy, you could do a lot worse than one showing Robin van Persie lifting the Premier League trophy. van Persie famously pined for that title after failing to win it with Arsenal after nearly a deca...
Manchester United Need To Stay The Fuck Away From Our Wonderteen
The good thing about having one of the soccer world’s most coveted young attacking prospects is that the eyes of the game’s biggest clubs will be focused on the kid, each team projecting out his possibly incredible future and positioning themselves to snatch it for themselves if they so decide to ma...
Romelu Lukaku Did Not Leave Everton Because Of "Voodoo"
Farhad Moshiri, the majority shareholder of Everton, took some time at a shareholders’ meeting yesterday to explain, according to him, why his club could not convince former Toffee and current Manchester United striker Romelu Lukaku not to leave last summer. Moshiri’s bizarre explanation—that Lukaku...
Romelu Lukaku Stretchered Off After Brutal Head-To-Head Collision
Manchester United striker Romelu Lukaku was stretchered off the pitch early in the first half today after a nasty-looking head-to-head collision with Southampton centre back Wesley Hoedt. It didn’t look like much in real time, but the angle on this review shows the crown of Hoedt’s head squared up w...
Jesse Lingard Saved Manchester United's Ass Once Again, And That Is A Problem
Jesse Lingard is a lot of things. He is incredibly smart, hardworking, almost perfect when it comes to executing his tactical role, versatile, a savvy mover, a nifty finisher in and around the box, great at link-up play, and, in his humility and professionalism, an exemplary figure for all homegrown...
Steven Defour's Free Kick Golazo Helped Disappoint Manchester United
It hasn’t been a festive holiday period for José Mourinho and Manchester United. After conceding a last-second equalizer against Leicester on the 23rd to drop two points, United have followed up with another underwhelming performance on Boxing Day. The Red Devils drew 2-2 at home to Burnley, the bes...
Bristol City Fans Invade The Pitch After Last-Minute Winner Against Manchester United
Korey Smith sent home a stoppage-time winner for Bristol City to give his club a 2-1 win over Manchester United in the League Cup quarterfinals today. Although United can mostly shrug off this defeat in a relatively unimportant competition, the Bristol fans at Ashton Gate won’t forget their night fo...
Rio Ferdinand Still Gets Hella Hyped Watching Manchester United Play
Rio Ferdinand hasn’t played professional soccer since 2015, and he hasn’t suited up for Manchester United since the year before that, but as this clip of his exuberant celebrations while covering United’s recent thrilling win over Arsenal proves, he remains very much invested in the goings on at Old...
Manchester United Fan Is Fookin' Pissed About Losing The Fookin' Derby
Lest you think Arsenal fans have a monopoly on incensed postgame rants helpfully broadcast on fan-driven Youtube channels, here is a completely apoplectic Manchester United supporter doing his best Troopz impression right after the derby loss. Could’ve used a few more “bloods” and “fams,” but very s...
They Should Probably Just Give Manchester City The Premier League Title Already
The best big games are clarifying. They’re matches in which the enormity of the moment can turn anyone watching into a fidgeting mess, and in which both teams are given the opportunity to match the game’s magnitude with a peak performance. The moment elevates the performances rather than engulfs it,...