mat Page 89 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Howard Eskin Is Very Upset That New Phillies Manager Gabe Kapler Masturbates
The Phillies held a press conference today to introduce Gabe Kapler as the team’s new manager. It was Kapler’s first time speaking to the assembled Philadelphia media, and he got a good introduction into a major part of his new job....
95 Theses, Ranked
It is the 500th anniversary of the Reformation. Martin Luther’s 95 theses, ranked:...
Brian Bowen Is A Bargain At $100,000<em></em>
Rick Pitino couldn’t believe his good fortune. For months, high school basketball star Brian Bowen had been pursued by the sorts of programs that would ordinarily pursue such a talent—Texas, Arizona, Michigan State. Then, in early June, the lanky, 6-foot-7 small forward suddenly and unexpectedly com...
The NHL Didn't Want You To See The Best Game Of The Night
The NHL clearly knew that they had a great game on their hands tonight, with two of its three biggest stars—Connor McDavid and Sidney Crosby—going toe to toe in Pittsburgh. They even promoted it like a must-watch event!...
Check Out An Actually Interesting Debate On Amateurism In College Sports
If you’re tired of hearing college coaches and athletic directors stumbling over themselves to repeat the same tired, NCAA-issued lines about maintaining the “integrity” of college sports, you’re in luck. Starting at 7 p.m., the college sports model will be put under a microscope, as Deadspin friend...
Matt Martin And Mitch Marner Bond By Huffing Smelling Salts
Maple Leafs linemates Matt Martin and Mitch Marner indulged in smelling salts during Wednesday’s 6-3 win over Detroit, because huffing chemicals with a teammate is one of hockey’s most intimate moments....
Winnipeg Jets Players Catch, Release River Monster
Winnipeg Jets center Matt Hendricks and defenseman Dustin Byfuglien have both been dealing with minor injuries, a foot problem and a “soft-tissue issue,” respectively. Their rehab of choice this week involved taking advantage of a mandatory off-day to head out on British Columbia’s Fraser River and ...
Tony Ferguson, Conor McGregor's Perfect Opponent, Will Likely Never Get To Fight Him<em></em>
Saturday, at UFC 216, the UFC awarded an interim 155-pound belt to Tony Ferguson following a third-round triangle choke of Kevin Lee. It was a wild, action-packed, back-and-forth fight between two legitimate talents in MMA’s deepest and most compelling division....
There Might Finally Be Some Transparency In Tennis Match-Fixing Investigations<em></em>
The Tennis Integrity Unit, the sport’s governing body for investigating corruption, typically describes its work in anonymizing generality, which can be frustrating for anyone who wants to know the gory details beyond “Which tournament was it?” In August, the TIU did however make an unusual move: It...
Kentucky Governor On NCAA Scandal: Pay The Players Already
With one of his state’s most well-known universities once again embroiled in a national recruiting scandal, Kentucky governor Matt Bevin took time in an interview with radio station WKYX to address Louisville’s latest missteps and, opposed to his hollow, bullshit statements on gun control, addressed...
The Matt Harvey Situation Is So Damn Sad
To look at Matt Harvey’s year is to see everything that could be and has been wrong with the Mets rotation lately: bad luck and bad health, managed rather poorly, resulting in bad pitching when there is any pitching at all. Individually, each of these factors typically gets reduced to a dumb punchli...
Good-For-Nothing White Sox Spoil Ninth Inning No-Hitter With Pointless Double
Matthew Boyd took a no-hitter into the top of the ninth today against the Chicago White Sox, with the Tigers winning 12-0. Boyd had allowed one base-runner all day, on a third inning walk. Adam Engel led off the bottom of the ninth with a pop out to third; Kevan Smith, hitting for Rob Brantly, groun...
Be The Most Efficient Person At The Laundromat, And Never Lose Another Sock Again<em></em>
Would you like to become the most courteous person at the laundromat?...
Hideki Matsuyama Doesn't Give A Shit About The Damn Green
Hideki Matsuyama walked onto the tee box at the par-four 15th at the BMW Championship today on a nice little run, having birdied each of the last three holes to pull fiver under on the tournament and three under on the day. Perhaps charged by this run of success, Matsuyama got into his tee shot and ...
FS1 Won't Be Airing Jason Whitlock's Latest Colin Kaepernick Skit
On Tuesday, All Takes Matter co-host Jason Whitlock started an internet firestorm with this tweet:...
Matt Chapman: Please Respect The Oakland A's, Do Not Stare At Us While We're In The Batter's Box
After arguing with Angels catcher Juan Graterol during today’s fourth inning, A’s third baseman Matt Chapman received the very special honor of his first career ejection. The argument had its origins in a larger beef over whether or not the A’s were stealing signs—they swear that they weren’t, the A...
The Mets Will Pitch Matt Harvey On Short Rest, For Reasons Passing Understanding
It’s nothing short of cruel that the Mets have to find a way to finish out these next 26 games. Their season has gone so completely into the toilet; they haven’t won consecutive games since August 10; they’re 24 games back of the Nationals in the NL East and 14 games out of the NL Wild Card; they’ve...
Here Are The Tomato Psychos
Valencia, Spain, is a place of many good festivals. For example, every March they do this festival called Las Fallas where all the neighborhoods in the city construct these beautiful, elaborate, occasionally gigantic papier-mâché figures and scenes that fill most of whatever intersection or square o...