miami-marlins Page 4 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Marlins Give Up Homer On First Pitch Of Season
About 25 seconds into the baseball season, the Miami Marlins were losing....

MLB Season Preview: What You Need To Know For 40 Minutes Of Marlins Baseball
Aw shit yeah, buddies, it’s Opening Day! The good kind of Opening Day, too. One of those classics on which all 30 teams—well, except for the Nats and Reds and Tigers and Pirates, because their games have already been postponed—play on the same day and it’s non-stop baseball. I do have one piece of b...

"Marlins Will Soar" Is The Only Anthem The Miami Marlins Will Ever Need, Or Deserve
When you follow a perennially shitty team like the Miami Marlins, change can feel both sudden and incremental. The single games or plays that torpedoed one season or another in variously spectacular fashion vanish from the memory, if only because there was never anything meaningful to lose in the fi...

Derek Jeter On The Marlins' Dinger Machine: "It's Big. It's Big. It's Big."
Much of the Miami Marlins’ roster from last season has departed, but the team’s true centerpiece—the home run sculpture in the outfield—is set to remain, at least for now. That’s not for lack of trying by CEO Derek Jeter, who’s indicated that he’s not a fan. But the fact that the statue is considere...

MLBPA Files Grievance Against Four Teams For Being Cheap Bastards With Revenue-Sharing Money
Let us use the Rays as an example, because, hell, if the Rays didn’t want to be used as the poster team for hemorrhaging salary with no clear goal other than to shovel cash into its ownership’s maw, maybe they shouldn’t have so conspicuously nuked a roster that was five games out of a playoff spot....

Bryce Harper Forced Don Mattingly Into Clowning Himself
The Marlins are a cynical disaster of a franchise with no apparent interest in winning baseball games, and the obviousness of all that has put the actual members of the team in a tough spot. The players on the Marlins still have to go out and play 162 games and pretend like the reason for them takin...

Sleazy Dirtbag Jeffrey Loria Sued By Miami-Dade County Over Marlins Sale Profits
True scumbag Jeffrey Loria treated the good people of Miami to one final insult on his way out of town, using tricky accounting to avoid paying Miami-Dade County an agreed-upon share of the profits from his sale of the team. Now it appears Miami-Dade is suing his sorry ass. From a Miami Herald repor...

Report: David Samson Flipped When Julio The Octopus Accidentally Won The Marlins' Sea Creature Race<em></em>
This winter has held plenty in the way of absurd news about the Miami Marlins; it hasn’t even been two months since a full news cycle was devoted to Marlins Man complaining on the radio about his lack of invite to a season ticketholders’ meeting with Derek Jeter, ultimately receiving an invite to sa...

Report: Jeffrey Loria Takes One Last Dump On Miami
Former Marlins owner Jeffrey Loria, who seemingly did everything in his power to cripple the city of Miami when he managed to scam the city into spending billions of dollars to build him a new baseball stadium, has found yet another way to be a disgusting rich person....

MLBPA Sends Limp-Dick Memo About Payroll Slashing, Is Summarily Shooed Off
Next winter will be the real bellwether for the state of MLB payroll spending—handwringing over shrinking payroll today might disappear all at once if the movement of next winter’s studs lifts all boats—but the early indicators of this winter are troubling. The hot stove is cool, there’s a boatload ...

The Only Fun Miami Marlin Is Probably Better At Basketball
Even in a shamelessly slow offseason, the Miami Marlins have clobbered all competitors in a race to become the least interesting team in baseball. They traded Giancarlo Stanton, who is possibly the most exciting dude in the entire sport, for peanuts. The main goal, which the team barely bothered to ...

Guy Who Dreamed Of Playing For Marlins Should Be Careful What He Wishes For<em></em>
Coral Springs native Lewis Brinson is excited to patrol the field in front of the Marlins’ dinger machine for his childhood team. The Marlins acquired the 23-year-old prospect yesterday as part of the return package for trading Christian Yelich to Milwaukee....

Christian Yelich Freed From Miami, Joins Surprisingly Fun Brewers Club
The hot stove is warm, baby. A week after Christian Yelich’s agent announced the outfielder’s relationship with the Marlins was “irretrievably broken,” he’s been shipped off to the Brewers in exchange for a solid haul of prospects: outfielders Lewis Brinson and Monte Harrison, second baseman Isan Di...

The Hot Stove And The Triumph Of Shamelessness
Broadly speaking, America has never been great on shame. Pride has always been a strong suit, and fucking things up in shameful and improbable ways was the national pastime long before a more racist version of Slimer from Ghostbusters got elected president, but shame just sort of never caught on her...

Christian Yelich's Agent Says Relationship With Marlins Is "Irretrievably Broken"
Christian Yelich is just about the last good Miami Marlins player standing, so naturally, he’d also like to escape the Derek Jeter regime’s austerity plan before the start of the season. Yelich’s agent Joe Longo spoke with ESPN’s Jerry Crasnick and made it abundantly clear that Yelich wants out imme...

A Major-League Team Is Not A Business<em></em>
You don’t need any insight into the inner workings of the Miami Marlins to understand why the franchise is currently in the midst of stripping itself of every decent player making even a modest salary. The team was just purchased by a bunch of people who couldn’t really afford it, and now they need ...

Marlins Plan: Now That We've Traded Away Beloved Players And Alienated Fans, Let's Increase Ticket Revenue
The Miami Herald is publishing a five-part series on the Marlins’ new front office’s plans for the team, and per today’s introductory piece, the essence of CEO Derek Jeter’s strategy is something like this: Make big payroll cuts by trading away the team’s most popular players, increase gate revenue ...

Rob Manfred Whines To ESPN Brass After Getting Shredded By Dan Le Batard
Rob Manfred left his Wednesday appearance on the Dan Le Batard Show with a freshly torn new one, having received the full brunt of Le Batard’s wrath over the fire sale taking place in the Miami Marlins organization. Now The Big Lead is reporting that MLB officials “complained about the spot to the h...

Dan Le Batard Went For Rob Manfred's Neck
On today’s edition of the Dan Le Batard Show, ESPN radio host Dan Le Batard got to interview MLB commissioner Rob Manfred about the Miami Marlins. Things got heated very quickly....

Derek Jeter's Marlins Town Hall Meeting Sounds Like A Beautiful Stupid Mess
The above photo is from a New York City event hosted by business magazine Fast Company back in October, a talk titled “Finding Professional Fulfillment After The Dream Career, Featuring Derek Jeter.”...