minor-enterprise - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
If A Game Lasts Longer Than Four Hours, Please Consult Your Doctor
A reader writes: "Hey guys, So I hate to have to play the "penis" card here, but somebody down in North Carolina needs to be admonished for selecting a logo with some very Freudian undertones."...
Experience The Fun Of Minnesota's U.S. Senate Election Recount With The St. Paul Saints
Here's comedian and senatorial candidate Al Franken throwing out the first pitch at a St. Paul Saints game earlier this season. It was a wise move on Mr. Franken's part, considering that the Saints' attendance that day was 12,450, and he's currently trailing in his U.S. Senate recount with Norm Cole...
Ill-Tempered Apple Calls Out Nightmare Ant In Fort Wayne Mascot Showdown
No, this isn't a peyote flashback; the above image is of a real minor league baseball mascot. This as-yet-unnamed, furious-looking apple represents the Fort Wayne TinCaps, the newest member of the Class-A Midwest League. You may know Fort Wayne as home of the Fort Wayne Mad Ants, an Indiana Pacers D...
Come Help The Jamestown Jammers Salute Slightly Flawed Things
If you can't make it out to see the New York Giants take on the New England Patriots in tonight's preseason game, why not do the next best thing?* The Jamestown Jammers minor league baseball team (Class A New York-Penn League) is holding its gala "Saltute to Imperfection Night" at Diethrick Park, wh...
Jacko Turns 50, Hockey Night, And The Political Incorrectness Of Midget Wrestling
And so we come to the close of another Minor League Baseball season. And what a season it's been: We watched babies enjoying beer, were introduced to the magical wonders of Wizard Cat, and thrilled to the antics of a giant, dancing taco. The Macon Music announced with great fanfare, and then cancell...
It's Over: Minor League Baseball Gives One Candidate The Nod
We have a new President. I suppose they'll go on with these convention thingees anyway, because the deposit on the arenas are non-refundable. But we know who's going to win. Minor league teams in six cities handed out bobbleheads of the two Presidential candidates during special promotions last week...
Bobblection Week 2008: They Bobble, You Decide
Although the bobblehead craze has pretty much swept the globe, countries generally do not use them to select their leaders; well, except for Spain. But perhaps they should. In 2004, a series of Minor League Baseball bobblehead promotions correctly predicted the U.S. Presidential Election, when other...
William Hung Tells All
And she bangs, she bangs/Oh baby When she moves, she moves/I go crazy 'Cause she looks like a flower but she stings like a bee/Like every girl in history/She bangs, she bangs ... It had to be this way: Minor League Baseball and the career of William Hung, hopelessly intertwined, so that when you thi...
Get Ready For British Humor Night With The West Michigan Whitecaps
Welcome to Minor Enterprise. But follow only if you are men of valor. For the entrance to this cave is guarded by a monster, a creature so foul and cruel that no man yet has fought with it and lived. Bones of full fifty men lie strewn about its lair ... therefore sweet knights if you may doubt your ...
Fear Factor In The Northwoods League
A collegiate summer baseball league team called the Madison Mallards was handing out free tickets on Thursday that included all-you-can-eat snack bar privileges; a pretty sweet deal, considering all you had to do to earn it was to eat a dead beetle. The Mallards offered the tickets to the first 250 ...
Please Come To Altoona, Will Ferrell!
Ladies and gentlemen, can I please have your attention. I've just been handed an urgent and horrifying news story. I need all of you, to stop what you're doing and listen. Cannonball!...
Billy Joel And Pork Rind Sculpting: Your Week Is Hereby Planned
Minor Enterprise has a way of pleasin', I don't know why it is, but there doesn't have to be a reason. Anyway ......