mlb Page 531 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Please Refrain From Humping The $1.5 Billion Stadium, Thank You
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Hal Steinbrenner, Captain Of The Obvious
The quiet, less annoying Steinbrenner boy says some of the tickets at Yankee Stadium "might be overpriced." Also, World War II might have gotten a few people killed. [ESPN]...

Oh, Now That Is An Embarrassing Looking Box Score
Today's final from Bradenton, Florida: Pittsburgh Pirates 4, Manatee Community College Lancers... 6. It's gonna be a good year, Bucco fans! [Raise the Jolly Roger]...

Is This The End Of The Line For Matt Bush?
Troubled former Padres' No. 1 overall draft pick Matt Bush released by Blue Jays, for not complying with the "zero tolerance terms of his agreement." Uh oh. [Toronto Globe And Mail]...

Cubs Just Can't Let Go Of Kerry Wood
Kerry Wood's Wrigley Field locker will remain unoccupied this season, even though the fragile fireballer is now pitching for Cleveland. They've also been asking mutual friends if Wood has said anything about them. [NBC Chicago]...

Who Watches The Umpires?
It's not QuesTec anymore. No, Major League Baseball has an even newer-fangled tool to monitor balls and strikes and I'm sure the league's umpires are just thrilled about it....

Jim Leyland Really Struggled With This Gary Sheffield Decision
"It's not good when you light up two Marlboro's at the same time at 3 a.m., washing it down with a glass of chocolate milk." Amen.[DetNews]...

Who Is This Dashing Soccer Player, And Why Is He Using His Hands?
Hint: He now makes millions playing a different sport, and once dated Scarlett Johansson and Jessica Biel. Yes, it's Derek Jeter, whose mom once again forgot to bring the post-game orange slices....

Tigers Don't Need Gary Sheffield After All
Detroit has dumped their $14 million DH with 499 career home runs. Oh, don't worry ... he gets to keep the money! [MLB; But The Game Is On]...

Well Why Even Bother Playing The Season Now?
Yankees installed as 9/2 favorites to win World Series, followed by Red Sox (11/2), Cubs (8/1) and, wait for it ... New York Mets (8/1). And your MVP is Mark Teixeira. [Bodog Life.com]...

D Train Goes Slightly Off The Tracks
The Tigers got clearance from the commissioner's office to put Dontrelle Willis on the DL with an anxiety disorder on Sunday. I thought only Tigers fans got those....

Opening Day At Citi Field, The House That You And I Built
The first player ever to hit a home run at Citi Field? Sean Lamont of Georgetown, which beat St. John's 6-4 on Sunday as Mets fans got to give their new, controversial ballpark a test drive....

Darren Daulton Still Delightfully Nuts
One would think that with the power of astral travel, Darren Daulton would choose to visit Vienna during the Renaissance, or Rome during the reign of the Caesars. But a card show in Ephrata, Pa.?...

Jose Tabata: Wife 'Completely Falsified Her Pregnancy'
The story of Jose Tabata and his 43-year-old wife is the gift that keeps on giving. Today's episode: She apparently told the 20-year-old outfielder that the baby she (allegedly) abducted was his....

Gentle, Velvety Hammer Of Justice Falls In Miguel Tejada Steroids Case
Astros star gets one year's probation, $5,000 fine for "misleading congress." Wait a minute; don't they do that to each other every minute they're in session? [San Francisco Chronicle]...

Schilling Finally Talks About His Retirement ... On A Video Game Site
Pitcher waited for Game Developers Conference in San Francisco to announce his decision, because he didn't want to deal with "the phone ringing off the hook. It was just a natural fit." [Sports Radio Interviews.com]...

So What's The Deal With Jose Tabata's Baby-Stealing Wife?
So if Pittsburgh Pirates outfield prospect Jose Tabata makes it to the majors — and early indications are that he probably will — how will this information fit on the back of his baseball card?...

Tigers' Game Called Due To Lightning, Plague Of Locusts, Flood
If Jesus is indeed a Tigers' fan, he can't be pleased with this. The Detroit Tigers are the only MLB team to have scheduled a game during the holy hours on Good Friday....

Raising Arizona: Wife Of Pirates' Minor Leaguer Questioned In Babynapping
Well, this is just what the Pirates needed. The wife of one of their top minor league prospects is being questioned in the apparent kidnapping of a baby from a Plant City, Fla. health clinic....

Marlins Re-Branding To Appeal To "Back To The Future II" Fans
The Marlins have finally won approval for a new stadium, which means they will become the Miami Marlins when the stadium opens in 2012. Because screw Florida. [Krisl.org]...