mo Page 436 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
<i>Tomorrowland </i>Is Hopeful, Uplifting, And Absolutely Intolerable
1. Tomorrowland is a movie about optimism and hope and brightness and good cheer, which probably explains why it put me in such a foul mood. It’s like that television evangelist who’s so smiley and squeaky-clean that you just know he’s up to something weird when no one’s looking. This movie spends m...
"I'm Not Getting <i>The Tonight Show</i>"; Watch Letterman's Final Monologue
Tonight is David Letterman’s last show after 33 years of hosting late night television. Here’s his final opening monologue, in which he looks back on his decades of work. ...
Nick, The Cubs Threw Out Your Grandma’s Personalized Brick
Nick, my man, we have some bad news. Remember when your sweet grandma bought a commemorative brick to be placed outside of Wrigley Field, one that would stand as a testament to her love for you and the Cubbies forever? Well, the Cubs just made a sucker out of your sweet grandma, because they threw t...
Report: IndyCar Driver Was Skewered In Practice Wreck
Canadian driver James Hinchcliffe will probably not race again this year after a brutal single-car crash during Indy 500 practice yesterday. It turns out this was the best-case scenario: according to a day-after report, Hinchcliffe came frighteningly close to bleeding out there on the track....
Occupy Softball
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What Are The Marlins Doing?
Jeffrey Loria has a nasty habit of firing his managers. With yesterday’s ax of Mike Redmond, GM Dan Jennings becomes the Marlins’ sixth manager since 2010, and marks Loria’s fifth in-season managing change dating back to 2001 with the Expos....
Marlins Fire Mike Redmond Minutes After Sixth Loss In Seven Games
Jeffrey Loria is a weird baseball man, and he continues to do weird baseball things....
Gennady Golovkin Pounds Willie Monroe Jr., Wins By Sixth-Round TKO
Scariest Man Alive Gennady Golovkin extended his undefeated record to 33-0 with a TKO of Willie Monroe Jr. in a bout that continues the legend of the Kazakh middleweight. Some analysts expected a more competitive fight, given Monroe’s 19-1 record and that Golovkin’s last fight, against Martin Murray...
Nürburgring 24 Driver Loses Wheel, Attempts To Repair It Himself
“This man is a legend.” A Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG GT3 driver at today’s 24 Hours Nürburgring lost a wheel and made a valiant effort to retrieve and repair it before giving in and allowing himself to be towed back to the pits. The commentary from Vodaphone’s broadcasters are priceless on this; the reas...
Under Armour Condemned Over Iwo Jima "Band Of Ballers" Basketball Shirt
A t-shirt that appropriates the imagery of raising the flag on Iwo Jima has apparel maker Under Armour under attack....
Bill Simmons's Goodbye Email: "I Am Done Being Involved With Grantland"
Since being fired by ESPN, Bill Simmons has sent multiple goodbye emails to members of the Grantland staff. Here is a portion of one of them:...
<i>Pitch Perfect 2 </i>Is Bigger, Bawdier, And Substantially Worse
1. Pitch Perfect 2 is a total bummer, and it takes a while to figure out why. The 2012 original was such a pleasant, charming surprise, smart and clever and warm-hearted, but also pleasantly geeky; a cappella groups are not the centerpiece of the collegiate experience in the world we live in, but Pi...
Report: Bill Simmons Won't Be Appearing On Any ESPN Platforms
When ESPN president John Skipper announced that he would not be renewing Bill Simmons’s contract last week—four months ahead of his current contract’s expiration date—a lot of people were left wondering how Simmons would spend his last few months as a lame-duck employee. According to Sports Illustra...
<i>The Professional </i>Is Deeply Problematic, Profoundly Cool, And Very '90s
Imagine the elevator pitch for The Professional. “Okay, so we’ve got this hitman, right? Only he’s not a cool hitman: He’s great at killing, but he’s also childlike, off-kilter, possibly on the spectrum. He doesn’t really have any friends or talk to anyone outside of ‘work.’ We’ll make sure he doesn...
Former Titans Player: Aaron Hernandez Said He'd Kill Me In A Game
Former Titans cornerback and current CFL nomad Ryan Mouton had a story to share Thursday. When the Patriots and Titans played in 2012, Mouton laid out Aaron Hernandez after a catch, knocking off the tight end’s helmet. Believe it or not, Mouton claimed Hernandez threatened the defensive back....
Soccer Manager Goes After Referee, Is Held Back By Riot Police
Montevideo Wanderers manager Alfredo Arias had to be held back by riot shield-bearing police following his team’s loss to Argentine side Racing Club in the second leg of tonight’s Copa Libertadores match....
CFL Team Investigating Extremely Woke, Holocaust-Questioning Player
The Montreal Alouettes are reportedly looking into the tweets of defensive lineman Khalif Mitchell, who has gone on a conspiracy-video kick over the past week....
Camden Yards Workers Screwed Over Yet Again
The other day, the Baltimore Orioles got lots of positive press by announcing that stadium staffers would be compensated for wages lost while a state of emergency was declared in the city. Two home games were canceled, another was played at an empty Camden Yards, and three others were moved to Tampa...
Álvaro Morata Might've Just Knocked His Old Team Out Of Champions League
Álvaro Morata, one of the best young strikers in the world and a Real Madrid youth product, just scored his second goal of this Champions League semifinal tie. Only it was for his new team, Juventus, and against his boyhood club....