monday-night-football Page 12 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Pity Poor John Bowie
As the Patriots cruised to yet another easy victory last night, with three more Tom Brady touchdowns and two more Randy Moss touchdowns, we take a look at the sad sack that is John Bowie....

Will The Patriots Score 38 Again?
This could be the last stand for the Bengals, early on anyway, and they're playing the absolute worst team you could play right now if you needed to make a last stand. Unfortunately, everyone's just going to talk about that CameraGate situation all night. Again....

MNF Heads Back To New Orleans
We suspect that tonight's "Monday Night Football" telecast from the Superdome will have the electricity and emotion of last year's MNF game, if just because we don't think Bono's gonna make the trip this year. (However: "Cowboy Mouth" will be in the house!_...

Woe To The Eagles Fans (And Those Who Sit Near Them)
The pregame festivities might have been more exciting than the actual game, but, nevertheless, we're gonna do our best to keep our distance from Eagles fans for the next couple of days....

Your Chance To See Philly Fans In Prime Time
A night game in Philadelphia always seems, to us, like asking for trouble. Even if fans actually do go to work today, if they leave at 5 p.m., they're gonna have enough time to really mess some matters up. Or, you know, paint their bodies....

Buzzsaw-49ers MNF Live Blog
All right, we'll tell you right now: This is a terrible idea. Not only have we been up since 4:15 this morning, but we're also in the odd position of attempting to type non-stop, for three hours, about the season opener of a team for which we have an emotional connection. And we're going to do it ...

Monday Night Football Returns ... And An Invitation
We noted that during the preseason, we enjoyed the work of the revamped "Monday Night Football" team; replacing Joe Theismann with Ron Jaworski really did make that much of a difference. But that was preseason....

ESPN's "Fans" Seem To All Have espn.com Email Addresses
If you watched "Monday Night Football" earlier this week, you might have noticed a new segment called ESPN's Rowdy Friends, in which fans are encouraged to shoot videos of them acting like idiots — which is what networks and leagues think we are, as they remind us daily — so the "best" ones can be ...

Wait ... A Tolerable Monday Night Football Broadcast?
So we were watching ESPN's "Monday Night Football" last night, and we noticed this odd feeling, a peculiar sensation that we had, up to that point, never experienced. We couldn't figure it out; were we developing some sort of cold? And then we realized: We were watching "Monday Night Football" ... a...

New MNF Booth Just Full Of Giggles!
Newsday's Neil Best documents a happening that seems specifically designed to make Joe Theismann pound his face repeatedly against a wall: a practice session with the new "Monday Night Football" crew. They're having so much fun!...

Theismann Still Bitching About MNF Firing
We're sure there are people out there other than Joe Theismann and Washington Post columnist Leonard Shapiro who will miss Theismann on "Monday Night Football" broadcasts next year. We just can't find any of them....

Mike And Mike Are Everywhere You Look
All told, we think we gave Mike and Mike too hard of a time on the whole spelling bee thing. They weren't so bad; maybe they toned down the schtick for ABC. Anyway, as part of ESPN's plan to have Mike Greenberg (the gay one) and Mike Golic (the fat one) broadcasting every event that Berman and Tiric...

Your Long National Nightmare Is Over
Over the weekend, Pro Football Talk reported that everybody's favorite mathematician Joe Theismann was likely out as Monday Night Football "analyst," with his likely replacement being the infinitely superior Ron Jaworski. Today, The New York Times gets in on the act, confirming it with ESPN sources....

But Who Will Exchange Witty Banter With Jim Belushi?
You may have seen the last of Joe "Norman Einstein" Theismann in the Monday Night Football booth. Pro Football Talk is reporting that Theismann is out, and will be replaced by the great Ron Jaworski....

Monday Night Football To Remain 66 2/3 Percent Bald
Whatever your thoughts on Tony Kornheiser on "Monday Night Football" might be — we think the man's hysterical in pretty much every format other than "Monday Night Football" (OK, and CBS primetime) — you best come to grips with them, because he's gonna be back next year....

Peyton Manning Does Brief Alpha Dog Impression
See, this is what we were talking about. Going into last night's Monday Night game, the Bengals were the team with the defense that was playing well at the right time, the Colts were collapsing (because Tony Dungy isn't "tough" enough, or something) and the entire AFC was topsy-turvy, if you don't m...

The Last Worthy MNF Game, We Suspect
In what should be an awfully fun and hopefully high-scoring Monday night game, the Indianapolis Colts and the Cincinnati Bengals, teams going in the ole "opposite directions" storyline. This being the NFL, everyone will forget the storylines once, you know, they actually play a game....

A Night For Loud Bears Fans And Silent Rams Ones
We spent a year and a half of our lives in St. Louis and went to two NFL games. The first was in 1998, when Tony Banks was the quarterback. You can imagine what happened then. The second time was in 1999, when Kurt Warner threw five touchdown passes on our 24th birthday to smash the then-vexing San ...

It's Rex Grossman's World, And We Are Just Satellites
We might make the argument that the most compelling figure in the NFL right now is Chicago Bears quarterback Rex Grossman. This is a guy who, at times — that is to say, during times that weren't in the last month-plus — has looked like a legitimate NFL quarterback, a guy who is a leader, as they say...

Jeff Garcia Cannot Be Destroyed By A Mortal Man
From our experience, when Jeff Garcia is making this motion, and he's about to chuck it long and downfield, something bad is about to happen. We mean, it's Jeff Garcia! The last few years, his main purpose has been to be the target of Terrell Owens' sublimated man-on-man urges....