nascar Page 16 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Nascar's Tony Stewart Donates 30 Bulletproof Vests to Police Dogs
No longer content to continue reading about brave police dogs who died because they weren't wearing vests, Tony Stewart has come to the rescue. The vests cost $695 each. If you didn't know that police dogs wore bulletproof vests then you roll with Chris Samuels and Clinton Portis and hate animals. S...

I'd Kill For Rusty Wallace's Race-Worn Underpants
Attempted murder: It's not just for metaphors anymore! A man hired a hitman to murder a witness in his upcoming trial and was going to pay him off with his NASCAR collectibles. Suffice to say, it didn't work....

Obama Sponsoring NASCAR #49 car at Pocono
Seeing John McCain's stealthy move with the Pittsburgh Steelers D-Line, Obama has raised him another sporting degree by becoming the first presidential candidate ever to sponsor an entire car. At least according to Sports Illustrated. This highlight of American political life is set to occur on Augu...

Delving Into That Creepy NASCAR Discrimination Case
Pretty sure we haven't mentioned that whole NASCAR $225 million racial/sexual discrimination lawsuit around these parts, perhaps because it appears to be so bad that Jason Whitlock said, "We owe Isiah Thomas and Sean Salisbury an apology." I'm not sure if I'd go that far, but if you haven't seen the...

Fiery NASCAR Crash Was The Work Of Scheming Terrorist Fire Ants
You always wondered if NASCAR drivers could turn right. Well, they can, but only once. The twisted remains of the vehicle you see here belonged to Michael McDowell, who rubbed the wall the wrong way (too hard, and straight on) in qualifying for this week's Samsung 500 at Texas Motor Speedway. But no...

Man's Ashes Have More Fun Than He Ever Did
Dear tiny infant Jesus, or as our brothers in the south call you, "Jezus," please welcome Big George Helms (pictured here) into your Heavenly kingdom. But first, kindly bear with us as his remains take a couple of laps at Las Vegas Motor Speedway. Then its over to the KFC drive-thru, and then straig...

Nicole Manske Will One Day Rule The World
So you probably new that NASCAR has its own Erin Andrews (although I prefer the original). But did you know that Nicole Manske has her sights set on the NFL? Manske, a former Miss Illinois Teen USA and native of Rockton, Ill. (where she was a high school cheerleader on the same squad with Danica Pat...

Making That NASCAR Love Connection
OK, I admit that the photo here is a cheap shot, and is not intended to be a representation of the typical NASCAR fan. After all, the woman isn't flashing her boobs. But let's just get on to the big news: Meet Me At The Races.com is here! If you're like me, you attend NASCAR events for just one reas...

One Day, NASCAR Will Own Your Ass
The Daytona 500 is this weekend. That's one of the more important of the Cars Going Around In A Circle contests they have on this planet. We don't understand NASCAR, obviously, but we suspect some of you do, so we've asked Jay Busbee, of Sports Gone South, to explain to us why we should care about ...

The Mavericks Invite You To Eat Their Dust
Those of you constantly demanding to see Dirk Nowitzki leaning out of a car window while taking a lap at the Texas Motor Speedway can stop your letters and e-mails: Your wish has finally been granted. Of course now that I see it, I have the urge to jump in the car and take my dog for a drive. Come'...

When Assimilation Goes Wrong: Negro NASCAR
You may remember The Assimilated Negro from his Negro Bowl I coverage for us last year. He returns to us to discuss NASCAR's odd decision to try to Negro-ize their sport....

NASCAR Fans Are Apparently Contagious
We've never been to a NASCAR race, but we imagine their big drunken vats of fun. We think it would be a grand time. The House Homeland Security Committee apparently doesn't agree ... unless they've gotten their shots, anyway....

Jeff Burton, Brought To You By The Color Orange
In a world where race cars are stamped with as many corporate sponsors that will fit on the sheet metal, it's really weird to see a car with no logo on the hood or sides. Seriously, it looks like Jeff Burton (#31) is driving an oversized Hot Wheels car in this Getty photo. There's a (logical?) reas...

Another Demographic Infuriated By ESPN
We are definitively not NASCAR experts, which takes away one of ours — and many sports fans' — favorite pastimes: Making fun of ESPN coverage of sporting events. Fortunately, the NASCAR diehards are taking care of that for us ... and they're stomping mad this morning....

ESPN Now Doing To NASCAR What It Does To Everything Else
This Friday, the much-hyped — so unusual for them — NASCAR On ESPN series kicks off. We're not inherent NASCAR fans, so we're not sure how the light, delicate ESPN is going to affect the sport's hardcore fans. But it's safe to say those fans are a little nervous....

A Baby Name Which Will Cause No Future Embarrassment Whatsoever
When all is said and done, I blame the mom. When your last name is Karr, and dad comes up with the brilliant idea of naming the new baby Chevy, that's when you put your foot down, ladies. And you put it down hard ... on dad's genitals while he's sleeping, if necessary. And if he still insists, then ...

Big Weekend For NASCAR Substances
It was an active weekend in the world of NASCAR. Well, it must have been, anyway, considering we're writing about it. And they involved coke and heroin!...

Your Importance Is Minimal, Child
We don't mean to imply that Jeff Gordon's newborn child — Ella Sofia Gordon, born yesterday at 9:09 — isn't going to be the most important person in her own family, but the following paragraph appeared on his official site today. (Via the Celebrity Baby Names Blog ... now there's a blog! It's almost...

NASCAR Is Tolerant Of All Kinds Of Things
A fellow named Chip Williams, who used to do public relations work for NASCAR, was sentenced yesterday to 26 years in prison. He pled guilty to charges of using a computer to entice a child into sexual activity and coercing a minor into sexual activity for the purpose of making pornography....

Most NASCAR Owners Started This Way
Because she adds to what already could be the most historic weekend ever for women in auto racing, let's take a second to appreciate the "NASCAR stripper."...