new-jersey Page 13 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Nets Are First Domino To Fall To Russian Invaders
The NBA has formally approved the sale of the New Jersey Nets to mad Russian billionaire Mikhail Prokhorov. To celebrate, all season tickets will receive a free cobalt mine. [NY1]...

Last Night's Winner: The Almighty Dollar
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Daniel Goldstein, the last man standing between the Nets and their shiny Brooklyn arena, who just got $3 million to sit down. That stinks....

The Nets Should Party Harder Next Season
Jersey players were reportedly "downing tequila shots with a bevy of hot blondes" the night before their "big game" against Miami. Look, a 70-loss team has no big games, but that double-OT effort was pretty inspired. !Mas tequila, por favor!...

Today In "Holy Crap, This Guy Is Buying An NBA Team": Prokhorov Does Business With A Dictator
New Jersey legislator Bill Pascrell Jr. is calling for an inquiry that into the sale of the Nets because prospective owner Mikhail Prokhorov may or may not have done business with reigning Dictator of the Year, Zimbabwe's Robert Mugabe. Of course....

Lou Piniella Bawls Out With His Balls Out
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

High School Hockey Championship Decided — 21 Years Later
The 1989 New Jersey state title, abandoned after a measles outbreak, was finally played earlier this month. This story is like if Chris Chelios and J-Woww had a baby. [Star-Ledger, via Puck Daddy]...

Last Night's Winner: Newark
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the people of New Jersey's shooting-est city, who managed to make it an entire month without getting murdered. This is actually an accomplishment in Newark....

Joshua Cribbs Gets His Wife The Worst Birthday Present Ever
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Correction: Mikhail Prokhorov Is Your New Favorite Sports Billionaire
Last week, we pondered whether software tycoon Larry Ellison would soon become the NBA's craziest billionaire owner. Not a chance, once Mike "Mad Dog" Prokhorov suits up for the New Jersey Nets....

Nets CEO Shamed By Ashamed Fans He Drove To Shamefulness
Nets executive Brett Yormark gave a mea culpa, the day after getting into a shouting match with a fan wearing a paper bag. Hey, at least there was a fan to argue with....

Today In Sports Endurance Achievements: Three-Minute Hockey Fight
Saturday, St. Louis Blues bruiser Cam Janssen and New Jersey Devil's welterweight Pierre-Luc "I Wasn't In Duran Duran" Letourneau-Leblond lethrew down during the first period. Three minutes later, they had become Übermensch. [Fan House; tunes by TV on the Radio]...

Coach K Will Be The Next Guy To Declare He Has No Interest In The Nets
A source tells the Bergen Record: "He's the Nets' first choice. It comes down to if he wants to leave Duke and his comfortable setting and take on a new challenge." Krzyzewski just produced a close approximation of a laugh....

Rick Pitino Dismisses Reports He Will Soon Be Doing His Humping On The Floors Of New Jersey Diners
The New York Daily News reported this morning that the priapic Boy Genius had "intermediaries" contact the Nets to express his interest in the team's coaching job. Pitino managed to deny the story without referencing 9/11 once. Good for him....

If The Nets Lose And No One's Around To See It, Does It Still Count In The Standings? (Yes.)
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Clueless Announcers Dissect Obscene Jersey Salute (Fellator Update)
To all the middle-age announcers out there: when you see a fan making a hand gesture you don't understand, you shouldn't ask your broadcast partner to explain it. It just might be a blowjob pantomime....

If MLB Had Relegation, This Would Be Quite The Battle
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Jayson Williams Pleads Guilty To Shooting
Jayson Williams, Troubled Former Athlete, showed up in court today to plead guilty—for real this time—to aggravated assault for accidentally shooting his chauffeur. That, plus about 18 months in prison, will end his legal ordeal....

"I Was There...": Best Sporting Events You've Seen In Person This Decade
There are plenty of decade retrospectives happening everywhere right now (including here), but we'd also like you to participate. Tell us about the best game you've seen in person this decade. Mine: Game 7, 2000 NHL Eastern Conference Finals....

How Can One Game Contain So Much Fail?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Nets Set The Tone For A Day Of Celebrating The Smallest Victories
Just in time for a tilt with their sorta-not-as-hapless cross-river rivals, the New Jersey Nets snapped their season-opening 18-game losing streak with a 97-91 victory over the Charlotte Bobcats. The expectations for a 64-18 record just went through the roof!...