nfl Page 1006 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Matt Leinart Wasting Opportunities Already
ESPN.com has gotten Matt Leinart to document his draft process with a "Draft Diary," detailing his experiences in the days leading up to the NFL Draft....
Brett Favre Will Do Something, Someday, Maybe
We swear to God, we just got this news alert from ESPN.com about Brett Favre's "retirement" "plans."...
Kornheisers On A Plane
One of the most common questions we received yesterday, in the wake of the release of the 2006 NFL schedule, was: How's new MNF broadcaster Tony Kornheiser going to get out to Washington for the two games in Seattle? The notoriously airplane-phobic (and Cruiser-less) "PTI" host seemed to be in a s...
Look! It's A Big Sheet Of NFL Lists!
Ordinarily we make fun of ESPN overkill around these parts, but we won't lie to you: We have absolute no problem with the network's around-the-clock, BREAKING NEWS, live live live! coverage of the release of the complete NFL schedule. If you're not around a TV, it's really something to watch; they...
Culpepper Now Free To Have Naked Women Dance In His General Vicinity (But There, And Only There)
New Dolphins quarterback Daunte Culpepper need not worry about the potential new ramifications of the term "lap dance" from jail; he has been cleared of all charges in the sex boat incident. His former teammate Moe Williams was not so lucky; he'll still have to strand trial, along with decidedly m...
It's Never The Crime, It's Always The Coverup ...
We know football season is five months off, but it may take that long to unravel this mystery. At the risk of going all CSI: Crime Scene Investigation on you, we present the photo above, sent in from a reader with the following note attached:...
The Best Way To Personalize Your Plates
Spotted by a reader on the Upper West Side of Manhattan this weekend. This is not our car. Oh, but if it were....
The Best Damn... April Fools Joke.
Okay, I was had, and I am dumb A couple of readers have written in (and my thanks to them) to tell me that the "fight" between Michael Strahan and Tom Arnold on The Best Damn Sports Show was, in fact, an April Fools Joke. My congratulations to everyone involved. I didn't think those guys were capa...
Best Damn Sports Show Fight
So if you missed Friday night's episode of The Best Damn Sports Show (and how could you?), check about the above video. Tom Arnold and Michael Strahan get into kind of a little sissy chair fight. And Michael Strahan did not win. He's on the ground making noises like he's hurt, cursing at Arnold, who...
Another Great Staring-Into-The-Camera Rap
"I have one thing to tell you, T.O.: I. Hate. You. You like writing disses? I can write them right back to you."...
Oh, You Didn't Forget About Kyle, Did You?
He might not drink like a champion, but his efforts have nevertheless clearly reached the level of "epic" and "historic" in recent years. His name is Kyle Orton. He is but one man, but his achievements will outlast us all....
Join Terrell Owens' Special Club
We suppose, in a roundabout way, that it makes sense for fans of Terrell Owens to be fans of Terrell Owens, and Terrell Owens only; rooting for the team that your favorite player T.O. suits up for seems kind of beside the point....
Dhani Jones Has Happy Feet That Can't Be Beat
We have been called a "chronicler of athlete misdeeds," though we think we're a little more optimistic than that; we prefer "chronicle of athlete malfeasance." Or even "athlete tomfoolery." Whichever; pick your poison....
Why Do We Consider The NFL Fun Again?
Anyone who watched the NFL last season ended up captivated by two charismatic, outsized personalities: Clinton Portis and Chad Johnson. Every week, each did something creative, original and undeniably fun; we found ourselves rooting for their on-field exploits much more than we would have otherwis...
You Can Help Injure Terrell Owens. Please, Give All You Can.
Howard Eskin, a sports radio host in Philadelphia, is raising money in order to pay the fine for any Philadelphia Eagle who "takes out" Terrell Owens. The guy who sent in the tip didn't give a definition for "take out," but given the nature of the Philadelphia sports fan, I have to assume that a s...
Because Of Winn-Dixie
A tipster writes in to tell us about New Orleans Saints defensive end Jimmy Verdon's weekend. Evidently, he got hammered and ended up passed out on a bench in front of a Winn-Dixie and then brawled with the cops who tried to wake him up. Police spokesman Capt. James Gallagher explains....
How To Get Yourself Fired, In Two Seconds
Yesterday, St. Louis sports radio station KTRS fired host Dave Linehan after he used a racial slur to describe Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice. The mistake was accidental, but the station felt it had to fire him. We, uh, kind of hate racial slurs around here, but we feel obliged to repeat the ...
What Is A Lap Dance? You Know, In An Existential Sense, Aren't We All Just God's Lap Dancers?
So the Vikings sex boat trial in Minnesota is going on, like, right now. Well, kind of; former quarterback Daunte Culpepper and fullback Moe Williams are trying to talk a judge into dismissing charges against them. The two players were charged, pretty much, with receiving lap dances, which has spu...
New Mexico's Woes Continue
Bad Jocks has been all over this story, and they've got their confirmation from the NFL Draft Almanac: Apparently Marcus "New Mexico" Vick scored a lowly 11 on his Wonderlic test at the NFL combine last month. That's slightly better than Vince Young's badly graded score, but somehow still lower th...
Get Your T.O. Slice Of Funk
The official Terrell Owens Web site has been playing an odd game of hide-and-seek with its T.O. Cowboys rap. One minute it's on the site, the next minute it's off. We don't know what its deal is....