nfl Page 786 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

We've Given Maryland Football's Dramatic "Pride" Video An Earthquake Panic Remix
Before the season opener against Miami on Monday night, the Terps aired a promotional "Maryland Pride" video to fire up the home crowd and to display the Under Armour logo as many times as possible. The original included the Ravens' Torrey Smith—but not the part where he bolted for safer ground wh...

One Way To Get Coordinated Is To Stop Picking Your Nose
Your morning roundup for Sept. 7, the day we learned to see the positives in Tasers. H/T to Joe for the picky screen grab from NFL.com's fantasy home page. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Tim Tebow's Jersey Sales Are Down Because They're "All Out Of Size Sexy"
The Messiah Watch is officially on alert: Last week we learned that Tim Tebow's Broncos jersey—once record-setting—is only the tenth most popular in the NFL. This bright Denver man suggests that retailers must be "all out of size sexy"; another non-believer in KDVR's segment suggests it's because ...

Former Browns RB Arrested For Allegedly Driving His Car 147 Miles Per Hour
"Chris Jennings, who played in nine games for the Browns during the 2009 season and started a game at running back against Cincinnati that year, was taken into custody at 8:49 a.m. on September 4. A state trooper with the Cambridge Post of the Ohio State Highway Patrol caught Jennings' 2004 BMW tra...

Roger Goodell Enforces The Laws That Roger Goodell Came Up With Just Now
Jim Tressel followed in the footsteps of his protégé Terrelle Pryor by jumping to the NFL, and he's going to suffer silently on the sidelines along with him. Yesterday the Colts announced Tressel will sit out the first six weeks, a penalty that was self-imposed because the Commissioner's office was ...

A Reminder: Rick Reilly Promised To Eat Things Stuck In Your Carpet If Peyton Manning Didn't Start Game 1
Rick Reilly, Aug. 30: "Peyton Manning will keep his streak alive. If you think he's going to miss a start because of a neck problem, you've been chugging paint thinner. This guy hasn't missed a start since 1994 at Tennessee. Do you know how long ago it was when Manning didn't start for the Colts? Go...

ESPN's Fantasy Guru Thinks "Rapelisberger" Is Worth Having As Your QB
A reader named John helpfully screen-grabbed this tweet from ESPN fantasy expert Eric Karabell, which John said had appeared on the ESPN fantasy football page for a bit last night, at least until Karabell saw fit to delete it. Granted, Karabell was just answering a question about going with Vick or ...

Rob Ryan On Rex's Foot Fetish: "Naw, I Mean Hell, He Is A Little Freaky I Guess"
You may have read about the possible foot-fetish-filmin' proclivities of New York Jets head coach Rex Ryan. He likes feet, Deadspin told you last December, and then Wes Welker joked about it while Ryan wouldn't talk about it....

Jim Tressel Embarrasses Roger Goodell By Self-Imposing Goodell's Stupid Idea Of Justice
Has there ever been a string of punishments/non-punishments more baffling than Roger Goodell's recent run? Lacking a clear directive but wielding the personal-conduct policy like Zeus's discriminate lightning bolts, no one plays unless the Commish decides he's "ready," and the Commish doesn't have t...

Peyton Manning Will Likely Miss His First Career Start On Sunday
...And probably many more: "As a result of the most recent development the doctors have decided that Peyton will not practice. His participation therefore, in Sunday's game versus Houston will likely be doubtful... As was stated at the outset, it serves no useful purpose to speculate about hypotheti...

Watch An All-Male Dance Troupe Take The Field At Halftime Of The Saints/Titans Game
When it came to the Saints getting throttled by the Titans in the final preseason game of the year the other night, here's what one guy wrote:...

On Behalf Of Broncos Fans, The Denver-Area Real Estate Market Exacts Revenge On A Former Coach
"McDaniels just sold his 5,685 sqft Greenwood Village mansion for $1.95 mil ... HORRIBLE for Josh considering he bought the place for $2.5 mil back in 2009 just after he reportedly signed a 4-year, $8 mil contract with the Broncos." [TMZ: Photo H/T BroncosTalk]...

Wonder If This TCU Fan Still Wanted Some Loving After His Team Blew A Gigantic Comeback
Your morning roundup for Sept. 3, the day that Dragon Con's Comic Book Babes Costume Contest becomes an Elvira-hosted reality in Atlanta. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

We're Sick Of Joe Theismann All Over Again
It's difficult not to pity Redskins fans, who, in addition to being Redskins fans, have to hear Joe Theismann talk about preseason football during preseason television broadcasts. And last night, just after Brandon Banks ended an otherwise splendid punt return by flipping the ball out of his hand ...

MMA Fighter Has A More Racist Fantasy Football Team Than You
A small confession: I have often dreamed of creating a fantasy basketball team composed exclusively of players with the surnames Jefferson and Jackson. (The team, obviously, would be called the Jefferson-Jacksons, in reference, obviously, to the nascence of the Democratic Party.) Never have I dreame...

Fred Taylor Retires A Jaguar, But How Much Does His One-Day Contract Pay?
"There are no dumb questions." That was a promising way for the Jaguars' representative to open the conversation when he returns my call regarding what I presumed was a dumb, dumb question....

Whoever Broke Into Chris Cooley's Art Gallery Did Not Care Much For The Art
Local police in Leesburg, Va. are searching for the suspect that broke into Chris Cooley's art gallery on South King Street early Friday morning. Thankfully, no art or pottery was stolen in the burglary. More importantly, though, Chris Cooley owns an art gallery....

Matt Cassel's Burden Is Heavier Than Anyone Imagined
Your morning roundup for Sept. 2, the day after we didn't have any change to toss into Bruce Springsteen's guitar case. Photo courtesy @IndianPacker, via @Sportsfeeder1. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Michael Vick's $100 Million Contract Is A Lie
Everything you need to know about the NFL and its courtier press can be summed up in a single sentence: Michael Vick's much-heralded "$100 million deal" is not a $100 million deal, and the widely reported "$40 million guaranteed" is in fact neither $40 million nor completely guaranteed. ...

Terrelle Pryor's Wonderlic Score Was Reportedly A 7 (UPDATE: Pryor Says 22)
The Raiders are praying that Terrelle Pryor's football IQ is higher than his actual IQ. According to Bob McGinn, the Packers beat writer for the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, Pryor scored a whopping 7 on his Wonderlic Test. (UPDATE: See below.)...