nfl Page 988 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Man Like This Has No Business On A "Practice Squad"
Guess who's back everybody!...

The Last Time We're Gonna Talk About This Game
All right, we're gonna talk about this one more time, and then if you bring it up again, we're totally not giving you a cookie....

"The Bears Are Who We THOUGHT They Were!"
We're gonna talk a bit more about last night's Buzzsaw implosion a little later, but we really felt we had to start the day with coach Dennis Green — who is pretty obviously going to be fired before this season ends — putting forth one of the true great postgame press conference explosions. We still...

God, We Hate The Buzzsaw
It is a sublime pleasure, TOTALLY, for a national audience to see just exactly what life is like as a fan of The Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals. Jesus. Welcome to the desert, Matt....

Welcome To The NFL, Matty
Because everyone we talk to in St. Louis says it's been raining all day and is likely to rain all night, so we are less than optimistic that we'll see the NLCS Game 5 tonight. Therefore, we must receive our sporting fix tonight from Monday Night Football, or, as we like to call it, "Tony Kornheiser ...

NFL Roundup: Payton's Saints Run
News and notes from Week 6 in the NFL ......

NFL Week Six, Update #4
• NY Jets 20, Miami 10. There's really nothing left to be decided today, though I suppose Miami could pull off a comeback. But if they do, I probably couldn't even pretend to care. Chris Chambers just caught a touchdown pass to cut the lead to 10 in the fourth quarter, but I think it's asking a litt...

NFL Week Six, Update #3
• Jets 3, Dolphins 0. The NFL should step in and stop this game at halftime. It is a black mark on the entire league, their image, and their commitment to provide their fans with a quality product. Joey Harrington is 7-of-13 for 0 touchdowns and 2 interceptions. Chad Pennington has a total of 56 yar...

NFL Week Six, Update #2
• New Orleans 27, Philadelphia 24. The Eagles came out in the second half and just bumrushed the Eagles, but the Saints got a John Carney field goal with :03 on the clock for the win. Say what you want about the Eagles, but... without them, this season would've been a lot less interesting....

NFL Week Six, Update #1
• St. Louis 21, Seattle 7. In St. Louis, it's been all about Torry Holt, and Marc Bulger, perhaps the least-physically-threatening non-kicker in the National Football League. Holt already has six catches for 83 yards and two touchdowns, and Bulger has over 200 yards, and 2 TDs....

Week 6 NFL Preview: Attempts To Climb The Mountain
Philadelphia @ New Orleans. This game's sort of similar to the Seattle/St. Louis game, actually, except they aren't division rivals. But it's a young team that wasn't supposed to be this good, looking to jump and bite one of the established teams in the conference. They catch Philadelphia right af...

It's The Vikings' Bye Week!
Not sure if you noticed or not, but the Minnesota Vikings have a bye this week. And we all know what that means!...

Ethan Albright Is In Fact Able To Walk Upright
As Madden 07 obsessives know, Washington Redskins lineman and ginger kid Ethan Albright is the lowest-rated player in the game, with a rating that barely gives him enough aptitude to stand up and walk in something resembling a straight line. We have wondered if Albright knows about this, or cares, a...

The Buccaneers Want To Kill Carson Palmer (With Howie Mandel!)
Proving once again that no one is funnier than those who work for the official Web sites of professional football teams, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, in preparation for their game Sunday against quarterback Carson Palmer and the Cincinnati Bengals, have put together a little flash intro to their home...

Death Is Not An Option!
In a finding that should surprise no one who has every watched a sporting event, the American College of Emergency Physicians — every single organization in the country has a name that sounds fake, by the way — have discovered that male visits to the emergency room tend to increase directly after ...

We Can't Imagine The Minnesota Candidates In 20 Years
We don't know much about politics over here, but one thing we do know: We want our Secretarys of State to have banged some Green Bay Packers....

Lawrence Phillips Hits Bottom, Is Sure He Can Go Lower
And so in the end, Lawrence Phillips leaves us the way we always knew he would: receiving up to 20 years in prison for running into three kids with his car after a pickup football game. The former Cornhuskers /Rams /Dolphins /49ers /Bobcats /Alouettes /Stampeders /Dragons running back was convicte...

Hey, Anybody Hear Anything About Tiger Woods?
So, remember our Deadspin Pants Party Pick 'Em Pool? Well, hopefully you've been making your picks every week, because we're told we can give away some gifts....

Philadelphia's Day To Shine
On a day they'll talk about in Philadelphia for many years, the legendary lunatics that are Philly sports fans were in rare form yesterday for Terrell Owens' return to the city of liberty. These are our personal favorite four photos of the many we were sent....
