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NFL Week Eleven, Update #1
• Alright, it's time for an NFL update that you'll probably never see because the damn site is broken. I think the actual blogging software is rejecting the notion that Mike Tyson is now fucking for money... the blogging software is sad, and it doesn't feel like working today. I understand....

NFL Week 11 Preview: Emotional Returns
• Seeing Green. Center Casey Weigmann will have a familiar pair of hands nestled against his taint on Sunday as Trent Green returns to the Chiefs lineup. I personally felt like the job should've been Damon Huard's, as he's been playing so well. Now you've got an older quarterback coming off a major ...

Joe Namath Regrets Nothing!
So Joe Namath, heretofore known as The Guy Who Tries To Ruin A Perfectly Brilliant Moment With Talk Of Drinking "Problems," is out promoting his new book, "Namath," and during his "60 Minutes" interview this Sunday, he discusses the incident that, if nothing else, launched Kissing Suzy Kolber and ...

Where In The World Is Lil Ronnie?
So here's a question: Whatever happened to Lil Ronnie? Longtime Deadspin readers will remember Lil Ronnie, the 12-year-old from the "south side" of Indianapolis who serenaded his beloved Colts with "Super Bowl Bound," the hip-hop ode with the cityscape of Indy pulsing in the background. He was cute,...

Finally, NFL Coaches Showing Some Class Out There
Of all the long-extinct traditions we miss about the NFL, the practice of coaches wearing suits on the sidelines might be our most lamented. It made the game seem more epic, as if these were truly generals commanding men on the field of battle, if generals wore plaid ties and wore fedoras. It classe...

Emmitt Smith, You Are A Champion! The Emptiness Is Temporarily Gone!
It appears that American can finally release its collective tension: "Dancing With The Stars" has finally crowned a winner. And it's none other than ... Emmitt Smith! Yes, the former Cowboys (and Buzzsaw) running back emerged victorious last night, barely edging out Mario Lopez, and any contest in...

Not Surprisingly, The Buzzsaw Can't Even Do This Right
Last Sunday, during another grueling loss for The Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals, the halftime show at the University Of Phoenix Stadium intended to honor the late Pat Tillman, who was killed in Afghanistan in April 2004, with the retirement of his jersey on the stadium's Ring Of Honor. A spe...

We Can't Wait To See The Real Statue
With all the talk of Raiders receiver Randy Moss and his inability to turn his frown upside down, a significant event in the life of Mr. Moss has been overlooked: They're naming a college football award after him....

You Never Get A Second Chance To Make A First Impression
When you're a rookie heading into the cauldron that is the NFL, particularly when you might be replacing a future Hall of Famer, it's important to make as strong an impression as possible....

Not Exactly Thrilling NFL Action
We are always hesitant to grouse and grumble about the low excitement level of a particular NFL game and use it as an opportunity to make some larger statement about the game itself; one of the more random things about sports is that sometimes an individual game will just stink, and it's no reflecti...

Look, It's Football On Monday! At Night!
If you're the type of entirely hypothetical person whose fantasy team has degraded to the point that Steve Gradkowski is your starting quarterback — see that? We got our Kornheiser on right there — you might be particularly fired up for tonight's Monday Night Football game between the Tampa Bay Bucc...

The Joy Of The 2006 Skins
This video, captured yesterday, pretty sums up everything you need to know about the Washington Redskins' season so far. Careful, kids; you might need those brains someday. Though probably not....

NFL Roundup: Strange Thoughts In East Rutherford
News And Notes From Week 10 in the NFL....

NFC Supremacy Is Sort Of On the Line
There's a switch on Rex Grossman's back that goes from "Spectacular" to "Scott Mitchell," and it's not a dimmer switch. It's one or the other. So far this season, he's been Christ-like, or he's been Train Wreck Rex....

NFL Week Ten, Update #4
• The Raiders, and I probably shouldn't be so disappointed about this, couldn't seal the deal against the Broncos. No interceptions from Andrew Walter (weird) and 3 interceptions from Jake Plummer (not weird), and the Broncos are your winners. There were 109 total rushing yards... combined. Even the...

NFL Week Ten, Update #3
• Andrew Walter has so far completed more passes than he hasn't. And none of them were to Broncos or anything... no joke. He's 10-of-17 for 100 yards with no interceptions, and the Raiders are actually leading the Broncos. Of course, Jake Plummer sometimes makes that possible, all by himself. He's t...

NFL Week Ten, Update #2
• Seems like a lot of these games still have a way to go before being over. The Eagles/Redskins game is one of them, but in a manner of speaking, it's been over for quite some time. It's kind of a statement game for the Eagles and those who had written them off. Statement game for the Redskins, too,...

NFL Week Ten, Update #1
• The Titans are beating the hell out of the Ravens because they're racist. Travis Henry has displayed tremendous vision through his Klan hood, running for 78 yards and a touchdown. Vince Young has a rushing touchdown, Drew Bennett has 74 yards receiving, and the Ravens have been unable to run the b...

NFL Week 10 Preview: Cincinnati Police Force To Get Some Valuable Overtime
San Diego @ Cincinnati. You know, a lot of people like to look at this as a contest between two criminal-infested teams, but I don't think that's fair. At least, I think the Chargers have had cooler crimes. Steve Foley was shot by an idiot cop, Terrence Kiel was aiding in the production of the pur...

Own Pac-Man's Car!
As anyone who has dealt with the difficult nature of car salesmen, you sometimes just don't know whom to trust. Fortunately, there's one place you know you can find a good deal on all your automobile needs: Buying cars that were once owned by troubled NFL players and have now been repossessed and ...