nfl Page 989 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
NFL Week Five, Update #4
• This Cowboys/Eagles game isn't going to be over for a while... and it's certainly a contest worth watching, if you decided earlier that you didn't want to take part in the TO nonsense. It's not that bad... and it should be a hell of a finish....
NFL Week Five, Update #3
• It's been an entertaining game, but... I mean, nothing cool has happened with Terrell Owens. Is that how it's going to be, Eagles fans? Are you going to completely puss out? It's time for someone to take the initiative, storm the field, and at least... I dunno, hit the guy with a bucket of confett...
NFL Week Five, Update #2
• This game... it kinda sucked. Just one touchdown all day, and it's not like the defense was overwhelmingly great. The Washington Redskins that was supposed to be rounding into form is still not grasping all the pages of the 700-page playbook. They could muster only three points against the Giant...
NFL Week Five, Update #1
• The Tennessee Titans, eighteen-and-a-half point underdogs, could be in the process of pulling off the upset of the freakin' decade. They lead the Colts 10-0 at the half, behind a beautiful Vince Young touchdown run and a secondary that's held Peyton Manning to 56 yards, and Marvin Harrison without...
NFL Week Five: Something Crazy Better Happen
Bills @ Bears.This week's biggest storyline revolves around a guy who had some success with his former employer, and now, with his new team, is going to meet his former team for the first time... the hype surrounding Dick Jauron has been crazy this week....
Well, Look Who's Back!
That's right, folks: You thought the beat slowed down, but with Clinton Portis, the beat just don't slow down....
No One Doesn't "Just Say No" More Than The Bengals
For the Rob Gordons of the world out there, few experiences are more satisfying than sifting through old record bins. We once found that famous William Shatner car crash LSD record ... and that was just in our parents' basement....
The Steelers Know Their Bread And Butter
For all those who felt the infamous Ben Roethlisberger "Drink Like A Champion" pictures were some sort of bad publicity for the quarterback and the Steelers, we point out this display at a suburban Pittsburgh mall....
Your Thursday Morning NFL Roundup
"So, like, I text messaged Terrell to wish him well and everything after his overdose thingy, and he never texts me back. No biggie, right? But now he says he never got it! Like, I'm so sure! It's incredible th ... oh wait, that's Ashley on the other line. Be back in a sec."...
We Knew We Were Lame For Letting People With Tees Into Our Birthday Parties
All told, we realize now that our Sunday evening was rather sedate. (Chocolate milk, Fig Newtons and Diner Dash, now that you asked.)...
Philadelphia Prepares For Battle ... And It's Never Too Early
Apropos of nothing, we've decided to attach a picture of Donovan McNabb doing shots to this post. Forgive us....
For Those Who Like Their Sports Bouncy And Confusing
The sport is bossaball, and it's sweeping the nation (what nation, we have no idea). On second thought, judging from this video, it's possibly Brazil; because there's about a zillion shots of female bikini dancing and relatively little bossaball footage. From the bossaball web site:...
NFL Roundup: Orton Should Be Getting To Bed Right About ... Now
• So we actually stayed up and watched the full scale of the Bears' dismantling of the defending NFC champions last night, and we're pretty sure nobody's going to beat Chicago for quite a while. It actually hurt us to watch them hurt the Seahawks; everyone looked bigger, stronger, faster, meaner. ...
NFL Week Four, Update #4
• New England just ass-romped the Bengals. This was not something I had anticipated. The Patriots offense was struggling, their secondary was hurting, and I thought Carson Palmer and the Bengals wide receivers would take advantage. 'Twas not the case. Laurence Maroney gashed them all day, Corey Di...
NFL Week Four, Update #3
• The Raiders are confusing me. Maybe it's just because they're playing the Browns, but they're rolling. They got a touchdown from some damn linebacker who ran for a touchdown after Rueben Droughns politely handed him the football. And Lamont Jordan, who I actually thought passed away in the offse...
NFL Week Four, Update #2
• The Jets damn near pulled off the greatest play in the history of sports. It was one of those, "Hey, let's keep lateralling the ball and see what happens" deals that always ends in miserable failure, but this one last about seven minutes and made a hell of a lot of progress before finally peteri...
NFL Week Four, Update #1
• Drew Bledsoe and Terry Glenn have hooked up for two touchdowns, sending the message to Terrell Owens, "You know, we'd be fine if you did kill yourself. Owens himself has caught 3 balls for 73 yards, though he did drop a pass in the endzone. Kim Etheridge ran immediately onto the field and claime...
NFL Week Four Preview: Hello, Young Man
• Cowboys @ Titans. In one game, we've got the NFL starting debut of Vince Young, and the possible appearance of a guy who may or may have made an effort to feel the sweet release of death earlier in the week. How much more could you possibly need? When the Titans made the announcement, I wonder if ...
For Your Sunday Afternoon Viewing Pleasure...
First, your NFL Scoreboard....
And It's Like Nothing Ever Happened ... Presto!
So, now that the 9-1-1 call from publicist extraordinare Kim Etheredge has been made public and now that the police have ruled the incident an "accidental overdose," well, everything's back to normal now, right?...