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Why Did We Like Matt Christopher So Much? Introducing The Rebooted Deadspin Book Club
Sports has never been about, well, sports—at least not in fiction. Athleticism is moral worth. A slump is karma. Winning, losing: just metaphors. If the score's the only thing that matters, you might as well watch a real game....
Shia LaBeouf Wants You To Take Him Seriously
Being successful sure is nice, but what everybody really wants is to be taken seriously. Whether it's Woody Allen following up Annie Hall with the dour Interiors, George Michael turning away from the pop stardom of Faith for the confessional Listen Without Prejudice Vol. 1, or Robin Williams decidin...
Bill "Spaceman" Lee, Age 65, Threw A Complete Game Last Night
The high—and I do mean high—priest of baseball eccentrics hasn't pitched in the majors since 1982, but he's still out there, you know, man, and he's still pitching, 65 years young. Last night, the Spaceman took the mound for the San Rafael (Calif.) Pacifics of the independent North American League. ...
First, Kill All The Cyclists. <em>Premium Rush</em>, Reviewed.
1. It's difficult to overstate how much I dislike bicycle riders in New York City. (Collectively. I'm sure you, individual who rides his/her bike, are perfectly pleasant and normal ... when you're not on your bike.) Bike riders have taken over this city, and they are, almost entirely across the boar...
Mike Birbiglia's <em>Sleepwalk With Me</em> And The Art (And Agony) Of Stand-Up Comedy
I'm in awe of stand-up comics....
The Genius Of <em>Enemy Of The State</em>, Tony Scott's Best Film
In the reaction to the sudden death of Tony Scott, a quick consensus emerged: Scott was a more interesting director than he'd been given credit for throughout his career; Top Gun and his general style helped usher in the age of Michael Bay and Olivier Megaton-ism; and the one movie everyone could ag...
Counterpoint: Aw, Screw Ryan Lochte
Yesterday Sean headed off the typical pile-on after an athlete misstep by contextualizing Ryan Lochte as, rather than the preeminent dumb jock of our time, just the latest in a long line of tacky and oblivious athlete-mannequins that have always been around. Not a parable, not a lesson—just another ...
What To Make Of Ryan Lochte
"It's like having a pet dog for a long time. You get attached to it, and when it dies you miss it."...
Your <em>Expendables 2</em> Power Rankings
The Expendables 2 has 11 names on its poster only because there is not room, either in poster space or running time, for 47. It is New Years Eve with testicles. It is the turducken of action movies. Rather than review the film, I thought I'd just rank those 11 names, in ascending order of Expendable...
Former Columnist And Accused Child Molester Bill Conlin "Enjoying His Retirement" At Undisclosed Location, His Lawyer Says
Bill Conlin's long career as a sports columnist for the Philadelphia Daily News came to a sudden end last December when three women and a man told the Philadelphia Inquirer he had molested them as children. Authorities determined the allegations against him were credible, but that the incidents were...
Ryan Lochte Had A Tough Time Learning His Lines For His Cameo On <em>90210</em>
Ryan Lochte, gold-medal-winning aquatic bro. You've heard of him. 90210, so-so CW reboot of iconic 90s teen soap Beverly Hills 90210. It's probably less likely that you've heard of it, especially given that its cast consists of Shenae Grimes and a bunch of afterthoughts. (Grimes ditched the vastly s...
<em>Compliance</em>: A Grierson & Leitch Conversation About Pranks, Coercion, And Blowjobs
Compliance, which opens Friday, was one of the most debated movies at the 2012 Sundance Film Festival. Starring Dreama Walker (now better known for Don't Trust the B—— in Apartment 23) and written and directed by Craig Zobel, it's a psychological thriller about an Ohio fast-food joint that becomes t...
Let's Save Jesse Eisenberg's Career
It hasn't been a good week for Jesse Eisenberg. On Sunday, when the cameras caught him watching Team USA's gold medal win over Spain, the broadcasters thought he was actually Mark Zuckerberg. On Wednesday, he "contributed" an "essay" to Dave Eggers' "90 Days, 90 Reasons" site that couldn't have made...
Interview With The Vampire. <em>Cosmopolis</em> (Starring Robert Pattinson), Reviewed.
Rage is rarely cold. Whether it's the Tea Party or Occupy Wall Street or Network, discontent with the state of the world usually comes to us piping hot, often satisfyingly so. That's why it's so disconcerting when a movie goes the opposite route, serving up its message with a calm, dispassionate air...
Marvin Lewis Called Rex Ryan To Beg Him Not To Use Tebow In The Wildcat
This little nugget comes buried in the fourth paragraph of a preseason game writeup....
Did The Wrong Thing. Spike Lee's <em>Red Hook Summer</em>, Reviewed.
Spike Lee is such a confident filmmaker that when one of his movies doesn't quite work, you almost wonder if it's your fault for not getting it. Secure in his talent for sweeping emotions and powerful visuals, he sets out to make a masterpiece with each new movie, and the worst thing you can say abo...
The Red Sox Are Losing Because John Lackey Likes To Double-Fist Beers, Writes Moron
The Red Sox lost a baseball game last night, dropping their record to three games below .500, and you know what that means, don't you? It's time for some dumb columnist to turn into Carrie Nation and throw some shit at the wall. CSN New England's Joe Haggerty did just that when he published this ar...
"I Would Like To Extend You A Counter-Offer To Suck My Dick": A Rejected Jobseeker Sends The Padres The Best Letter Ever
Taylor Grey Meyer estimates that she applied for a job with the San Diego Padres at least 30 times since moving to Coronado, Calif. Initially, in the sales office; but as she was alternately rejected and ignored, she lowered her sights. This past March, she applied for a minimum-wage job selling tic...
Zach Galifianakis And Will Ferrell Race To The Middle. <em>The Campaign</em>, Reviewed.
1. That The Campaign could never come up with a fictional scenario that would rival the absurdity of what actually happens in our daily political discourse is an obvious point, yet one that needs to be made again nevertheless. Is any sort of shtick that Will Ferrell could dream up odder than a reali...
The Conspiracy To Kill A Great Movie Franchise. <em>The Bourne Legacy</em>, Reviewed.
1. The first three Jason Bourne films had an intensity, a vitality to them that made them feel urgent and relevant, grounded in the messy real world of global capitalism and a U.S. government that was alternately confused, corrupt, and terrified. The movies didn't have a specific politics other than...