no Page 5644 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Hello, Barber, I Think I'd Like The 'Hobo Antennae' Today
I'm very hesitant to say the soccer season is over, because I know one of Deadspin's readers will chime in and correct me with, "How silly of you ignorant Americans to forget about the Antarctic World Cup, and it's called football, unlike your football, where you don't even use your feet!" And they'...
Wait, They Traded Blue Moon Odom?
It's not very gratifying to be traded for an inanimate object. Unless my ex-girlfriend breaking up with me so she could spend more time with her vibrator counts, I have no idea what it must feel like to be traded for 10 baseball bats....
Spurs-Lakers: First Blood, Part II
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who's starting to get a very bad feeling about these playoffs. A very bad feeling. When he's having nightmares about another Lakers championship, he can be found crafting Kobe Bryant voodoo dolls at Basketbawful. Enjoy! When you're pushed, killin's as easy...
At Least One Jew Went On To Become A Video Game Superhero
There might be a perfectly reasonable explanation behind my false sense of superiority. I blame today's retro video game pick, Solomon's Key. You see, every five levels or so were grouped together by a sign of the Zodiac. It started with Aries and moved forward. Aquarius, my birth mascot, was one of...
It's Delicious, It's Flavorful, It's The Everything Closer
See this everything bagel? No, you can't eat it. After all, it's just on a computer screen, and that would be foolish, even for you. Although your request to take a bite right now lets me know that you, too, believe in the power of the everything bagel. So today we're going to channel that untapped ...
About Last Night
What you missed while watching the most realistic portrayal of Helen Keller ever…...
Commence Memorializing In An Approrpriate Manner Right Now
• Barkley admits he has a gambing problem. Kind of. • Softball ladies no longer have to resemble Drew Carey • Bill Simmons continues to fulminate • Chris Cooley: Almost married man • Basketbawful has been killing the NBA playoff coverage • Minor Enterprise is definitely hitting its stride • He...
Souvenirs, Novelties, Party Tricks
We've tried everything: the embassy, the German government, the consulate. We even talked to the U.N. ambassador. It's no use, we just can't bring our wife to orgasm....
Vince Young Is Doing It For The Kids, You See
Well, this is exciting. Tennessee Titans quarterback and part-time shirtless dancing zombie has come out and apologized for those photos that popped up online last week. Young explained himself to the throngs of Tennessee media after practice on Thursday....
A Strictly Business-Like Examination Of The Women's French Open Contenders And Their Respective Tawdry Photos
For those of you out there who are fans of yellow fuzzy balls bouncing off of clay courts, the French Open at Roland Garros begins this weekend. This is the favorite surface of Rafael Nadal and his exposed biceps, but those types of examinations can be found elsewhere online....
Perhaps One Of These Men Could Fight Jose Canseco
I'm having a tough time figuring out whether these photos of terrifying looking bodybuilders are actual real-live human beings or the product of some sort of anti-steroid ad campaign. If these men were racehorses, they'd probably snap their ankles on the way to the urinal and have to be euthanized....
Watching Willie Randolph's End Of Days
The speculation surrounding Mets' manager Willie Randolph's chances of survival once he returns back to the not-so-cozy confines of Shea has reached an all-time high. You can't read anything about the Mets embattled manager without a forboding headline attached to it and the Mets' brass has been ret...
This Is Much Easier Than E-Mailing
Hey! Who's handling the editing duties this weekend? Would the party in charge please step forward and drop me a line....
Is Baseball Ready For Its Closeup?
As much as I dislike the idea of umpires with their heads stuck under black hoods to make games even longer, the momentum of force and time may finally be giving baseball instant replay whether we like it or not. Thank you, umpires, for being so consistently, stupidly wrong on outfield home runs cal...
Canadian Lady Sports Anchor Is A Hockey Expert In All Of Its Various Forms
Obviously, these Media Approval Rating things seem to be extremely popular with many readers far and wide over the vast ball-filled spectrum of the wild and woody sports blogosphere....
Danny Ainge's Roots
Here's an interesting little tidbit found by Portland Trailblazers blog infantryman Benjamin Golliver at Blazers Edge. It's a couple of grafs taken from the 1991 book "Against The World", which followed the 1991 Blazers' quest for an NBA title. (The ghost of Jerome Kersey haunts us all.)...
Broom With A View
Their logo is politically incorrect, their manager is a noted wife puncher and their broadcasters are notorious homers, and I mean all of that in the nicest possible way. But today there is no denying the unstoppable force that is the Atlanta Braves, who completed a four-game sweep of the New York ...
Home Is Where The Heartache Is
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who very highly suggests seeing the new Indiana Jones movie. When he's not laughing at how Gregg Popovich has Tim Duncan by the balls, he can be found marvelling at the crotch-grabbing antics of the Spurs-Lakers series at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...
About Last Night
What you missed while wrestling a deer in a hair salon ... • NBA, MLB: Pistons and Tigers both win on the same day? What?? • NHL: Tony Granato is back as coach of the Avalanche, begging the question, why did he leave in the first place? • NASCAR: Kyle Busch earns pole for Coca-Cola 600, has interact...
Dusty Basketball Courts Far, Far Away
Even though I promised an alarming amount of irreverence for most of today, it would be unconscionable of me not to sendTrue Hoop genius Henry Abbott as many eyeballs as humanly possible over to his story, "Infantry Hoops in Iraq." Afer he inquired about the amount of basketball being played by some...