on Page 6308 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Roman Abramovich's Fantasy Football Team Is Better Than Yours
Apparently Roman Abramovich doesn't like being first runner-up. After completing the silver sweep last season—finishing second in the Premier League, the Carling Cup, and the Champions League—the Russian billionaire owner of Chelsea FC responded by purchasing half of the Portuguese-speaking world. F...

LPGA English-Only Policy: Here Come the Lawyas
As if public displeasure were not strong enough against the LPGA's proposed English-only policy, now lawyers have arrived on the scene to pronounce the policy potentially illegal. Really? Potentially illegal. Every lawyer loves this legal analysis. Everything is potentially illegal. The answer to e...

College Football Previews: #2 USC
"JP is the founder of Pyle of List, where he toils alongside 3 men that are superior writers, passionate sports lovers and respected friends. He's a USC alum, college football enthusiast and Pac-10 apologist. He also contributes to National Lampoon's Zaz Report but isn't responsible for any of thei...

Alex Rodriguez And The Art Of The Double Play
Let it be known that the Yankees officially succumbed in the AL East last night; time of death 10:27 p.m., EST. It was all Alex Rodriguez's fault, of course. The only question is, what shall we call him after his 0-for-5 performance in a 7-3 loss to the Red Sox? Boo-Rod? A-Flop? A-Rod And Out? A-Wad...

NFL Season Preview: Arizona Cardinals
We're less than two weeks away from the start of the NFL season, so it's time to start the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous other walks of life whom consider football the only sport worth watching. Today: The Buzzsaw Tha...

Michael Strahan's Life Became A Whole Lot Easier In More Ways Than One
Perhaps this is what he meant when he said he was enjoying retirement and declined to rejoin the Giants. You'll recall that Strahan and his wife entered into a rather stormy split. Included, among other things, were allegations that Strahan was gay. In the end, Strahan's wife, Jean Strahan, receive...

That's It World; You Have Disrespected Jay Mariotti For The Final Time
Details are beginning to trickle in on Jay Mariotti's sudden resignation from the Land of Newsprint, and it's pretty much what you would expect: Jay quitting in a hissy fit over a perceived slight. According to two reliable sources, Mariotti, just back from Beijing, wanted to write a column on Barac...

Through The Looking Glass With Nine-Year-Old Jericho Scott
The parents of Jericho Scott, the nine-year-old New Haven, Conn. pitcher who was banned from pitching because he is too good, are officially suing the youth league that is disbanding his team. In response, the league held a press conference to tell their side of the story, and a huge mob of reporter...

This Is Why Rock Fights Are Fun
So, there was this predictable exchange between the front desk guy in my apartment building and another guy as I went out to grab some smokes while the Phillies were down 7-1 in the 4th inning last night to the Mets. "Of course they'd come down to earth. Take 4 from the Dodgers then they get blown o...

Presenting The Unbreakable Wooden Bat. Pedro Cerrano Approves
First man split the atom, then he invented the toaster pastry, and now this: A New Jersey man has developed the first unbreakable wooden bat. Ward Dill, an MIT graduate, put his Radial Bat through the paces on Tuesday, promising that it will never shatter, will not make that annoying "ping" sound, a...

Morning Blogdome: Aaron Rodgers Still Can't Escape The Ghost
• Whatever doesn't humiliate you makes you stronger: "Not only is Aaron Rodgers filling Favre's shoes, he's also wearing his number! Of course, this was just for a drill in practice, but clearly the Packers have moved on and shouldn't expect much of a drop off, if any, this season." [Stock Lemon] • ...

Jay Mariotti: Quits Chicago Sun-Times Before Struggling Newspaper Business "Takes Him Down With It"
Wow. Based on the enormous amount of emails flooding Deadspin's inbox, you would've thought that there was an assassination of a beloved sports figure or a towering inferno at Yankee Stadium. Nope. The reason for the deluge was because Jay Mariotti, after 17 years of vituperative hackdom, has decide...

Thoughts On MLB Replay, Kruk On Little League Baseball And The First Place Phillies
Each weekday morning Awful Announcing, video slash and grab extraordinaire of the sports blogosphere, gives us a visual rundown of everything you missed from the night before. If there's something sports-related you'd like to see with your coffee, shoot him an e-mail and let him know....

Larry Brown's 9/11 Memories Darken The Redeem Team's Triumphant Gold Medal Victory
As a Philadelphian, I will always forgive Larry Brown for many of the egotistical brainfarts he's committed in his loooong and well-traveled coaching career for the rejuvenation period he brought to the Sixers when he coached here .(His 2001 Sixers team will always be one of the most revered ones in...

ESPN Going Inside the Sperm Bank
Suffering from an Olympic letdown? Not willing to watch the Democratic Convention? Well, ESPN would like to take you inside the world of athlete sperm on E:60. Yep, tonight at 7 eastern, it's Sperm U. ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after just another typical Deadspin pants party ... • MLB: Chicago Cubs at Pittsburgh (7 p.m., ET). Not mentioned: Barack Obama also prefers the Pirates to the Cubs. [WGN] • Tennis: U.S. Open, men's and women's first round, at New York (7 p.m., ET). If sitting in a parked car outside o...

College Football Previews: #3 Ohio State
Today's preview is brought to us by Matt from Buckeye Commentary. We're just two days away from kickoff. Is your blood not pounding at the thought of Oregon State-Stanford? STRENGTHS Stiff-arm delivering running back? Check. Best cover corner in college football? Check. Sick linebackers and the nat...

Afternoon Blogdome: Chris Mortensen's Arizona Job Security In Jeopardy
• But Leinart's starting job is still safe for now: "Do we have a quarterback? ... It seems like Chris Mortensen is making the decision on our quarterback for our football team. ... But nothing has changed," [Arizona Cardinals' Coach Ken]Whisenhunt said. [Sporting Blog] • I'm sure it's pronounced "R...

Mr. Met Sez: Damn It Feels Good To Be A Gangsta
If there's one thing I've learned in this world, it's that you do not f—- with Mr. Met. He has a bad attitude and a collection of shivs he made in prison, so watch out. Just look at this photo, where Mr. Met is saying "Don't f—- with my hos, or I will STICK YOU, man!" And witness the video following...

UCLA Calls Out USC in Full-Page Los Angeles Times Ad
Give Rick Neuheisel credit, he's not dodging the competition. He's already announced he's making a run at snatching Snoop Dogg away from USC and now he's pointing in their direction in newsprint!. Who said papers were dead? Not to be outdone with ancient relics of communication trash talk, USC imme...