out Page 159 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

UFC 118: The Wit And Wisdom Of James Toney, MMA's New Big Swinging Freak Show
James Toney may get thumped tonight by Randy Couture at UFC 118, but he's already triumphed in the promotional battle in customary fashion — by sounding like a drunk Clubber Lang practicing the dozens inside a dumpster....

Lil Wayne Loves Him Some Maria Sharapova
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

La Russa, Pujols Will Apolitically Attend Glenn Beck's Totally Apolitical Rally
Can we all agree by now that the allegedly thoughtful Tony La Russa, who maybe you've heard is a lawyer and who walks the earth cogitating profoundly on such matters as lineup construction and puppies, is really just an all-around paste-eating dumbass?...

Real-Life Lady Football Coach Story Not Going As Well As Lady Football Coach Movie
Natalie Randolph is a woman. But she's also a high school football coach in Washington D.C. Is your mind blown yet? It shouldn't be. We've been here before....

Jose Bautista Wants Everyone To Know That Jose Bautista Does Not Take Steroids
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Blue Jays slugger Jose Bautista....

Care To See What A Female Tennis Player's Musculature Looks Like In Slow-Motion?
As part of their examination into how "power" has transformed women's tennis, the Times included a video gallery of several players returning volleys in slow-motion. It's as neat as it is intimidating and shaming. [NYT]...

Miami University Cracking Down On Poopy, Pukey Sorority Parties
Miami University fraternities and sororities will be forced to hire security and designate "sober monitors" at Greek events this year. Why, oh, why would such drastic measures be needed you ask?...

Jay Mariotti Free on Bail After About 12 Hours in the Clink (With 10:45 p.m. Mugshot Update)
From the LA Times: ESPN personality and sports columnist Jay Mariotti was released from jail on $50,000 bail Saturday, hours after being arrested on suspicion of felony domestic assault, authorities said....

Last Night's Loser: Drama-Loving U.S. Open Fan, Third Row
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Here's Why Canada Should Lose its Baseball Privileges (Tha Remix)
Just when I thought the instant-classic "Brent Bowers Grabs Ankles, Repeatedly Calls Openly Gay Ref a Faggot" routine would be the last post about Edmonton-involved baseball, along came Thursday's Edmonton East Park Orioles game....

Dead Wrestler's Society Accepts New Member
Lance McNaught, aka former WWE wrestler Lance Cade or Garrison Cade, died Friday morning in San Antonio. He'd apparently been taken to the hospital for trouble breathing on Tuesday but asked to be released Wednesday....

This Is Probably Not Matt Kemp's Penis
Despite MediaTakeOut trumpeting this as the Dodgers outfielder choking up on his swing, we're dubious. And we've seen some athlete dong in our day....

Coach, Parents Brawl At Junior High Football <u>Practice</u>
It's your typical coach-hits-kid, kid's-father-calls-police, parents-start-throwing-punches story. And it's all thanks to one young RB running the wrong way during handoff drills....

After Photography Ban, Soccer Game Covered By Cartoonist
League One side Southampton banned all photographers from their stadium for this weekend's match. The visiting team's newspaper handled it well, reducing the comical situation to, well, a comic....

If Tebow's Tithing, the Lord Made <em>Bank</em> Off Nike Yesterday
I don't know what's more frightening: That someone wrote 314 words about an epic yet unfulfilling Hajj to get his hands on the new Tim Tebow kicks or that I read all 314 words....

The Trick Shot Controversies Continue
The semantics battle between trick-shot crews continues today after news surfaced of a third claimant to the "world's farthest/longest/other synonym" shot title. Meet the corn-pone spitfires that make up the East Side trick-shot crew....

I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream For Free Readings
Hey, New Yorkers: it's time for another portion of Gelf magazine's Varsity Letters series of free readings. Tonight at 7:30: gambling, bodybuilding, and The Girl Who Struck Out Babe Ruth. That's 7:30, DUMBO, and free....

Startling Penalty Miss Alert: Spanish Second Division Edition
Mind doctors will tell you that the key to a decent penalty is a technique called "positive visualisation". Mehmet Aurelio is not at the forefront of this practice....

Trick Shot Off Vulcan Monument Mired In Controversy
According to YouTube, this is the farthest basketball shot of all time. The makers of this video, The Legendary Shots, are in a pissing contest with another trick shot crew, Dude Perfect over semantics and that superlative. Unnecessary squabbling ahead!...