ow Page 1060 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Terrell Owens Might Have A Future In This Film Business
So, remember that Terrell Owens porn film cameo that had everyone up in arms? Owens' representatives desperately tried to make everyone take it down — us included — and did all they could to sweep it under the rug. But is Owens more involved with the porn world than we thought? A recent interview wi...
To Watch Tonight
What you missed while riding the giant NSFW mechanical bucking penis ... • Arena Football: Philadelphia at Georgia (8 p.m., ET). Welcome to Duluth, bitches. [ESPN2] • MLB: Boston at Minnesota (7 p.m., ET). Come see a sporting event in the only building named after a man named Hubert. [ESPN] • NBA: E...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while modifying your flatscreen with a burlap frame......
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after finishing your Little Golden Book ... • Boxing: Junior welterweights, Mike Arnaoutis vs. Lanardo Tyner, at Atlantic City, (10 p.m., ET, same-day tape). Hey, I was going to name my son Lanardo! [ESPN2] • NBA: Western Conference semifinals, Game 3, Los Angeles Lakers at Utah Jazz (...
Somewhere, A Haitian Boy Is Hatless
Here's a photo from a reader who found this rare, 19-0* New England Patriots Super Bowl hat at a 99-cent store in Brooklyn....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after reading your kids a bedtime story ... • NBA: Eastern Conference semifinals, Game 2, Cleveland at Boston (7 p.m., ET); Western Conference semifinals, Game 3, New Orleans at San Antonio (9:30 p.m., ET). We welcome our new Hornets overlords. I can be helpful in finding people to toi...
THE CHRIS FARLEY SHOW by Tom Farley, Jr., and Tanner Colby
Come and read the raucous, heartfelt, and heartbreaking story of a man who lived to make us laugh, and died trying—featuring over 100 new interviews with David Spade, Chris Rock, Lorne Michaels, Alec Baldwin, and many more. CHECK OUT AN EXCERPT AND ENTER TO WIN A COPY OF THE BOOK....
Gamecock And Blowie, Together At Last
Of course you all know the University of South Carolina Gamecock, pictured at left. But you may not be familiar with Blowie, the mascot of the Columbia Blowfish of the Coastal Plain League (the only costumed mascot who is deadly poisonous if not properly cooked). I'm not sure of the circumstances w...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after the Festival of Nudity ... • Boxing: Super bantamweights, Mike Oliver vs. Reynaldo Lopez, at Boston (9 p.m., ET). If Lopez wins, what am I going to do with this Mike Oliver ringtone? [ESPN2] • MLB: Cleveland at New York Yankees (7 p.m., ET). Lee vs. Wang ... Game On! [ESPN] • NBA...
Shout At The Dogleg
It's no secret that former hair metal icons began replacing their Aqua Net and sperm-killing lyrca with Tommy Bahama wardrobes as soon as most of them hit their 30s. Alice Cooper's like a five handicap, Tico Torres from Bon Jovi's 12.1, and, hey, even Tommy Lee's a 33....
Guys And Dolls: Floyd, White Sox Back On Top
The inflatable sex doll community was shocked on Tuesday night when Chicago's Gavin Floyd once again lost a no-hitter in the late going; giving up a double to the Twins' Joe Mauer with one out in the ninth. (Inset: "Nooooo!"). Bobby Jenks came on to get the final two outs in the White Sox's 7-1 vic...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after giving acupuncture to Portland ... • NBA: Eastern Conference semifinals, Game 1, Cleveland at Boston (8:15 p.m., ET). Now it gets interesting. Papa John's Pizza, anyone? [TNT] • MLB: Indians at Yankees (7:10 p.m., ET). Drew Carey approves. [WKYC] [Yes Network] • Movie: Batman Beg...
White Sox Locker Room Is Not A Safe Environment For Women, Real Or Inflatable
Ozzie Guillen and the White Sox are now in the midst of being criticized (again) by some sports writers and the Association For Women In Sports Media for their creative blow-up doll, slump-busting shrine. The Association said said the shrine creates an "uncomfortable" environment for female sports w...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you put the finishing touches on your beer can coffin ... • Arena Football: Chicago at Tampa Bay (8 p.m., ET). Storm's a-brewin'. [ESPN2] • MLB: Boston at Detroit (7 p.m., ET). This matchup looked pretty bland two weeks ago. Now, I'm looking forward to it. [ESPN] • NBA: Eastern Conf...
Ozzie Guillen Does A Brilliant Ozzie Guillen Impersonation
Perhaps it's appropriate that Ozzie Guillen would unleash one of his patented expletive-filled tirades on Chicago fans, the Cubs, and media outlets just a few short days removed from the 25th anniversary of Lee Elia's epic f-bomb ranting. Maybe it was an homage. But more likely it was just Ozzie Gui...
Who's Sorry Now? Rocket Edition
Nowhere in the recorded history of regret has there been a more hang-dog expression than this. Hasn't Roger Clemens suffered enough? Just look at him. The round head that reminds you of the boulder that chased Indiana Jones. The pale skin that reminds you of the moon. The furrowed brow where he keep...
The Buzz Bissinger Affair, In Song (And I Feel Fine)
It's The End Of Sports News As We Know It [YouTube]...
On Race, Message Boards And Shutting The Hell Up
Of all the panels on "Costas Now" the other night, the one we thought was most effective at tickling the cerebral cortex was the last one, about race, featuring Cris Carter, Michael Wilbon and Jason Whitlock. (It was so absorbing that "Costas Now" is doing a full 90-minute segment just on race down ...
Tim Tebow Has A Steady Hand, We Hope
Florida quarterback Tim Tebow is an amazing, versatile quarterback, able to chuck a pass 50 yards, turn the corner and a linebacker and plow over undersized defensive lineman. He's a Renaissance Man, a do-gooder, a man of America. His skills run deep. How deep? Trust us, you don't want to know....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while doing a little post-Derby laundry... • Sunday Night Baseball: St. Louis Cardinals vs. Chicago Cubs. Finally, an end to the early May logjam atop the NL Central! [ESPN] • Drag Racing: NHRA Midwest Nationals, Final Eliminations from Madison, IL. This midwestern bias is getting out...