pee Page 14 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
On My Honeymoon, I Kept Seeing A Flabby, Neck-Braced Kaka
You probably know Kaka as the superstar midfielder for Brazil and Real Madrid. Maybe you'll remember him as the cover boy of FIFA 11....
The Comeback Pig: Marv Albert, And How To Survive Any Sex Scandal
This month, Marv Albert celebrated his 70th birthday and joined the NFL on CBS. He announced he would leave his gig calling Nets games for the YES Network—he wouldn't have the time. The CBS job "wasn't something I was looking for," Albert said. Marv, at 70, is sports' most sought-after voice, so muc...
The Story Of The Porta-Potty Peeping Tom Has Been Animated
So yeah, some guy hid in the receiving end of a Colorado yoga-festival Porta-Potty and up-peeped. This is the type of crime that should be told through animation, of course, and animation that concludes as if it was poetry: "A man covered in feces and cuts on his back and legs was seen fleeing the...
A Special Graduation Message To The Class of 2011
Every year, thousands of young Americans graduate from college. And every year, those poor wretched hungover bastards are forced to sit out in some quad in million-degree heat to listen to a mildly famous person yammer on and on for hours about how these kids will change the world and all that bulls...
Maple Leafs' Swedish Goalie Prospect Is A Terrible Rapper
Toronto signed Mark "In Da Park" Owuya, a 21-year-old goalie prospect from Sweden, to an entry-level contract on Thursday. Last season, Da Park had a 2.18 goals-against average and a .927 save percentage in goal for Djurgarden, of the Swedish Elite League....
This Man Stole $24,000 From A Pee Wee Football League
"The Long Beach Football League is for kids ages five to 12. According to its website, the league's mission is 'to instill the fundamental values of self-discipline, teamwork, leadership, sportsmanship, and mutual respect to the youth of our community.'" And for padding the pockets of 51-year-old Ja...
Jim Tressel's Profound Pauses Not As Profound As He Intends Them To Be: A Video Compilation
Jim Tressel, the recently/somewhat disgraced football coach at Ohio State, spoke to the press last night. Mostly, though, instead of saying actual words, he gazed out into the crowd during pregnant pauses in his speech. And Shatner he is not....
At Denny's, They Will Clean Your Table While You Continue Brawling (NSFW) (UPDATED)
UPDATE: Well, the original video was taken down overnight for YouTube service-terms violations. Thankfully, someone else was taping. And double thankfully, syrup appears to be involved in the impetus. (H/T Dylan for the extended remix version.)...
If This Packer Fan Is Indeed Drinking His Own Urine, This Video Might Be Really Gross
Or it might be apple juice; who knows. Either way, that he wants the world to believe he's going all Bear Grylls with his own piss shows an impressive commitment to the team....
Peerless Price Is Not Exactly In Hiding
The I-Team had received a few cryptic reports on Peerless Price's whereabouts, after we put out a call to help this nice attorney who's trying to foreclose on his house. But I think we were able to pin him down....
Speedskater Shani Davis' Two-Year Winning Streak Ends
The last time U.S. speed skater Shani Davis lost a 1000-meter race was Dec. 6, 2008 in China. Until today, in Japan....
Searching For...Peerless Price
An attorney by the name of W. Anthony Collins has called on the I-Team to help locate the former Vols/Bills/Falcons/Seahawks/Cowboys wide receiver. He's vanished, you see....
Is This Pee-Wee Team Running A Fumblerooski Or Just Bad At Football?
The Southaven, Miss., Broncos were leading 25-0 and well on their way to winning a recent game when they lined up for the extra point. What happened next might have been poor sportsmanship or a broken play....
Niche Sports Romance Goes All Soap Opera
Olympic speed-skater Joey Cheek dumped billionaire heiress Georgina Bloomberg (NYC's mayor's daughter) while she was in the hospital recovering from a show-jumping accident. Concussion, fractured vertebra, broken heart. [NY Post]...
Monkeys Will Sell Programs, Hear Complaints About Jobs At Today's NASCAR Race
Their names are Rocky and Miki and they're the size of your average housecat. From noon until 2 p.m., they'll be selling souvenir programs at Texas Motor Speedway....
Chad Ochocinco's Pregnant Pigeon Saga Was A Bald-Faced Lie
This...this is pretty much the most blatant betrayal in the history of sports. We've all watched, rapt, as Ochocinco's pregnant pigeon escaped, returned, and finally gave birth. But we were all hoodwinked by Chad's dastardly deception. J'accuse!...
John Salley Story Corner: Rookie Hazing, Bad Boy Style
Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: A rookie gets the treatment....
Bo Pelini Is Pissed In Both Senses Of The Word
Please cast your eyes to the crotch of Coach's pants, which appear to be running a spread offense of their own. [ESPN, H/T Bryan C.]...
The Messiah College Lady's Soccer Team Will Not Tolerate Peeping Toms
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
An Open Letter To Soccer Player Charlie Davies (With Afternoon Update)
Charlie, What the fuck are you doing? Listen, more than most people, I get how surviving near-death incidents involving cars can change a person. It makes you grateful each morning when you wake up....