playoffs Page 207 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
At Last, Nash And Nowitzki, Together Again
While trying to find video of a time when Mavericks coach Avery Johnson's voice was deep — we imagine it just one day rising, like reverse puberty — we came across this apparent promotional video for the Mavs. "The Avery Bunch" are heading to the Western Conference Finals, where they will face the P...
Hasselhoff, Nowitzki Lead Mavs Past Spurs
Boy, man, is Mark Cuban's billion-dollar penis ever gonna come out and play tonight....
It's Western Conference March Madness
We know a few people, Midwesterners, mostly, sometimes with their own little biases, who claim to love college basketball but are left cold by the NBA. We don't understand this, but even they can't deny the beauty of tonight: Two games, both elimination, winners play each other in the conference fin...
LeBron Finally Runs Out Of Magic Dust
As much as we loved the idea of LeBron James swooping from the heavens and lifting his team, all by his lonesome, into the conference finals and beyond, yesterday's easy win by the Pistons was pretty much inevitable. When you team is essentially just one player, and that one player scores only six p...
No, I'm Sorry, You Can't Get A Witness
A competitive first half gave way to a Detroit smothering in the second half, and the Detroit Pistons have advanced in the Eastern Conference playoffs. LeBron James had 27 total, but was held to just 6 points in the second half. Of course, those 6 points did account for over 25% of the Cavs total ...
This Feels... Big.
The Pistons and Cavs will be tipping off any minute now. I can't be sure of what, but we're about to witness something. I think just about everyone in the universe is rooting for the Cavs, with the exception of hardcore Pistons fans. Everyone either wants to see LeBron win, or wants to see LeBron...
And The Ones Get Sevens...
Screw "About Last Night!" After a night of basketball like that, it can be demoted to the two-spot......
LeBron Goes For It All Tonight
No. 1 email we've received over the last 48 hours: "Hey, asshead, still think LeBron's playoff debut is unremarkable?" (Answer: OK, maybe he's doing all right.)...
It's Playoff Time! Everybody Grab A Ball!
Before we talk about last night's Clippers' win over the Suns, can we just say how disappointed we were that there wasn't a single incident of a grown man wounding the genitals of another grown man?...
Last Call For The Clips
The Cavaliers', uh, somewhat unexpected rattling-off of three consecutive wins over the Pistons has overshadowed what had been the plucky little engine that could of the postseason: The Clippers, who face elimination at the Staples Center tonight against the Suns....
We Are All Stunned
Well. It's little wonder the The NBA Is Back! platitudes are being brought back out there. This is downright fun....
LeBron's Chance To Take Over
Well, for those of you who are just now waking up from that Clippers-Suns epic last night, there's no time to rest, people. Two more games tonight, with the Mavericks trying to finish off the defending champions and, most compellingly, LeBron James and the Cavaliers continuing their unlikely quest...
Dirk Nowitzki Gets His Hasselhoff On
We suppose, had we put two and two together, we could have seen this coming. In a way, it has a certain spectacular cosmic inevitability....
Wait ... They're Not Still Playing?
Last night's Clippers-Suns game was so intense, so all-inclusive, that we were this close to just live blogging the thing ourselves. (J.E. Skeets did just fine, anyway.) The game ended at 2:18 ET time, which was seven hours ago; a guy who clocked in to work when this game ended still has an hour l...
Chris Kaman And Clippers Ready For World Domination
Little known fact: Clippers center Chris Kaman is not, in fact, actually hurt: That lump on his shoulder is just a normal byproduct of reaching the 25th year of life on his home planet. It's kind of like a birthing pouch, actually; in nine months, a being resembling a cross between Nicko McBrain a...
Somehow ... The Series Is TIED?
As we wait for Mark Cuban to sleep off what is almost certainly an enormous (and well-earned) hangover, we turn our morning attentions to LeBron James and the Cleveland Cavaliers. (No offense to the Mavericks, of course; we are one step closer to the sublime possibility of David Stern handing the ...
Hey, These Playoffs Are Getting Kind Of Fun
If you're one of those cynical souls who doesn't take Rasheed Wallace's word as gospel, we should be in for quite an intriguing evening of basketball. In the first game, we get to find out if this will be a forgettable early chapter in LeBron James' playoff career or if becomes something unique, spe...
Elgin Baylor, NBA Exec Of The Year. This Year, They Mean.
This has to be considered one of the biggest upsets in sports history. If, one year ago, you'd have suggested that it was even possible for Clippers GM Elgin Baylor to one day be considered for the NBA's Executive of the Year award, Jerry West and Joe Dumars would've shown up at your door to take ...
Game Three To The LeBrons
LeBron James racked up a triple double, and it seemed like all of it came within the last four minutes of the game, as the Cavs finally took a game from the Pistons, 86-77. The stretch run of this one resembled an old NBA Live videogame where you can just take one unstoppable player and dominate. ...
Wife-Swapping And Game Fixing
Some clever guys at "The Beast," a satirical newspaper in Buffalo, made some truly legendary prank phone calls to the mayors of both Ottawa and Buffalo as the Sabres and Senators go head-to-head in the NHL playoffs. They ended up propositioning the wife of Buffalo mayor Byron Brown, and then getti...