port Page 956 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Man: The Edmonds Thing Is Really Happening
Augh ... man, the Cubs really did sign Jim Edmonds. Other than Pujols or Willie McGee signing with those guys, we can't imagine our brains hurting more than they do to see this. And we're sure Cubs fans don't feel any better about it. Proceed with extreme caution, Jim; Cards fans can no longer prot...
About Last Night
What you missed while plotting to catch the roadrunner in a perfect storm of ACME mayhem ... • MLB: The Adventures of Robinson Cano ... Yankees strike back, end Rays' win streak. • NBA: Kevin Garnett really does prefer those home uniforms. Celtics 96, Cavaliers 89. • NHL: Stars alive!...
The Era Of Hannah Storm's Sports Center Will Blow (In) Soon
On Saturday, SI.com's Richard Deitsch revealed that ESPN was plopping long-time sports-and-news talking head Hannah Storm into the new morning slot for Sports Center. Tomorrow, ESPN will make the formal announcement at upfront presentations, the big-snazzy press conference done to get the advertiser...
They're Ready to Run For the Roses
The little people are mounting their steeds, which means the most exciting two minutes in sports (setting aside the final two minutes in almost all other highly contested sporting events) can't be far behind. Oh wait, they're playing "My Old(e?) Kentucky Home. This could take a while. Hey, an ex-boy...
Closing Out This Bissinger Business
We really don't want to get into this too much more today, because yesterday was exhausting enough (and we weren't even working!). But we will say this: We were, bizarrely, on "The Best Damn Sports Show Period" yesterday, and not only was the level of discourse pitched higher than on "Costas Now," b...
Moons Over My Prom-Y
For those reading who are teachers, it is that time of the year to volunteer your chaperoning services to one or more of your school's proms. There, your job is to make sure no one's hands fall below the belt line for illegal slow-dance fondling or, you know, make sure no students are having babies ...
Well, So Much For A Cubs World Championship
I found this over at The Big Lead and couldn't stop laughing. Why would Sports Illustrated do this to the Cubs? Chicago is in first place in the NL Central, a game ahead of the Cardinals, just minding their own business and enjoying their place in the sun for once ... and then SI has to pummel them ...
Inglorious Bastardization
The Sports Illustrated cover line writers are big fans of glorious returns, obviously. But what makes these particular returns that much more glorious than others? This is the question posed by Deadspin reader Chris Corley, who asks who will be the next Return To Glory....
Hurry, Before Alex Rodriguez Steals This Job
On Friday, Gawker received an email from the editor of femalemuscle.com, who is on the look out for a full-time blogger to take make "femalemuscle.com into the Gawker of her genre." Well, knowing that there are a few of you out there who are sports blog hobbyists looking to go pro, it only seemed na...
"The Red Sword" Didn't Have The Same Kick
Since we're working under a closer-based economy, a lot of stuff is already in progress, so let's not dilly dally. Okay, a little bit of sloth is in order. After all, it is Sunday, and I'm by no means a slave driver. As everyone knows, the slaves drive me! Ah, plantation humor. Oh, crud, there go my...
NBA Playoffs ... Or Video Game Baseball?
Well, my fellow Americans, we've got... HEY! Stop putting misspelled captions underneath pictures of cats for ONE SECOND and pay attention here. We've got basketball playoffs for you, and if you don't pay attention to the regular season, you at least start becoming aware of pro hoops around this tim...
The Obligatory Cardinals Post You've All Been Dreading
We know we're being idiots even discussing this, but we might not have the opportunity to point it out much longer: Our Cardinals are in first place and playing their asses off....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while patiently waiting for Tiger to turn it up a notch... • MLB: New York Yankees at Boston Red Sox. Sigh [ESPN] • Hockey: New Jersey Devils at New York Rangers and San Jose Sharks at Calgary Flames. [Versus] • Animation: The Simpsons. Thank god. [FOX]...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wondering why Tim Tebow's dad doesn't marry Jesus... • Boxing: Miguel Cotto vs. Alfonso Gomez and Antonio Margarito vs. Kermit Cintron. This card is awesome. • Boxing: Antonio Tarver vs. Clinton Woods and Chad Dawson vs. Glen Johnson. Large has a great rundown of the big fight ni...
Springtime For Meyer
• In Progress — CFB: Florida Gators Spring Game. Tebow is sick and Harvin has heel problems that tend to plague men of similar greatness. [ESPN] • In Progress — Tennis: WTA Bausch & Lomb Championships, Semifinal. It's Maria Sharapova and Lindsay Davenport if I'm not mistaken. [ESPN2] • 2:00 — Hockey...
Gay Writer To Royals: Your Calendar Does Not Give Us Chubs
When the Kansas City Royals unveiled a not-so-provocative calendar featuring candid photos of their 2008 squad, it provided ample opportunity for sports bloggers to point and laugh with the usual amount of unbridled enthusiasm. The calendar, whose proceeds go toward a female self-defense program in ...
TV Listings (With Proper Timestampery)
Quite exciting, this web log magic. For once the TV listings will show up on the correct date, unless of course I'm merely being preemptively presumptuous and the TV listings for today appear sometime next Thursday on Jalopnik. So let's see where the time-o-meter takes us, so in the meantime, please...
Buzzsaw Girl Is Not Who You Think
The telly selection this afternoon is mediocre. And I can say that with a streak of honesty because the TV companies aren't paying me. Now the Internet, on the other hand ... has TONS of great stuff you can read. And a lot of it can be found on this website! Don't question it. Your retro video game ...