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Report: Many Dallas Athletes Run Shoddy Charities
As Jerry Jones prepares to host two teams playing for a Super Bowl title, the Dallas Morning News does God's work in declaring that local stars aren't as philanthropic as they'd have you believe....

Controversial World Cup Referee Is Now An Admitted Heroin Smuggler
Byron Moreno refereed the 2002 World Cup match in which America upset Portugal, and cost Italy a chance to advance to the knock-out round with a questionable call against South Korea. He also just copped to smuggling heroin....

The Other Canseco Got Arrested On DUI Charges This Morning
If this report from the Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office is to be believed, Osvaldo Canseco got arrested at 2:13 this morning and blew a .109....

Wes Welker Makes 11 References To Feet In One Press Conference
In a mere nine minutes of Q&A, we noted Welker making an oddly high number of foot references. Here they all are for your sexual listening pleasure. The Patriots' trash-talking is a little more subtle than the Jets'....

Today In Dumb Anti-NFLPA Spin
Florio has a pretty good rundown of the NFL's coming labor apocalypse, but there's one point he makes that I really hope doesn't catch on, even though you can be sure it will....

Swedish Orgy Blackmail For Premier League Star? Sure, Why Not
Someone's trying to blackmail a Premier League player with video and photos of his Las Vegas tryst with three Swedish blondes. And he wants this covered up...why? [Daily Mail]...

Is There Anything Ken Griffey's Rookie Card Can't Do?
The discovery of a rare Griffey card helped Albany police bust some burglars. The man's a national treasure. [WNYT]...

Dead Wrestler Of The Week: "Ravishing" Rick Rude
An occasional feature in which we honor the sport's fallen and examine their legacies. Today: "Ravishing" Rick Rude, who died in 1999 of heart failure possibly caused by a drug overdose....

OK, Let's Talk About That Double Dutch Sports Bra Ad
You know the one. Even if you didn't notice what's being advertised, you noticed the commercial....

Soccer Could See Its First Photoshop-Related Fine
Soccer players: they're just like us! Liverpool's Ryan Babel could face discipline for Tweeting this photoshopped picture of the ref wearing a Manchester United jersey after a controversial FA Cup match yesterday. He should be suspended, if only for using "SMH." [Guardian]...

NHL's Weird Superhero Tie-In Reaches Nadir Not To Be Equaled Until Tomorrow, Probably
Been following along with the unveiling of the NHL's "Guardians?" Oh ho, are you missing out....

Terrelle Pryor Will Gank Your Sign
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Buddy Ryan Also Had Pretty Feet, Too
Like his son Rex, former NFL head coach and "46" defense guru Buddy Ryan was also subjected to a somewhat humiliating barefoot ordeal several years ago. Turns out a sports radio host once publicly washed the coach's gnarly feet. [Philly.com]...

SB Nation's Top Sports GIFs Of 2010 Is Quite Outstanding
Prepare to spend the rest of the afternoon not earning your undeserved paycheck more than usual. SB Nation's Jon Bois put in enough overtime for everyone this year. [SB Nation]...

If You Mess With The Skunk, You Get Face Punched
So, former pro wrestler Christopher "The Skunk" Antal, who lost a mayoral bid in Massachusetts and pretended to urinate on a Brazilian flag on his cable-access show, was just charged with punching a 59-year-old woman in the face....

Ohio State Players Who Took Discounted Stuff Will Return For Another Year Of Nominally Unpaid Labor
The Tattooed Five will be back in Columbus next year, per an agreement with Jim Tressel, who will teach the players a hard lesson about not paying for stuff by bringing them back for another year of unpaid football....

26 Seconds Of Tim Tebow Charming The Pants Off Everyone
On Sunday, Tim Tebow threw for 308 yards and had two touchdowns in a 24-23 come-from-behind win over the Texans. He promptly tweeted a Bible passage and then charmed the pants off everyone in the postgame press conference....

The OSU Punishments Are An Embarrassment To The NCAA, And Show Exactly Who Cares About Bowl Games
Terrelle Pryor and four other Buckeyes will miss five games next year, but will play in this year's Sugar Bowl. An odd punishment, one that illustrates the corporate interests at play and the apparent validity of the "I didn't know" defense....

The Spoiler’s Premier League Team Of The Season (So Far)
As is tradition, The Spoiler shall start with the bad news — only ONE player from our "Predicted Team of the Season" compiled in early August looks set to make the XI once the league is done and dusted....

The Uncomfortable Rex Ryan Press Conference, In Eight Seconds
As you know, Rex Ryan addressed the media earlier today. They asked him some stuff. This is more or less how it went. [Sports Grid]...