premier-league Page 58 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Mario Balotelli: Spokesman For Firework Safety
Man City's mercurial striker had one hell of a weekend. He set his rented $4.8 million house on fire after setting off fireworks in the bathroom. He scored the first two goals in a 6-1 thrashing of second place Manchester United at Old Trafford, Sir Alex's "worst ever" defeat. He drove through Manch...

"City Fans, 10% Off; United Fans, Fuck Off."
Could you tell it's nearly derby day? With City two points clear ahead of Sunday's showdown at Old Trafford, the watering holes of Manchester are taking sides. [Twitter]...

Are Things Going Any Better For John Henry Over At Liverpool?
It's been almost exactly one year since Henry's Fenway Sports Group purchased Liverpool, so to mark the occasion, Henry agreed to a rare lengthy interview with the Guardian. Both parts are well worth your time, but let's draw out the interesting stuff....

Samir Nasri Will Not Score Until April
City closed the deal with their 40 million dollar man today, and to celebrate, they had EA Sports put together an image of Nasri scoring his first goal, using the upcoming FIFA 12. Nasri appears to have slipped past Vidic and a very out-of-position Rooney, and City fans probably cannot wait for this...

Samuel Eto'o Will Leave Inter Milan For Obscure Russian Club (And Billions Of Rubles)
Samuel Eto'o, the 30-year-old Cameroonian soccer player, is leaving the glitz and prestige of Serie A's Inter Milan to play "for an obscure club in the violence-wracked Caucasus region of Dagestan, Russia." From Milan, one of the world's fashion capitals, to Dagestan: the land of the mountains. This...

Today In Great Coach Quotes
"If you want a Savile Row suit, you pay Savile Row prices, but you can still put a suit on your back from Tesco's... It would be unfair to expect the Tesco man to look as good as the Savile Row man." [West Brom manager Roy Hodgson on the team's bankroll, via Yahoo! Sport]...

Here's Video Of A Ukrainian Goalkeeper Making What Has To Be The Worst Play Of His Career
In Ukrainian Premier League action yesterday, a Volyn Lutsk defender scored from roughly 45 yards out during a match against Kryvbas Krivyi Rih. He did so by passing the ball to his own goalkeeper, Vitaliy Nedilko, who had a difficult time of stopping it before it cost his side a 1-0 loss....

Here's Video Of A Scottish Soccer Fan Attacking A Scottish Soccer Manager Earlier Today
With a 3-0 win over Heart of Midlothian (aka Hearts) at Tynecastle Stadium in Edinburgh, Scotland, Celtic moved to within one point of Rangers for the Scottish Premier League title. But, here's the real story:...

An Update On Telling You Which Soccer Player Had An Affair With This Lady
We felt very bad last time. We hate blind items (though we did guess Ryan Giggs). But there's this thing in the UK where celebrities can get court-ordered injunctions against newspapers publishing items about their personal lives. They're called injunctions, and lots of celebrities have them, and to...

Tinfoil Hatters Have Something To Talk About For Man U-Chelsea
That's referee Howard Webb over there. A photoshop of him actually, because he doesn't really wear a Manchester United kit while refereeing. He wears a referee's shirt. After a controversial FA Cup match in January, with some controversial decisions going United's way, Liverpool player Ryan Babel po...

Clint Dempsey Bangs One In With A Flying Side Volley
You know what's hard to do? This. Clint Dempsey has never embraced the workmanlike Yankee style that many American players appear to have stuck in their chromosomes. The man takes risks. He's good at it. It's why he's good....

Why We Can't Tell You Which Soccer Player Had An Affair With This Lady
Because we don't know. (We're pretty sure it's Giggs, but that's not the point.) And we may never know, as a British judge granted an injunction against a newspaper to prevent it from revealing the details of the player's affair with Imogen Thomas....

Wayne Rooney Scored A Hat Trick, Swore In Celebration, Got A Two-Match Ban
Premier League justice is worse than Sheriff Goodell's....

Qataris Develop Artificial Cloud To Keep Pitch Cool During World Cup
Qatar 2022 will undoubtedly see at least 15 times more pissing and moaning than we had to endure during the South African World Cup last year, but if even half the technology proposed for the games comes to light, it'll remain a fantastic spectacle....

So, Who’s Gonna Get Relegated From The Premier League?
The top of the Premier League ain't that exciting. Arsenal will fall away, Chelsea will come back into it and push Man Utd for a bit before dropping out to leave Fergie and his phone to win it with two games to spare....

It's About Time Michael Jackson Got A Statue At A Premier League Stadium
Fulham seems safe from relegation for now, but that doesn't mean they can't be a laughingstock. The club has announced it will unveil a statue of Michael Jackson at Craven Cottage, all because he was good friends with their Chairman....

FIFA Gets It Wrong On Getting It Right
Goal-line technology could be getting its first major test in the Premier League next season, and be on its way to FIFA-wide use. It's long overdue, and yet they're even screwing this step up....

At Least Liverpool Still Has One Fernando Torres
With Torres headed to Chelsea for a record $80 million, you know who's got to be steamed? The Liverpool fan who legally changed his name to "Fernando Torres" last month....

Swedish Orgy Blackmail For Premier League Star? Sure, Why Not
Someone's trying to blackmail a Premier League player with video and photos of his Las Vegas tryst with three Swedish blondes. And he wants this covered up...why? [Daily Mail]...

Soccer Could See Its First Photoshop-Related Fine
Soccer players: they're just like us! Liverpool's Ryan Babel could face discipline for Tweeting this photoshopped picture of the ref wearing a Manchester United jersey after a controversial FA Cup match yesterday. He should be suspended, if only for using "SMH." [Guardian]...