pti Page 17 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ticket Offices Use "TV Prank" Story To Con World Cup Fans
A ticket office in South Africa is under investigation by FIFA for apparently trying to rip off World Cup fans by claiming they're part of a hidden camera TV show....
Introducing The Sports Phella, Phil Simmons
Bill Simmons was nice enough to Tweet-lert everyone of ABCNews.com's captioning gaffe but we all know it was just to prove he gets invited to parties/smokes up with Ricky Williams. Click 'n' embiggen. [@sportsguy33]...
Nutty Protesters Going After Hockey Now, Apparently
Westboro Baptist Church, best known for disrupting soldiers' funerals and being generally batshit insane, are currently — at this very moment! — picketing outside the Stars/Coyotes game in Dallas. Because nothing saith "abomination unto the Lord" like Marty Turco's goaltending....
OK, One Last Piece Of Brett Favre Schadenfreude
From the same Vikings radio team that brought you "This is not Detroit, man" comes this swaggering bit of audio, spoken just moments earlier: "Game's tied at 28. Fine. Because Brett Favre is the quarterback of the Minnesota Vikings."...
A More Visceral, Profane Reaction To Favre's Interception
One Favre-jersey wearer, shows us what it's like to go into apoplectic shock, while his poor daughter just yelps. I get the sense he kicked something hard once the game mercifully ended. [TheScore]...
A Video Treasury Of Brett Favre's Season-Ending Interceptions (UPDATE)
Brett Favre has now thrown an interception in his last significant pass of the last game of the last three seasons. Let's look back at the ol' gunslinger fearlessly doing the thing that makes Tom Jackson admire him so....
Vikings Radio Announcers Do Little To Hide Their Anger, Frustration and Disappointment After Favre INT
"This is not Detroit, man — THIS IS THE SUPER BOWL!" Poor guys. [SI.com/Via ExtraMustard...
Pardon The Coitus Interruptus
Maybe you've experienced the act of lovemaking. If so, please tell us what it's like; we're bloggers. But have you experienced lovemaking as narrated by Kornheiser and Wilbon?...
Mark Whicker Has Left The Yard Before
The year was 1991. Journalist and ex-Marine Terry Anderson had just been freed after nearly seven years of captivity in Lebanon. Seven years is a long time. Luckily, a columnist named Mark Whicker was around to put it in perspective....
Team Field Trip Gets More Baptismal Than Expected
You're a high school football player, on a team-building excursion. Your coach promised you steak, so you and your teammates are really looking forward to it. When suddenly — bam!! — surprise baptism....
Please Make This Cougar Phenomenon Go Away
Seriously. Just stop. Fellas, if you need a release that bad, act like everyone else and patronize your local washy-wash. You'll feel slightly less humiliated. [7x7]...
Hooray! America Is Still Dominant In Something!
The U.S. has won another LLWS. Let us reflect on the wise words of former attorney general Herbert Brownell: "The young Americans who compose the Little League will prove a hitless target for the peddlers of godless ideology." [AP]...
Why Your Team Sucks: Carolina Panthers
Some people are fans of the Carolina Panthers. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Carolina Panthers. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
Alexander Ovechkin Is Here To Do Two Things: Play Hockey And Sex Your Women
And hockey season is over. Russia Today gets to the bottom Alex Ovechkin's life, complete with helpful on-screen guides. Revelations: He's ugly, sadness makes him cry, and sex is good. You're welcome. [Puck Duddy]...
The Real Reason Michael Phelps Won't Meet With the Pope
It's not because he got high (as we all know, the Pope smokes dope). The reason famous fish-person Michael Phelps won't meet with the Nazi Pope is buried deep in his family history, as revealed on his Wikipedia page....
Starred Commenter Theater: Cannonball
Canada's Eric Sehn dives in the men's 10m platform preliminaries at the World Championships last week. [Reuters via The Big Picture]...
Starred Commenter Theater: The Watermelonheads
Fans, wearing watermelons on their heads, watch the Rays-Blue Jays game in Toronto on Saturday. [Canadian Press/Associated Press via WSJ]...
Starred Commenter Theater: Water Polo Roughhousing
Show your open caption abilities, please. [A Hungarian water polo player, right, and his Serbian opponent in the quarterfinals of the world championships in Rome; image via European Pressphoto Agency via NYT]...
Recruiting Information Wants To Be Free
It's hard to determine which end of the recruiting process is more corrupt. In one corner are the coaches who feed egos to drive theirs; in the other are the AAU type who extort high schoolers' phone numbers for cash....
Open Caption: Yep, That's An Oscar Mayer Wiener
"An Oscar Meyer Wienermobile crashed into the home and outdoor deck. The vehicle was parked in the driveway. The driver lurched the vehicle forward instead of backing out of the driveway, hitting the deck and cracking the house's foundation." [Strib]...