rad Page 278 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
OK, Last Photoshop, We Promise!
Except for the ones below, that is. There's just so many amusing ones out there, that it's hard to stop. And now, for the final word on Super Bowl XLII, we'll hand the mic over to Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force, who as you might imagine is quite enthused with the result. In fact, it may be his fin...
Trying To Figure Out That Crazy Shaq-Suns Trade
It's pretty rare, in this sports world we all love, fear and hold dear, to find something that everyone agrees on. Unanimity of opinion is non-existent; we sometimes wonder if you held a poll saying, "Would you like to be punched in the face right now?" the margin would still have at least 0.001 pe...
Whining About Patriots' Loss Now A Greater Threat Than Global Warming
So this is somewhat amusing. According to Amani Toomer, before the game on Sunday Patriots' players were inviting him to their victory parties. "They were inviting us to their parties after the game," Toomer said. "They showed us no respect." Meanwhile, Tom Brady has dropped out of the Pro Bowl (exp...
The Patriots Are, At Last, Losers. Like The Rest Of Us.
It is rare in the world of sports to find a moment when two revelatory, unifying moments converge into something that stuns us all, from every direction. Around 10:20 p.m. ET last night, the sports planet's tectonic plates shifted so dramatically that we thought our heads would never stop spinning...
Who's Sorry Now? Fat Guy Edition
In possibly the biggest apology in soccer history (until the LA Galaxy gets around to explaining the whole Beckham thing), Diego Maradona has apparently admitted that it was his hand — not God's — that pushed home Argentina's game-turning goal against England in the 1986 World Cup. Of course, the fa...
Tom Brady Will Be Well Coiffed On Sunday
The big Super Bowl question concerning Tom Brady isn't "Is he injured?", but rather "Will he have his nails done?" One can bet that the answer is affirmative, as word has leaked that the Patriots' quarterback will have his own hair stylist on hand in Glendale this weekend. They're calling him a barb...
Whoa! I Can't Even Tell Them Apart!
Tyler Pratt — um, pictured left — sent a photo of himself in to some Patriots look-alike contest saying people tell him he looks like Tom Brady. Apparently, Tyler Pratt works in a cave ... with blind people ... who are horrible fuckin' liars....
Ideas For A More Enjoyable Super Bowl Week
Rarely do commenters on other sites even come close to the wit and wisdom of our own Deadspin Army of Darkness (sorry if that sounds like sucking up, but independent studies have proven this to be true). Occasionally, though, one catches my eye with a tape measure home run. Such was the case yesterd...
Dramatic New Footage Surfaces Of Tom Brady Walking
Tom Brady WILL be at the dance tonight, girls. He WILL be there. I'm paraphrasing Bill Murray in Meatballs, but you get the picture. So, Brady's "high ankle sprain" is not as serious as many believed (hoped?) ... unless they're now making walking casts in pointy-toed dress shoe designs. He showed up...
Another Reason To Yammer About Tom Brady All Week
SCANDALOUS celebrity Web site TMZ was the first to post the pictures of Tom Brady's "boot cast thing" — trademark Deadspin! — and it is everyone in a tizzy. We quite love the idea of John Clayton and Len Pasquarelli digging through TMZ for more Tom Brady injury updates....
Giants Running Back Once Couldn't Even Outrun The Five-Oh
One of the nice aspects of the Super Bowl is that, with the media clusterphooey descending on the game, smaller stories that people might not know about lesser-known players. OK, actually, this is one of those theoretically nice things; it never actually happens this way, which is why, we repeat, yo...
Somewhere There's A Tom Brady Voodoo Doll With A Pin In Its Foot
Your chances of seeing Matt Gutierrez at quarterback in the Super Bowl just improved slightly on Monday, as Tom Brady was spotted hobbling down a New York sidewalk in a foot cast. Now what this means is not clear; all that we know for certain is that Brady's foot speed is pretty much unchanged. My g...
All Mascots Need Teardrop Tattoos
We have long felt that our nationwide mascot menace has proven, ultimately, not quite menacing enough for our tastes. Fortunately, some students at Colorado are fixing that....
Brady Quinn's Unfortunate Circumstances
With the news yesterday that the Browns are looking to sign Derek "Horse Balls" Anderson to long-term contract, we look ominously to a future that, sadly ... could be Brady Quinn-less....
Brett Favre And The Men Who Love Him
I just love it when a journalist develops a man crush on an athlete and loses all perspective. It seems to happen a lot with Brett Favre for some reason; perhaps its his indominable spirit ... or his eyes, which are like limpid pools ... . Anyway, count Frank Cooney, founder and publisher of The Spo...
Supermodels Not Included
We have always been wary of getting a tattoo of anything involving sports fandom, mainly because: a) you never know when your team will betray or your favorite player will end up murdering his houseboy; and b) tattoos really hurt, and we cry easily. But one Patriots fan has no such qualms....
Tom Brady Wants You To Buy Some Water
Glaceau smartwater; magic elixir of the Gods. Too bad it wasn't around in 2000, when Brady posed for this photo for the NFL combine. How times have changed. Now our hero is toting the water in a new series of print ads (the real ads can be found here), for which he was paid a reported $3 million. I...