rb Page 442 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
He Can't Even Play For Isiah
It's been a week or two since we checked in with the running joke that is the New York Knicks. As it turns out, it doesn't look like the dream pairing of Stephon Marbury and his "father figure" Isiah Thomas is going to function as seamlessly as we all thought it would. Things reached a low-point l...
Enjoy Thanksgiving Night Football (Maybe, Probably Not)
The slate of NFL games for Thanksgiving Day, as is often the case, aren't the most exciting, if just because we have to deal with Detroit every year. The Dallas game features the glory of Bruce Gradkowski, so that's not all too inspiring either....
Your Barbaro Holiday Gift Giving Guide
As the holidays draw ever closer, it's time for us to address the serious issues; such as what should we get Barbaro for Christmas? You really should start shopping now to beat the rush. Perhaps Barbaro would like to learn a foreign language, so that he can enjoy all of his fan letters from Mexico...
Hey, Nice Brain Tumor, Idiot
As the Mighty MJD mentioned on Saturday, the pro-Ohio State group The Dead Schembechlers have disbanded due to the death of the actual Bo Schembechler. But we here in the U.S. do not have a monopoly on class. Over in England, Newcastle soccer coach Glenn Roeder had emergency life-saving surgery to...
Heavy Is The Head That Wears The Fitted National League Cap
This story isn't totally new, but it's the first we've seen of it. And we have to warn you in advance that all sides here are quite possibly insane. Charles Littleton, 22, was tackled, tasered and hauled off to the hoosegow last week for refusing to remove his Los Angeles Dodgers cap during a Sagina...
Sunday Night Football: Chargers @ Broncos
You've got LaDainian Tomlinson trying to be the fastest to get to 100 TDs, you've got a struggling Jake Plummer trying to hold onto his starting job, you've got an important game between two AFC teams with legit Super Bowl hopes... but I don't think game previews get any more insightful or poignant ...
Barbaro Forever
Good news for Barbaro fans. If the worst should happen, there's still hope that "Bobby" will not be gone for good. In Austin Texas, scientists successfully cloned a barrel-racing horse named Scamper....
It's Barbaro's World, We Just Live In It
Well, it's finally happened: Barbaro is now getting letters from other horses. We know this is true because the University of Pennsylvania School of Veterinary Medicine is screening all e-mail to the Barbaro message board these days, and this one got through:...
Your Tuesday Barbaro Update
It's almost that time of the year again, when Santa hitches Barbaro to his sleigh and delivers gifts to all the good boys and girls throughout the world (except France). What happened to Santa's reindeer? All we'll say: Don't look in the freezer....
Is Your Relationship With Barbaro All That It Can Be?
Even though he has faced many obstacles recently — including a stinging defeat in our Hall of Fame balloting of a couple of months ago — Barbaro has somehow always found the will to survive. And now the racehorse is on the verge of the most dramatic triumph of all, as doctors announced on Wednesda...
Breaking: Athletes Also Like to Jack Off to Internet
ESPN reports on a dangerous new problem facing that country's footballers:...
Will a Picture of a Drunk QB Shut You Up For a Little While?
I know, I know, you miss Will. Believe me, so do I. In the interests of moving us a little closer to the goal line, here's a drunken athlete photo: It's Giants QB Eli Manning, although whether or not his expression here is one of inebriation or, you know, the default genetic Manning visage is a ques...
Red Auerbach Passes Away
I'm too young and to fully appreciate the aura of Red Auerbach, but I do know that anyone willing to fire up a cigar on the bench before the game was over is a bad-ass. Red also coached the Boston Celtics to nine NBA championships, eight of them in a row... which also doesn't hurt his image as a b...
Cultural Oddsmaker: What Will Tiki Do Next?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....
Kirk Herbstreit Hates Your Funky Dance Moves
I promised you more Kirk Herbstreit vitriol, and here it is. During Thursday night's Virginia Tech/Boston College game, Herbie delights in verbally lighting up Virginia Tech linebacker Brenden Hill....
So This Horse Walks Into A Bar ...
"So yeah, then all these people start sending me letters. Crazy shit, too, like Bible verses, and poems. Like I can read poems ... I'm a horse, ferchristsakes. And now the vets are back putting me into this sling, and I'm twirling around above a tub of water like a goddamned circus sideshow. If th...
Johnny Damon, Grabbing Himself And Having Sex
Johnny Damon beats off in centerfield. At least, I think that's what she's saying. And you know, she doesn't seem repulsed by the idea... not enough to follow Damon home and mess with his war veteran father, anyway....
Find Strength Through "Pre-Milk!"
Because we feel like part of our job is to inform you, the blog reader, about all the different ways to artificially maximize your body's potential, we introduce you to the newest big thing in performance enhancement: cow afterbirth!...
An Update On America's Dorkiest Sports Feud
So remember, the Sklar Brothers-Bill Simmons feud? Simmons apparently has disliked the "Cheap Seats" hosts' comedy sensibilities for years, and, probably because it's not exactly ESPN's most popular program, Simmons has been allowed to openly mock it in his columns. The Sklar brothers have always se...
This Baby Is Not A Public Relations Stooge
Continuing in the grand tradition of cute tiny babies being terrified by professional athletes photos — a genre that hit its pinnacle with this legendary shot — we present this photo of Stephon Marbury, about to be backhanded by a child who doesn't want those cheap-ass ugly shoes....