How On God's Green Earth Did This Ball Not Go In?
AZ Alkmaar plastered PEC Zwolle in the Dutch Cup today by a score of 5-0. However, due to some wicked backspin and an…
The Real Star Of Mike Piazza's Doomed Foray Into Italian Soccer Is His Wife
Over at The Athletic, author Robert Andrew Powell wrote an entertaining and comprehensive story about Mike Piazza’s…
José Mourinho's Failed Tenure At Manchester United Is Finally Over
After two-and-a-half bad and boring seasons at Manchester United, the club announced today in some euphemistic language…
The New MLS Playoff Format Is A Disaster In Waiting
In its effort to continue to tweak every single thing imaginable, MLS announced on Monday that there will be a new…
This Is How Liverpool Will Win The Premier League
Liverpool are legitimate contenders to win all the big trophies this season for the simple reason that their starting…
Paulo Dybala Learns What It's Like To Play With Cristiano Ronaldo
Here is what would’ve been Paulo Dybala’s equalizing wondergoal in the last seconds of Juventus’s 2-1 loss to Young…
Thomas Müller Sent Off For Karate-Kicking Opponent Upside The Head Like A True Maniac
Bayern Munich will advance into the Champions League knockout rounds atop their group after a wild draw with Ajax today…
It Must Suck So Hard To Be A Manchester United Fan
Try, if only for a moment, to go inside the mind of a Manchester United fan.
World-Famous Atlanta Strip Club Welcomes In A Little-Known Soccer Trophy For Some Booty Dancing
Millions of young boys around the world dream of one day making it inside Magic City, Atlanta’s internationally…
Ousmane Dembélé Clowns Two Tottenham Defenders And Dunks The Ball Into The Net
Ousmane Dembélé just gave Barcelona the lead against Tottenham in the Champions League by flying past defender Kyle…
Of Course Lionel Messi Has Become A Master Of Free Kicks
Lionel Messi is slowing down. It’s a painful thing to admit, but it’s true. As the old saw goes, Father Time is…
Chelsea Ban Four Fans In Conjunction With Alleged Racist Abuse Of Raheem Sterling
While local police investigate an incident during Saturday’s Chelsea-Manchester City match during which a Chelsea fan…
Cristiano Ronaldo Is Glad He No Longer Plays With Selfish Assholes Like Cristiano Ronaldo
Cristiano Ronaldo obviously loves himself some Cristiano Ronaldo. But you know who Cristiano Ronaldo doesn’t love?…
Thank God David Silva's Hair Transplant Is Finally Taking Root
David Silva has long been one of the most aesthetically pleasing players in soccer, mostly because he is a wizard with…
Josh Sargent Makes Strong Case For Wonderteenhood By Scoring On His Bundesliga Debut
Redheaded American forward Josh Sargent—probably the first- or second-most likely American teenager to inherit the…
Ronaldo's Sisters Should Probably Chill Out
After Real Madrid’s Luka Modric won the Ballon d’Or yesterday, becoming the first person not named Lionel Messi or…
Heroic Doggy Keeper Rescues Blundering Human Keeper With Great, Adorable Save
Juventud Unida beat Defensores de Belgrano 3-0 on Sunday in Argentina’s third division. The home team would’ve won by…
David Moyes Is The Most Interested Man In The World
Southampton fired Mark Hughes today after finally realizing what was evident to just about everyone the day he got the…
Tottenham Fan Arrested For Throwing Banana At Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang
London police arrested seven people following Sunday’s wild North London Derby, which Arsenal won with a 4-2 beatdown…
Tortured Hiring Process For USMNT Coaching Job Finally Ends The Way Everyone Knew It Would
U.S. Soccer finally made it official: Gregg Berhalter, who has spent the past five years coaching the Columbus Crew,…