screamer Page 151 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Is The Soccer Flop To End All Soccer Flops
Leeds United took on Derby County over the weekend, and that's not at all interesting except for the fact that the game gave us a truly glorious flop....
FIFA Announces Who Will Stand Next To Ronaldo When He Wins Ballon D'or
As inevitable as Cristiano Ronaldo's impending Ballon d'Or victory has been, this year's award campaign has been especially tedious. So we're happy that FIFA's announcement of the three finalists brings us one step closer to being done with the whole thing....
Violence Erupts At Jalisco Stadium After Monterrey Knocks Off Atlas
Atlas and Monterrey supporters clashed with each other and police following tonight's 2-0 Monterrey win that moved Los Rayados into the Liga MX playoff semifinals. Univision Deportes reported multiple police suffered injuries, while others formed a protective shield around Monterrey supporters to pr...
Kevin Mirallas's Beautiful Curling Goal Was Right Out Of A Video Game
After a well-cleared cross from a free kick near the box, Everton's Kevin Mirallas collected the ball and crushed this shot, bending it perfectly into the far corner of Tottenham's goal. You can almost feel how hard he was squeezing the finesse shot button....
Massive Soccer Hooligan Brawl Leaves One Man Beaten, Thrown Into River
Earlier this morning, Atlético Madrid and Deportivo la Coruña were set to do battle in Madrid. But before the match kicked off, some 200 or so rival fans decided to stage an actual fight, which resulted in knife wounds, head injuries, and one man suffering a heart attack before getting thrown into a...
Argentine Soccer Broadcaster Is A Rollercoaster Of Emotions
Make sure you have turned YouTube's closed captioning on, and then watch this glorious video of an Argentine second division match from February. When Talleres de Córdoba scores in the 89th minute, the homer broadcaster sings a lyrical description straight out of Galeano (well, not quite). When Almi...
This Cristiano Ronaldo Ballon D'Or Campaign Is Getting Really Gross
UEFA president Michel Platini made a pretty reasonable comment in Madrid earlier this week, saying in his opinion the Ballon d'Or should go to a German player after the country's success in the World Cup. The statement set off the Real Madrid spin machine though, and the team took matters into their...
Manchester City's Messiah Sergio Agüero Pulls Another Resurrection Act
Twenty minutes into Manchester City's crucial home Champions League match against Bayern Munich on Tuesday, it looked like everything had broken right for the English champions. Earlier in the day, in the other matchup in City's group, Roma somehow contrived to draw a game they really should've won,...
David Moyes Doesn't Know Who His New Players Are
I'd cut David Moyes—who's just moved to a foreign country with a foreign language for a new job in a new league—some slack here, as "Stefano" isn't too far off from "Esteban," but then I think, What if Steve Kerr showed up to practice calling his point guard "Steven" Curry?...
Sony Ends FIFA Sponsorship, No Longer Supports Slavery
Following the footsteps of Emirates airlines, Sony has officially decided to end its sponsorship with FIFA. Some—but not all—of the brands are realizing, it seems, that supporting a group that supports any number of corrupt and nefarious practices isn't a good look....
Diego Maradona Shows Off Another Use For The Hand Of God
Technically, he's still using his hand to score, just in a bit of a different way....
Watch Messi Break The All-Time La Liga Scoring Record
Lionel Messi became the top scorer in La Liga history with this 72nd minute goal against Sevilla, his second of the game. It was Messi's 252nd league goal, which topped Athletic Bilbao legend Telmo Zarra's 251, who did most of his damage in the 1940s. A few minutes later Messi got his hat trick, s...
Man City Goal The Product Of Perfect Execution
Yaya Touré put Man City up 2-1 thanks to this gorgeous play in which everything worked to perfection....
Here's Wayne Rooney's Cute Little Son Doing A Cute Little Cartwheel
After his second goal in the England-Scotland match earlier this week, Wayne Rooney celebrated by doing a cartwheel. Today, he revealed the inspiration behind the move by posting an Instagram video of his son Kai's favorite new move:...
Zinedine Zidane No Longer Has To Pretend Not To Coach Team He Coaches
A couple months ago, we told you about how Zinedine Zidane, manager of Real Madrid Castilla, was under investigation for not having the proper coaching qualifications. The Frenchman had two ways to fight the impending punishment: either cadge up the qualifications or deny that he was actually the ma...
Xabi Alonso Forced To Apologize To Ronaldo For Stupid, Fake Controversy
Remember that dumb story Real Madrid pitched to their stooges at Marca yesterday, where some milquetoast statements of Xabi Alonso's were folded, kneaded, and ultimately transformed into direct insults to former teammates Cristiano Ronaldo and Iker Casillas? Well, it worked....
Shitty Swiss Team Cuts 11 Players After Youth Team Blows Them Out 10-0
FC Grenchen, of Switzerland's fourth division, suck at soccer. In their last nine matches, they've collected all of zero points while shipping 66—yes, 66—goals, 10 of which came at the feet of FC Luzern's youth squad. Following that horrific result, Grenchen's sporting director decided to cut 11 pla...
Meet <em>Marca</em>, The Hilarious Propaganda Arm Of Real Madrid
It's maybe a little difficult for Americans to grasp just how deeply and blatantly in the tank the European press can be for the local XI. And no one is deeper and more blatantly in the tank for the local XI than the media in Spain, where the local XI means either Barcelona and Real Madrid and where...
Wigan Owner Doubles Down On New Manager's Racism And Antisemitism
Wigan Athletic courted controversy this week by hiring Malky Mackay, who is under investigation by the FA for assorted bigoted and offensive text messages that were sent more than a year ago but came to light over the summer. Wigan owner Dave Whelan spoke with the Guardian today, and offered a defen...
DC Comics Claims Valencia's New Crest Looks Too Much Like Batman Logo
Holy intellectual property law, Batman, why are you beefing with this Spanish soccer team?...