screamer Page 17 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Real Madrid And Gareth Bale Can't Stand Each Other, But Can Still Find A Happy Ending<em></em><em></em><em></em>
That Gareth Bale scored the decisive goal in Real Madrid’s 2-1 victory over Levante Sunday mattered less than the fact that the perpetually gimpy and presently out-of-favor Welsh star played at all, and it’s less important even than his reaction to his match-winning penalty. Bale scored, as he often...
Goalkeeper's Boner Overshadowed By Striker's Even Bigger Boner
Libertad goalkeeper Martín Silva must’ve thought he was the biggest idiot on the pitch when his error served up an incredibly easy scoring opportunity for Atlético Nacional forward Omar Duarte in a Copa Libertadores match Thursday night. Luckily for Silva, Duarte one-upped the keeper with an even wo...
FIFA Bans Chelsea From Signing New Players Until Summer 2020
FIFA has hit Chelsea with a registration ban for the next two transfer windows, preventing them from signing new players until the summer of 2020, because of violations related to the signing of players under the age of 18....
Diego Simeone Explains Ball-Grabbing Celebration: "It Means We Have Balls, A Lot Of Balls"
Atletico Madrid put together an impressive 2-0 victory over Juventus in the Champions League yesterday, and manager Diego Simeone was caught, uh, expressing himself after José María Giménez put his team up 1-0 in the 78th minute. As you can see in the GIF above, Simeone appeared to turn towards the ...
Chelsea Are Getting A Ride On The Paul Pogba Experience
Manchester United haven’t had much of the ball through the first half of today’s FA Cup match against Chelsea, and when they have gotten possession they haven’t managed to produce very many crisp passages of play. They lead 2-0 at half time, though, because they have Paul Pogba....
This Little Kid's Spinning Backheel Volley Goal Is Cooler Than Anything You've Ever Done In Your Life
I don’t think goals in Polish U11 futsal tournaments qualify for the Puskás Award, but if they did then this unreal dink from little Bartosz Kuśmierczyk would make for a hell of a contender:...
Mamadou Sakho Is Crystal Palace's Dap Master
This video, in which Crystal Palace defender Mamadou Sakho walks around the team cafeteria casually rattling off a series of intricate and unique handshakes with eight different teammates, could only be improved if at the end manager Roy Hodgson walked up and the two pulled off the most complex one ...
Players Like Sergio Ramos Are Why You Can Never Count Out Real Madrid
Real Madrid were always going to struggle to cope with losing Cristiano Ronaldo last summer, and during the first half of a miserable season with only one notable bright spot, that challenge proved even tougher than most would’ve imagined. However, Real Madrid are still Real Madrid, winners of four ...
Nobody Enjoyed PSG's Beatdown Of Manchester United More Than Ángel Di María
Manchester United hosted Paris Saint-Germain in the Champions League today. PSG winger Ángel Di María once enjoyed a brief and ignominious tenure at United. These two facts made for a predictably tetchy atmosphere at Old Trafford, with the United fans wanting to express their still simmering anger a...
Sergio Agüero Is The Greatest Premier League Goalscorer Ever
Sergio Agüero scored three goals in Manchester City’s 6-0 evisceration of Chelsea on Sunday. He was the team’s best player on the day, just as he has been all season long and indeed for the duration of his eight record-breaking seasons in the Premier League. For as routine as the Argentine hitman ha...
Two Good Bayern Munich Fans Thwart A Dickhead's Attempted Jersey Thievery
A little Bayern Munich fan’s dream was almost dashed this weekend when defender Joshua Kimmich came over to toss the kid his jersey, only for a rude man to reach out and snag it. Thanks to the help of Kimmich and two other justice-minded fans nearby, though, the culprit was immediately shown the err...
Police Confirm That The Body Of Cardiff City Striker Emiliano Sala Has Been Found
The weeks-long search and rescue mission for the plane that disappeared in the English Channel while carrying new Cardiff City striker Emiliano Sala late last month has come to its tragic endpoint: Dorset Police have confirmed in a statement that they found the body of the 28-year-old Argentine in ...
David De Gea Is Proof That Goalkeepers Should Embrace The Kick Save
You can not read the book on goalkeeping because the book does not exist, and that is for the better. A book might be helpful for outlining fundamentals and common techniques, but it might also be an anchor drowning effectiveness in a pool of orthodoxy, a dagger sacrificing creative problem-solving...
Christian Pulisic Finally Played And Scored The Type Of Goal That Made Him Worth $73 Million
Christian Pulisic hasn’t been having the best time in this, his final season at Germany’s Borussia Dortmund before his record-breaking transfer to Chelsea becomes official. He had only made two substitute appearances for the Black and Yellow since the transfer was announced, and though he did get a ...
Tearful Neymar Asks An Indifferent God For Better Bones
After breaking the fifth metatarsal in his right foot for the second consecutive year, Neymar would be well within his rights to retreat into the rich person’s equivalent of a dark bedroom with the curtains drawn—so, I don’t know, Dubai?...
José Mourinho Eats Shit At Russian Hockey Game
Unemployed soccer manager José Mourinho is currently in Russia for some reason, and decided to take in a KHL game today. While performing the pre-game ceremonial puck drop, Mourinho managed to do in his first appearance on ice what it usually takes him three seasons to do when coaching a soccer team...
Qatar Tuned Up For The 2022 World Cup By Winning The Asian Cup For The First Time
On Friday, the Qatari national soccer team did what it had never done before, beating Japan 3-1 in the final of the Asian Cup to claim its first continental trophy ever....
Arda Turan Faces Up To 12 Years In Prison For Allegedly Trying To Steal A Pop Star's Girl, Getting Into A Fight, And Firing A Gun In A Hospital
Arda Turan, previously seen on pristine European pitches starring for Atletico Madrid and then sucking for Barcelona, might be headed to a decade-long stay in Turkish prison, per a Marca report. As a result of an October nightclub altercation in Istanbul that turned into so much more, Turan is begin...
Lionel Messi's Tap-In Completes The Platonic Ideal Of A Barcelona Goal
If you were to diagram out the most quintessentially Barcelona goal imaginable, you could do a lot worse than this tie-killing, overly intricate, senselessly gorgeous combination between about half the Barça team that saw Lionel Messi teed up to blast the ball into the net from point-blank range....
Tottenham Are A Fairy Tale In Search Of A Happy Ending
When will Spurs quit messing around and finally win something? That is the question flying around North London like an arrow aimed at Mauricio Pochettino and Tottenham’s upper-management this week after the club fell out of both domestic cup competitions, succumbing to the injury crisis even the mos...