seattle Page 55 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jay Buhner Totally Called Mike Carp's Home Run Last Night
Buhner, the goateed outfielder-turned-occasional-broadcaster for Mariners games, did little more than deploy a little hopeful homerism here. But he timed it perfectly....
Pitcher, Batter Reconcile HBP Over Twitter: "Just Grazed The Schnaz A Little Bit"
This is a beautiful story of modern reconciliation. Last night, Toronto's Brandon Morrow hit Mariner Casper Wells with a pitch. The outfielder was forced to sit out the remainder of the game, which deprived him of the chance to extend his home run streak to five straight games....
Ichiro's Doppelganger Tried To Sabotage The Mariners Last Night
Have we not yet learned our lesson, America? Is Bartman's ultimate cautionary tale still not enough? Let the players make their plays. Even if you happen to look eerily similar to one of them....
Rest In Peace, Guy Who Enthusiastically Sold Peanuts At Mariners Games
Rick Kaminski, a 67-year-old man who provided a memorable part of the baseball experience to crowds at the Kingdome and Safeco Field in Seattle, died of complications from a brain aneurysm yesterday. He was known as "Rick the Peanut Guy," and he'll be missed....
The Incomparable Ichiro Swings Through
Two surefire Hall of Famers played in the Bronx last night. One is having the worst season of his career at 37 years old, hitting nearly 60 points off his lifetime average, and still getting paid $17 million. The other one is Derek Jeter....
Spencer Hawes Honors The Seattle SuperSonics With A Terrible Haircut
The people of Seattle will go to great lengths to honor their former team. They will heckle billionaires. They will refuse free, courtside seats to the NBA playoffs. And they will shave an outline of the Seattle Space Needle into the backs of their heads....
Dancing Kid Absolutely Kills "Thriller" At Mariners Game
One day, many centuries from now and possibly never, the world will have had enough of the "Thriller" renditions, and they will cease to delight us all. Today is not that day. There's a good chance that this particular take, which was shot during a game at Safeco Field last week, was a Mariners PR...
There's A New Shawn Kemp In Town, Seattle
Shawn Kemp, Jr. (not pictured), a 6'9" center from Canton, Georgia has signed with the Washington Huskies and has already started classes at the university. It's not the Sonics, but it is a Kemp. [ESPN]...
Our Simple Guide To MLB Realignment, Or: Sorry Seattle, You're Losing Another Team
Do it geographically. Had to split up that raging Orioles/Nationals rivalry, but this is the easiest way to go. Oh, and I had to move the Mariners to Oklahoma City. I hope that doesn't bother anyone....
Watch Eric Hassli's MLS Goal Of The Year
One might wonder, the first time one sees hockey or soccer, why the players don't bank goals in off the post at all times—the goalies can never save them. Here's one of the prettiest examples you'll ever see, from Eric Hassli of the Vancouver Whitecaps. From outside the penalty box, on a quick rec...
Guess Which City Is Having A Pearl Jam Bobblehead Night?
The Seattle Mariners are hosting the Rays on Friday evening, and because they already had a bobblehead night for Felix Hernandez, they have no choice but to start honoring local grunge rockers. Friday night is Mike McCready night at Safeco Field, which also happens to overlap with a benefit night fo...
Seattle Goes Streaking
Not one, not two, not three, but four enterprising and besotted Seattleites decided to run on the field in a single game this weekend. One even took the streaking part literally. (Warning: video provides copious-yet-blurry shots of bare man-ass, and the towel does eventually fall off.) And once ag...
Here's A Photo Of The Seattle Mariners Streaker In The Loving Grasp Of Three Committed Security Guards
On a night when Chone Figgins lowered the price of Widmer beer at one Seattle bar to $1.97 (0-5 in the Mariners win over the Yankees), a streaker was the third of four fans to run on the field. He apparently took a shine to Derek Jeter in the eighth inning but the shortstop declined his advances. F...
Chone Figgins's Low Batting Average Helps People Get Drunker, Cheaper
Seattle Mariners third baseman Chone Figgins is currently batting .202 on the season. Hitting a notable .087 this past week, manager Eric Wedge sat Chone on the bench for last night's game against the Yankees. There's chatter of moving him down in the lineup; like No. 9 down....
Seattle-Area Cheerleaders Up To Their Old Diapered, Hot-Dog-Slappin' Tricks
Scene: waning springtime in the Seattle metro area. Local cheerleaders, presumably led by Parker Posey, now up to no good with the school year coming to an end, their youth and beauty fading. Their tools: diapers and hot dogs....
Shawn Kemp Refuses Courtside Seats To Oklahoma City Game; Remains Seattle's Hero
Shawn Kemp has been retired from professional basketball for about eight years now, but after eight seasons with the SuperSonics, he still lives in the Seattle area and makes time for a weekly appearance on local sports radio with the "Ian Furness Show" on KJR. In yesterday's show, Kemp shared tha...
Time For Yet Another Team To Roll The Dice With Milton Bradley
Oh god, that's awful, I'm sorry. Let's try this again....
Here's Your MLB Play Of The Season As Ryan Raburn Assists A Home Run
That's Detroit's Ryan Raburn with the Cansecoesque slap assist on Miguel Olivo's fly ball to left. Ryan, you have joined the immortals. [MLB.com]...
Sportswriters Struggle With Turns Of Phrase For Franklin Gutierrez's Spastic Pooping
At least Franklin Gutierrez now knows what caused all of his stomach problems for nearly a full year. Gutierrez visited the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota earlier this week, where he was diagnosed with irritable bowel syndrome as the cause of his stomach issues that first popped up last summer....
NBA Selects Man Who Relocated The Sonics And Lied About It To Head Relocation Committee
It gets worse for Sacramento. David Stern has appointed Clay Bennett, second-most hated man of Seattle and 2008 Oklahoman of the Year, to lead its Relocation Committee. The deadline for the Kings decision has also been extended to May 2....