shit Page 32 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Five-Year-Old Knicks Fan Devastated By Jeremy Lin's Departure Gets To Video-Chat With Jeremy Lin
I'm not going to say there's any one moment of this video that's particularly noteworthy, but catch any clip of this nine-minute segment* and you can't help but wonder why the shitbag Knicks management would let a guy like Lin move to another team under any circumstance. Sure, his time in New York...
Jumping 10-Foot-Long Mako Shark Makes Fishermen Completely Lose Their Shit
Contrary to its name, participants in the Flying Mako fishing tournament don't usually expect to see crazed, flying mako sharks when they try to nab top honors in this strictly catch-and-release contest. However, Alex Beck, Mark Martin, and Keith Langford (the cameraman) captured footage of a 10-f...
Female Russian Skydiving Team Sets World Record With 88-Member Jump
Apparently, there's a women's skydiving team based in Russia called "Pearls of Russia," and each of them seems to be incapable of processing normal human emotions, including fear, tension, or sound judgment. Even more astonishing is that this wasn't their first or second attempt, but rather a thir...
Ichiro Traded To The Yankees
Yikes. The YES Network's Jack Curry reports that the Yankees have traded for Ichiro Suzuki. The Mariners will receive minor league starter D.J. Mitchell and reliever Danny Farquhar. The Yankees are currently in Seattle, so expect him to don the pinstripes road grays against his old team tonight. We ...
Feeding Seagulls Laxatives Ends Exactly As Expected
This is terrible. If you've ever had a bird shit on you, you know this. It once happened to me, actually—my fault for going to Shea Stadium....
Your Rob Gronkowski On The Cover Of "The Body Issue" Photoshop Roundup
Your twisted imaginations never let us down. Which is why we couldn't wait to see what you might do with this image of Rob Gronkowski on the cover of ESPN The Magazine's "The Body Issue." We put out the call on Tuesday, and this is the best of what you had to offer. Thanks, you guys....
Columnist Who Did Joe Paterno's Full-Of-Shit Last Interview Now Agrees Paterno Was Full Of Shit
The Washington Post's Sally Jenkins scored the last interview of Joe Paterno's life. In it, Paterno said—among other things—that he "had never heard of rape and a man." Our Drew Magary said, after reading that interview, that Joe Paterno was full of shit. Jenkins avoided such condemnations....
Black Hawk Helicopter Pilot Survives 50-Foot Fall During Alaskan Mountain Race
At 12:50 pm on July 4, photographer Carol Griswold captured this amazing photograph of 34-year-old Penny Assman, a Black Hawk helicopter pilot from Utah who served two tours in Iraq, coming to the conclusion of a 50-foot slide-and-fall during the annual Mount Marathon footrace. Basically, everyone r...
HOLY SHIT GIANT CROCODILE
After two years, two deaths, several injuries, and countless sleepless nights and pooped sarongs, Lolong the crocodile was captured in the Philippines last fall. This week he's been officially certified as the world's largest saltwater crocodile, at 20.24 feet and 2,370 pounds....
Tony La Russa: Asshole Or Dipshit? Let's Discuss!
Tony La Russa was never the cuddliest of MLB managers, and he's done a lot of things that would preclude him from ever being invited to anyone's Christmas party. But the big question remains, is La Russa a dipshit or an asshole? Let's settle this in the discussion section below....
Today's Ukraine-France Match Is Delayed Because God Is Angry
Hellfire is raining in Donetsk, where the Euro 2012 Ukraine-France match is delayed due to heavy rain and lightning, some of which appears here to have attempted to find its way inside the stadium. (That ain't sunlight.) Clearly Thor is angry Norway failed to qualify....
![We Have A Winner For The Dumbest Story Ever Written About Derek Jeter [NSFW?]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17po8uagmcz3wjpg.jpg)
We Have A Winner For The Dumbest Story Ever Written About Derek Jeter [NSFW?]
We asked you on Monday, after a particularly objectionable item ran in the New York Post, to write the dumbest story ever about Derek Jeter. You did not let us down. ...
Open Thread: Can You Write The Dumbest Story Ever About Derek Jeter?
Earlier today I suggested that Brian Lewis's New York Post piece today was the dumbest thing written about Derek Jeter....
Twins Fans Grasp Coprophilia-Based Humor Better Than Any Other MLB Fanbase
Francisco Liriano fell to 1-7 on the season as the Cubs rocked the Twins in Minneapolis Sunday. While some Minnesota fans think the team as a whole is playing like shit, insiders point to the crappy performance by several players—Liriano and fellow pitcher Carl Pavano among them. Don't count the Tw...
Today In Photograph And Caption Synergy: Caroline Wozniacki Shits A Return
Maybe she had a stomach bug? Maybe she was tired of all the 40-all scores? Whatever the reason, Woz laid a stinker on the court at the French Open today and was ousted by Estonian Kaia Kanepi, 6-1, 6-7 (3-7) 6-3....
College Baseball Player Leaps Clear Over The Wall To Make Ridiculous Game-Saving Catch
According to the video uploader, this full-extension-over-the-outfield-wall catch came in the ninth inning with two outs, one man on and Lower Columbia hanging on to a two run lead—meaning, the home run would have tied the game. Lower Columbia's left fielder goes totally horizontal to snag the no-...
Watch This Girl Crush A Red Bull Can Using Only Her Shoulder Blades
People ... this video. THIS VIDEO. I don't even know what to say. Reader Kenneth attempts to provide context:...
Stephen Strasburg and Some Other Guy Hit Back-To-Back Home Runs
Stephen Strasburg went yard this afternoon in the bottom of the fourth against the Baltimore Orioles. It came directly after Jesus Flores hit a home run making it back-to-back (and a belly-to-belly, some might say) home runs. It was Strasburg's first career home run....
Idea For Disney Film About Pittsburgh Pirates: <em>Feces In The Outfield</em>
A sewer line underneath PNC Park clogged, presumably with semi-digested Primanti Bros. sandwiches and broken dreams. Workers had to dig a hole in the outfield to get at the pipes, and will presumably have it repaired before the Bucs return from a road trip and Andrew McCutchen plunges into a chest-d...
Rays Infielder Will Rhymes Passed Out After Being Hit By A Pitch Tonight [UPDATE]
A horrifying scene unfolded at Tropicana Field in the bottom of the eighth inning of tonight's Rays-Red Sox game as Tampa Bay infielder Will Rhymes collapsed on the field after being hit on the arm by a pitch from Boston's Franklin Morales....