soccer Page 151 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
MK Dons Score Gorgeous Goal While Bossing Manchester United
Milton Keynes Dons of League One—that's the league below the league below the Premier League—put a goddamn hurting on Manchester United in a League Cup match today, beating them 4-0 to the delight of nearly everyone in the world. Here is the third and prettiest goal of the match, featuring some deft...
Ain't No Liga Like The One I Got: Your 2014-15 La Liga Preview
Here we are. The La Liga season has just started up, and now we get to watch the league with the world's three best players, its two best teams, and the saddest hodgepodge of patsies since Enter the Dragon. In spite of these financial realities, Spain managed to produce Europe's wildest title race...
<em>FIFA Weekly's</em> Sepp Blatter Profile Is A Marvel Of Propaganda
This week's edition of FIFA Weekly, a magazine that exists, for some reason, contains a short profile of FIFA president Sepp Blatter. It is one of the most rank and shameless pieces of propaganda ever committed to print. ...
MLS Used A Blind Draw To Decide Where Jermaine Jones Will Play
In one of those "only in MLS" stories—and not one of the charming ones, either—World Cup standout Jermaine Jones is now a member of the New England Revolution, but only because the Revs' name came up in a random draw....
Cameroonian Soccer Player Dies After Fan-Thrown Object Hits Him In Head
Albert Ebosse was pronounced dead shortly after his team lost to USM Alger in the Algerian football championship. Fans allegedly threw rocks on the pitch as both teams were heading for the locker rooms after a 2-1 win over JS Kabylie. Ebosse was hit in the head and taken to the hospital in Tizi Ouzo...
Athletic Bilbao Robbed Of Equalizer From Goalkeeper, Lose To Malaga
Athletic Bilbao appeared to steal a tie from the jaws of defeat with a goal in stoppage time off a set-piece header from their keeper, Gorka Iraizoz. After the initial frenzy, it was disallowed for no apparent reason. Malaga hung on to win, 1-0....
Did Mesut Özil Actually Suck Last Year? Whose Fault Was That?
It was easy to blame Mesut Özil, because it's easy to blame any athlete for anything. But last year, it was particularly easy to blame Mesut Özil. He arrived under the halo of his record £42.5 million fee at Arsenal, implicitly anointing him Savior, a title that almost always preempts failure....
Mauro Zárate Drills Home Magnificent Volley Off The Deflection
West Ham United took a 1-0 lead on Crystal Palace today when Mauro Zárate—in his first start for a new squad—lined up a volley after a sky-high deflection of a shot from teammate Mark Noble....
Premier League Text Message Scandal Is Making Everybody Stupid
May you never have to be defended by Harry Redknapp. ...
What An Enormous Boner
Peruvian side Universidad César Vallejo took a 2-1 lead into the half against Colombian squad Millonarios in Copa Sudamericana action tonight thanks to the enormous boner of Millonarios keeper Luis Enrique Delgado....
Kid Asks Jamie Carragher The Only Luis Suárez Question Worth Asking
A kid at a soccer camp asked Jamie Carragher, former Liverpool teammate of the bitey Luis Suárez, if Suárez ever sank his teeth into him. Carragher gave no answer except for a laugh. Kid should have followed up....
Turkish Soccer Fans Honor Mike Brown
[Besiktas fans at today's Champions League qualifying match against Arsenal hold up a sign in honor of Mike Brown, the unarmed 18-year-old who was shot dead by police in Ferguson, Missouri, last week. Photo by Ehran Aladi/Getty]...
How Chelsea's Missing Piece Fell Into Their Lap
Yesterday, Chelsea kicked off their season against Premier League minnows Burnley. When the match started, their new, star midfielder Cesc Fàbregas looked strange, out of place donned in blue. He didn't seem like he fit. ...
Chelsea, <em>Hot Damn</em>
It's too early to declare something a goal of the year contender...right?...
The 49ers' New Stadium Is Probably The Future Of Concessions
Yesterday saw the 49ers' very first game at their new home, Levi's Stadium, and if you had to pick one quote from a fan to summarize the tens of thousands of opinions out there, it'd be the one the Chronicle got from one season-ticket holder: "I live in San Francisco, so it's a little far. But t...
Something Disgusting Happened In Ashley Young's Mouth
It's hard to say exactly what this is that flies directly into Ashley Young's mouth—many on Twitter say it's bird shit, which should make you want to eat Clorox wipes for a week—but even if it's just human spit, it's equal parts amazing and gross. ...
West Ham Idiot Runs Length Of Pitch, Takes Free Kick For Spurs
An Idiot On The Field invaded the pitch at Upton Park today, and made the most of his time in the spotlight: he took a crucial free kick for the visiting Tottenham Hotspur....
This Isn't Your Club's Year: Our 2014-2015 Premier League Preview
Woohoo, soccer people. We're back....