soccer Page 230 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Today In "Bizarre" Injury Ledes
Swansea defender Alan Tate has broken his leg in what his club have described as a "bizarre golfing accident." Tate was a passenger in a golf buggy at a south Wales club on Sunday when the buggy "lost control," Swansea said." [Daily Mail] (H/T Tomuban)...

Manchester United Actually Kicked Arsenal's Soul's Ass Today, Too
Man U 8, Arsenal 2. That's a lot of goals. Wayne Rooney had three of them. But Ashley Young, he had a really pretty one....

Brave TV Reporter Gets A Mouthful Of Sewage-Seasoned Sea Foam To Seize The Big Story
Your morning roundup for Aug. 28, the day we give a shout out to aquatic fleas. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors. (Want more Tucker Barnes? Here.)...

Soccer Hooliganism In Switzerland Features A Lot Of SWAT-Team Intimidating Violence
You'd have been forgiven if you didn't think the land that gave us Roger Federer and Toblerone white chocolate was capable of bottle-throwing, stick-swinging, flare-wielding, mace-throwing, cop-scaring hooliganism....

Didier Drogba Got Knocked Out Cold During Today's Chelsea Match
From the looks of things, Didier Drogba was unconscious before he hit the ground after getting a head shot from Norwich City's goalkeeper. He was down with an apparent head and/or neck injury for a while, to the point that there were 11 extra minutes in the second half of Chelsea's 3-1 victory....

Let's Watch Cesc Fabregas Score His First Highlight-Reel Goal For Barcelona
Your morning roundup for Aug. 27, the day Chevy Chase's resurgence finally got to Dan Aykroyd, but not necessarily to Bill Murray, because Bill Murray knows he's better than Ghostbusters 3. This, because he unequivocally is. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Player Reacts To Getting Red Carded In Uruguay By Pimp-Slapping The Linesman
In a recent Uruguayan Primera Division match between the mighty Montevideo Wanderers and Danubio, Brazilian striker Diogo was issued a red card for kicking a foe, etc. Fair enough. However, Diogo apparently didn't take to kindly to somethingorother the "humble" linesman did, so Diogo give 'im a sm...

Rival Soccer Players Know To Expect That Newcastle United's Joey Barton "Will Come In Your Face"
If your tongue absolutely, positively must slip during a sports interview, why not sound as if you're talking sexually when, in fact, you're talking about a rival's tenacity on the English Premier League pitch? This is what happened to Fulham's Philippe Senderos when asked about Newcastle United's...

Confused Old Man On A Rascal Tries To Run Over Referee
A lively old man on a Rascal (also known as a wheelchair, mobility scooter, or Jazzy, depending on your local parlance) nearly took out a referee in a game between FC Oss and Almere City in the Netherlands on Friday night. Edwin van der Graaf reportedly handed out six yellow cards to Oss, the home...

Samir Nasri Will Not Score Until April
City closed the deal with their 40 million dollar man today, and to celebrate, they had EA Sports put together an image of Nasri scoring his first goal, using the upcoming FIFA 12. Nasri appears to have slipped past Vidic and a very out-of-position Rooney, and City fans probably cannot wait for this...

Samuel Eto'o Will Leave Inter Milan For Obscure Russian Club (And Billions Of Rubles)
Samuel Eto'o, the 30-year-old Cameroonian soccer player, is leaving the glitz and prestige of Serie A's Inter Milan to play "for an obscure club in the violence-wracked Caucasus region of Dagestan, Russia." From Milan, one of the world's fashion capitals, to Dagestan: the land of the mountains. This...

This Gaddafi's Soccer Career Is Probably Over
It's being reported this morning that opposition forces have captured Al-Saadi Gaddafi, the third son of the soon-to-be outgoing dictator. It's a great day for the people of Libya, but a sad day for Serie A. A conviction at the International Criminal Court would likely prevent Saadi from adding to h...

Houston Dynamo's Stoppage-Time Goal Causes Their Announcer To Orgasm On Air
Perhaps you might react with some skepticism to this man's gleeful shrieking: after all, the win only brought Houston to 8-7-11, and Real Salt Lake isn't one of the MLS's top teams....

Here's Video Of The Time Gunfire Interrupted A Mexican Soccer Match
Per @rev215: "Here's bad quality video of players running off the field & fans taking cover as shots are fired in Mexican soccer game"...

Let's Watch Oscar's Hat Trick In Brazil's 3-2 U20 World Cup Win, But Especially The Third Goal
Oscar's 111th-minute U20 World Cup winning strike was really something to see. Fast forward to 10:45. Rejoice in the magic. Then, watch the rest. Brazil 3, Portugal 2....

Spanish Soccer Club Goes The Sperm-Bank Porn Route To Sell Season Tickets (NSFW)
It's probably difficult to cultivate much of a season-ticket fan base when you're a soccer team in the Madrid suburbs. This is Getafe FC's burden. This is Getafe FC's blessing....

One Team Scored Its First English Premier League Goal In 15 Years Today, And It Was Against Tim Howard
In its second game back in the English Premier League after a relegation stint in the Division 1 hinterlands, Queens Park Rangers got its first victory today, defeating Everton 1-0....

Presenting Slo-Mo Video Of A Little League Player Taking A Baseball To The Face
Your morning roundup for Aug. 20, the ninth day that Delonte West will wake up hoping Home Depot calls. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors. (Video from California's 11-0 win over Rhode Island H/T Shaun B). ...

Announcer Is Sorry His "One-Eyed Jimmy" "Just Came Out"
In the most MLS injury ever, Jimmy Neilsen, the Danish goalkeeper for Sporting Kansas City, was hit in the eye with a flying Omar Bravo bobblehead last night. He laid on the pitch for about four minutes, got stitched up, and returned to play in a 3-1 win over Portland....

Clint Dempsey Can't Stop Scoring Goals For Fulham
Last season, Clint Dempsey became Fulham's all-time leading scorer in the Premier League era. That's pretty impressive for an American. Or a human. Dempsey is already adding to his tally. He scored twice in today's Europa League match against Ukraine's FC Dnipro. (The first one in the video isn't ...