sos Page 8 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Landon Donovan Wins Biggest Asshole Award In Dumb Soccer Fandom Controversy
If you want to learn about a completely mind-numbing “controversy” about who is and is not allowed to root for which national team at the World Cup, and in the process become more convinced that there isn’t much brain behind that enormous forehead of Landon Donovan’s, then you’ve come to the right p...

BronnyWatch: NBA Suggests One-And-Done Could Be Out As Soon As 2021
Welcome to BronnyWatch, where we track the potential NBA destinations for LeBron James Jr. ...

Sam Dekker White Pride Tweet Sparks Meet Me In Temecula Part 2
Last night, Los Angeles Clippers forward Sam Dekker tweeted how proud he was to be white, sparking a feud between two Twitter users that culminated with the Dekker-defender buying his adversary an airline ticket to Los Angeles so they could punch each other about it. It is truly as stupid as it sou...

Listen, It's The Offseason Now So We're Going To Talk About This Dumb Basketball Idea
A galaxy-brained NBA Reddit user posed a reasonable question this morning: Why can’t four Golden State Warriors link arms in a circle around Steph Curry, so that no defenders can get near him to contest his shot?...

A Dramatic Reading Of Bryan Colangelo's Resignation As GM Of The Philadelphia 76ers
Is this the stupidest thing we’ve ever put on the website? Uh, sound off in the comments I guess. I’m just really sorry about all this....

So, Can LeBron Do That Four More Times?
J.R. Smith’s inexplicable game-ending dribbling demo is and should be the thing fans remember about Game 1 of these short-looking 2018 NBA Finals, but lost in all the hubbub around Smith’s all-time brain fart is that the Cavs absolutely should have won a road game against a Warriors team that really...

After Just One Season Playing For The Knicks
Poor Enes Kanter. Once so youthful and sturdy, with a shock of the darkest, most luscious hair. Still just 26 years old, and now grey as a heavy November sky. Playing for the Knicks will age even the strongest of us prematurely, I guess....

The Dawn Staley-Missouri Beef Is Finally Over, And It Will Cost Mizzou $50,000
South Carolina women’s basketball head coach Dawn Staley settled her lawsuit against Missouri athletic director Jim Sterk on Thursday. The decision comes four months after Sterk went on a radio show and accused the Gamecocks coach of promoting a hostile fan atmosphere—back in January, when the two ...

Here Is My Super Cool Plan To Save <i>Kevin Can Wait</i>
According to a report from Jezebel (Gizmodo Media Group’s shark blog), hit CBS sitcom Kevin Can Wait has been canceled after two seasons and 48 laugh-packed episodes. This national travesty happened at some point in the last two weeks, but the loyal fan community of “Waiters” is already clamoring fo...

The Very Short Saga Of The Vladimir Guerrero Jr. Airport Picture
All right-thinking people on this planet and any others want to see Vladimir Guerrero Jr., who does very rude things to baseballs in very loud ways, called up to the majors as soon as possible. So you can imagine the excitement that was generated when Young Vlad posted this photo on Instagram:...

Dear Celtics, Please Unleash The All-Beef Lineup
Last night’s Game 1 between the Celtics and Sixers was a pretty good time. Terry Rozier looked like fuckin’ Chris Paul out there and Joel Embiid was unstoppable and Jayson Tatum did some cool whirly-bird moves that made me go, “Ooh! Nice!” But what I was most excited to see was the late-game introdu...

The All-Too-Brief Basketball Career Of Reggie Rose
On Monday night, TNT play-by-play man Kevin Harlan welcomed Reggie Rose to the NBA, excitedly shouting his name on several instances. Signed by the Timberwolves, Reggie Rose scored 17 points in a Game 4 loss to the Rockets, and somehow, in his NBA debut, already appeared to be on his last legs....

The NRA Got Mad About Coolers And Now People Are Shooting Coolers<em></em>
If you’ve spent any time in an REI or around outdoor enthusiasts of a certain economic stratum in the past several years, you have almost certainly encountered a YETI Coolers product. Their coolers are blocky, unconscionably heavy boxes that prevent ice from coming anywhere near melting, and they co...

Umpire Jerry Meals Is Small, Most Baseball Men Are Large: Physical Comedy Ensues
Umpire Jerry Meals is five feet eight inches tall. This is a perfectly respectable height, and one that has not kept him from achieving what we can presume was his lifelong dream of being a Major League umpire. Jerry Meals has made it. ...
![Let's Spend Way Too Much Time Breaking Down An Adorable Little Girl's Quest For A Puck [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/a3zmbun0k7rt8ehrsaxu.png)
Let's Spend Way Too Much Time Breaking Down An Adorable Little Girl's Quest For A Puck [UPDATE]
On Sunday, a cute little girl sitting in the money seats at the Caps playoff game banged on the glass as Brett Connolly skated by. He noticed her and tried to flip her a puck over the glass, but a dad-person behind her caught it and handed it to the young fan beside her. She was sad. The same thing ...

Shocking Video Reveals That Ronaldo And Messi Have Different Personalities
Cristiano Ronaldo vs. Lionel Messi. It’s an argument as old as time itself, with diehard fans of these two all-time greats throwing out stats and facts in support of their preferred candidate to make their case for superiority—Messianiacs pointing to his better scoring record, his better passing, hi...

MLB Season Preview: What You Need To Know For 40 Minutes Of Marlins Baseball
Aw shit yeah, buddies, it’s Opening Day! The good kind of Opening Day, too. One of those classics on which all 30 teams—well, except for the Nats and Reds and Tigers and Pirates, because their games have already been postponed—play on the same day and it’s non-stop baseball. I do have one piece of b...

Dipshit Florida Legislators’ Plan To Move To Atlantic Standard Time Will Wreak Havoc On Sports In The Sunshine State<em></em>
Florida’s heavily GOP legislature last month pushed through a bill that would move most of the state out of a daylight saving time-observing Eastern time zone and into year-round Atlantic Standard Time; Sen. Marco Rubio last week announced the plans to confirm the change in an act of Congress. This ...

Whoever Wrote Kirk Cousins's Farewell Blog Used "Vikings" And "Jets" Tags<em></em>
Kirk Cousins announced in a blog post today on KirkCousins.org that he will not return to Washington. In the blog, Cousins expresses gratitude towards the city and his teammates, and talks about getting to choose his next team for the first time in over a decade, but more importantly, whoever wrote ...

Birds Are Good
It has come to my attention that some people do not like all birds. This or that bird is not good, they are saying or thinking or blogging nearly two years ago. But actually, whatever bird they are talking about is good. Birds are good....