st-louis Page 10 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Gabriel Landeskog Beat The Shirt Off Brayden Schenn<em></em>
Just three seconds into last night’s Avs-Blues contest, Colorado’s Gabriel Landeskog and St. Louis’s Brayden Schenn decided to randomly drop the gloves and have a brawl in open ice. The initial violence in itself was 20 seconds of intensity, but the fight really heated up and came to a climax when L...
What If <i>The Purge</i>, But For Goalie Interference<em></em>
Every sport has its catch rule, a point of controversy with rules so vague or arcane or reliant on human judgment that fans, players, and even referees can have trouble defining it. In hockey these days, that’s goaltender interference, and the usual short-term solution is that we trust the officials...
Report: Marlins Continue Setting Themselves On Fire, Trade Marcell Ozuna To Cardinals
The Miami Marlins, an alleged major league club in the NL East, are carrying on with their plan to strip the franchise bare and trade off all their players worth a damn. Giancarlo Stanton is a Yankee, Dee Gordon is a Mariner, everyone else is available, and now Marcell Ozuna is a Cardinal. Jesse San...
St. Louis Cardinals Release Statement Announcing That Giancarlo Stanton Has Owned Them<em></em>
Ken Rosenthal reported Thursday that baseball murderer Giancarlo Stanton will not waive his no-trade clause for the Giants or Cardinals. (The Astros and Cubs remain in the mix, albeit behind the Yankees and Dodgers.) Stanton’s refusal to go to St. Louis wasn’t a hypothetical one, according to the Ca...
The Blues Dressed A Vending Machine Worker As Their Emergency Backup Goalie
Tyler Stewart had been working since 5 a.m. and had just finished his shift filling vending machines when he got the call: Blues backup goalie Carter Hutton had hurt his foot in the morning skate and AHL goalie Ville Husso wouldn’t be able to get there from San Antonio in time for puck drop. So Stew...
Shea Weber's 500th Point Was A Curveball
The Canadiens had looked like they’d gotten things figured out, winning five straight since the return of Carey Price from injury. (Funny how that works. You get the best goaltender in the world back in net, and he gives up six total goals in five games, and you win them all, and suddenly you’re thi...
Miles Mikolas, Noted Lizard Eater, Signs With Cardinals
Tasty stuff on the hot stove today, folks: The Cardinals have signed right-handed pitcher Miles Mikolas to a two-year deal. You may know his name from very brief stints with the Padres and Rangers from 2012 through 2014 (unlikely), or from his quite good performance in Japan over the past several ye...
For Now, It Looks Like Giancarlo Stanton Will Either Be A Cardinal Or A Giant
Giancarlo Stanton in St. Louis? Giancarlo Stanton in San Francisco? If you’re dreaming about where the defending National League MVP might end up next season, there’s no sense in dreaming any bigger than that. The Stanton sweepstakes are reportedly down to the Cardinals and the Giants, and Stanton w...
Jake Allen Is Rudely Reminded That Ice Is Slippery
Blues goalie Jake Allen was doing just fine through the first half of last night’s game against Calgary, holding down the fort while his team took a 3-1 lead. But just when you think you’re safe, that’s when some devious frozen water will turn you into a fool. While trying to play the puck behind hi...
Purity Of Cardinal Way Being Polluted By Outsiders, Says Ridiculous Column
The St. Louis Cardinals have missed the playoffs for two consecutive seasons now. Some might say this is because they’ve become a middling NL team in both offense and pitching, and that an infusion of talent might propel them upwards from those low-to-mid-80s win totals, where they will probably nee...
Cardinals Eliminated With Robbed Home Run In Extra-Innings Loss To Cubs
The Cardinals’ slim postseason hopes were officially put to rest tonight in an extra-innings loss to the Cubs, who had already clinched the division with a win over St. Louis yesterday....
Jon Lester Is Not Happy About The Nacho Man
Last night, Cubs shortstop Addison Russell crashed into the stands and absolutely destroyed an order of nachos a Cardinals fan was eating. It was hilarious! Watch it again, or watch it for the first time....
Cubs Battery Lose Their Minds Over Blown Strike Three Call
The call that got John Lackey going was a really, really bad one. With the count 2-2 against Carlos Martinez in the top of the fifth inning, Lackey threw a breaking pitch that sailed right over the middle of the plate. Catcher Wilson Contreras did a bad job framing it up, but it was a strike. Even M...
Rally Cat Now Has A Lawyer
It was all fun and games when a cat ran onto the field during a St. Louis Cardinals game earlier this month. An employee wrangled him, the cat bit him, and Yadier Molina hit a grand slam on the next pitch. Rally cat!...
St. Louis Cat Nonprofit To Cards: Bullying Us Over Rally Cat Is "Inconsistent With The Cardinals Way"
Yesterday, we brought you an update on the Cardinals’ arrogant claim to the cat that ran across their stadium field last week. A local nonprofit, St. Louis Feral Cat Outreach, is caring for the feline until the organization finds it a suitable new home—with the Cardinals as just one of “thousands” o...
Cardinals Rudely Presume Feral Cat That Ran On Field Is Team Property
The Cardinals are planning a “Welcome Home” ceremony for a cat the team is publicly calling “ours,” even though they have not yet been granted custody by St. Louis Feral Cat Outreach, the local organization currently responsible for the feline and the process of finding it a new home....
Cat Found And Jailed For Crime Of Helping Vile Cardinals
Cardinals Cat, the kitten that invaded a Royals-Cardinals game at Busch Stadium Wednesday night and inspired the Cardinals to victory, has been found. And you know what? They threw the little asshole in jail, where he belongs:...
Cardinals Cat Is Missing
Despite the efforts of two different people, the kitten that invaded Wednesday’s Cardinals game and battled a hapless team employee apparently could not be tamed. It’s on the loose....
Kitty On The Field Fights Cardinals Employee, Inspires Yadier Molina Grand Slam
A cat ran onto the field in the bottom of the sixth inning in St. Louis tonight. It was adorable, and kind of sad. Poor kitty! Then it bit a Cardinals employee trying to take it off the field, and it was pretty funny. The announcers made fun of him. Poor guy! After the employee finally wrangled the ...
Yadier Molina Tells Mike Matheny To Can It<em></em>
How mad does an All-Star catcher have to be to air out his manager on Instagram? Yadier Molina, definitely mad online, gave Mike Matheny the business after Matheny barely stopped himself from calling Molina tired—or maybe old, depending on how generous you’re feeling at the moment....