steroids Page 22 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
These Two Men Need No Longer Worry About Prison Sex
Yesterday, Troy Ellerman, the defense lawyer for BALCO founder Victore Conte, pled guilty to leaking grand jury transcripts to "Game Of Shadows" authors Lance Williams and Mark Fainaru-Wada. With his admission, it means that Williams and Fainaru-Wada won't have to go to jail after all, and Mike Lupi...
Bonds Contract: Baseball's Version Of A Constitutional Crisis?
So someone took the time to actually read the contract that Barry Bonds signed with the Giants on Monday, and they made a startling discovery. According to the fine print, Bonds not only must play both ends of any doubleheaders, he must dress as Paula Abdul in the second game. Also, there's this:...
Forever Barry
He's 43, kind of a dick and subject to a variety of ailments, including, if you believe the horse steroids charges, laminitis. But nonetheless, Barry Bonds is officially back in the fold with the San Francisco Giants, ready to tackle Mt. Aaron once again. Whew. We were on pins and needles....
Albert Belle, Still Available
It's official, folks, if you can handle it: Sammy Sosa and the Texas Rangers have agreed on a deal. Sosa will receive $500,000 on a one-year contract and will be invited to make the team out of Spring Training. It's good to see that the new Rangers manager Ron Washington is attempting to be realisti...
Apparently, There Are Blood Dopers In Cycling
So you know how Floyd Landis was tested positive for doping — kind of — after the Tour de France and they're probably going to give his title to the second place finisher? Well, turns out, that's probably not going to work either....
Bonds And The Giants Just Can't Quit Each Other
Yesterday, Barry Bonds did nobody any favors by endorsing Pete Rose and Mark McGwire for the Hall of Fame, inspiring each of them to put their paws over their face like a goldendoodle puppy. But the bigger news might be that the Giants are considering voiding Bonds' contract after the news of his po...
Marcus Giles Already Tearing Up San Diego
Marcus Giles has been a member of the San Diego Padres for less than a month; they just got the guy, for crying out loud. You thought it was a nice story, two brothers reunited — and it feels so gooood — but it turns out that it was a recipe for violence!...
Student Reporter Gets First Boring McGwire Quotes
So everybody wants to hear from Mark McGwire, the slugger-in-exile. What does he think about the Hall of Fame voting? Did he ever do steroids? What was the deal with appearing on "Mad About You?" No one has been able to get him to come out of hiding ... except for abused children, anyway. McGwire sh...
Barry Bonds Unlikely To Stay "Pals" With Mark Sweeney Much Longer
Barry Bonds has been dodging, ducking and weaving the Inspector Javerts of Major League Baseball and the U.S. government for so long that it's almost second nature to him; he has moves that would make LaDainian Tomlinson envious. According to this morning's New York Daily News — which remains three ...
Sammy Sosa-San Could Rack Up The Yen
While his old "pal" Mark McGwire is battered about on every cable channel, Sammy Sosa continues to cast about to find somewhere to peddle his wares. With the major leagues, uh, unlikely, it is only natural that he would look eastbound. And he might have found himself a winner....
Which Politicians Are Secret Roiders?
So here's an idea. Frustrated by the incessant nattering about steroids from politicians in his and every other sport, tennis player Rafael Nadal says it's time to start testing politicians for steroids....
Grandma Got Ran Over By A Syringe
As we all know, steroids are scourge on our great nation and must be eradicated before Al Qaeda uses them to take over the United States. And the menace is getting worse: Turns out, now grandmothers are using them....
Bonds Back In Only Place That Truly Loves Him
Well, now we can breathe easy over here; Barry Bonds won't be going to St. Louis. (And now that he's not, we'd like to note that we would have never sold out our principles to root for him. Nope! No way! Obviously! Of course not!)...
Bonds In St. Louis, And What It Could Mean For The Human Condition
Part of being a sports fan is making internal deals with yourself. Sure, you might despise, say, Charles Oakley when he's on the other team, but when he's on your team, he's indispensable and the guy you scream for. No matter what he has done in the past, no matter how much he has hurt your team or ...
Saints' Wheezer Nailed For Inhaler Doping
The poor soul unfortunate enough to have been caught in the extreme closeup lens of a Getty Images photographer last week, seen here, is New Orleans Saints defensive tackle Hollis Thomas, who yesterday was suspended for four games by the NFL for violating its steroid policy....
Watch Your Beer Around Carl Lewis
The first time we ever remember hearing about steroids, as far as we can recollect, was Canadian sprinter Ben Johnson, a guilty finding made all the more hilarious because he's Canadian. (Kind of.) Well, over the weekend, Johnson revealed that he has finally, 18 years later, figured out who famously...
Bill Romanowski Would Still Like To Pump You Up
Back before there was Tony Romo, God of all that he surveys, there was of course the original RoboRomo, the steroid-addled, spitting monstrosity that is Bill Romanowski. The Other Romo was considered one of the cutting edge steroid users, and he admitted using them not only to "60 Minutes" but als...
Justin Gatlin Finds A Sport That Doesn't Mind That He Uses Steroids
When your fourth wide receiver is a guy named David Anderson, it's probably not a bad idea for you to explore all possible options, but the Houston Texans are taking it to a (not really all that) new level....
The McGwire Maelstrom Is Upon Us
Well, as pretty much everyone has weighed in on now, Mark McGwire is on the Hall of Fame ballot, and it's got everybody's panties in a bunch. We typically get exhausted by Hall of Fame debates anyway — they're like regular sports debates, except it's about stuff that ended a decade ago — but this on...
Shawne Merriman's Flimsy "Excuses"
So San Diego Chargers linebacker Shawne Merriman has decided to accept his four-game suspension for steroids, while making it clear that it was an accidental positive test as a result of an over-the-counter supplement....