sting Page 16 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
One Man's TV Nightmare Is Another's Comedy Gold
Of course, when you're struggling like this, it's always helpful to have a couple of smart-ass girls in the studio mocking you relentlessly....
The Burnley Bee Will Not Tolerate Nakedness
Look, from now on, when a costumed bee tackles a naked man during an English League soccer match — and then does about a half-hour Bee Victory Dance to celebrate the feat — I want to be informed immediately. I'm just seeing this now? Inexcusable. Hirshey, or someone, will pay. Now, on with the show....
No Longer Will Your Finger Jousting Competitions Be Lawless
We've talked to you about the great sport of finger jousting before, but we are proud to report that the World Finger Jousting Federation has come up with an official set of rules. They're quite helpful....
Luis Castillo Is On That "Stuff" Again
In China they say that a hippopotamus in your swimming pool is a sign of good fortune and virility*. In San Diego it means that the poor big bastard needed to soak his shit out. Seriously, those wildfires will dry out your skin before you know it....
Who Will Be The Next Athlete To Have A Kinky Sex Fetish Revealed?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....
The Exact Human Opposite Of Jim Nantz
Ron Jaworski? Please. This is your new MNF foil for Kornheiser....
About Last Night...
• NBA Playoffs. Cavs 98, Pistons 82. I don't think Rasheed Wallace is taking this well. • MLB. Padres 11, Nationals 3. Justin Germano refuses to lose. Ever. • NHL. Senators 5, Mighty Ducks 3. Candadian pride might yet be salvaged....
Bill Clement, You Sly Son Of A Bitch
Goodness. I hope that's not how he told his mom "Happy Mother's Day."...
Welcome, Jezebel: Turn To The Worship Of Her God Baal
The classy, bombastic lovely ladies seen here are the editors of the newest site from our benevolent benefactors at Gawker Media, Jezebel, which launched today. The basic premise of the site is mapped out in a manifesto about the five biggest lies that women's magazines spew. Personally, we've alway...
Who Will Win the 2007 Scripps National Spelling Bee?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....
Lastings Milledge, Scaring All The White Mets Fans
In the annals of ridiculous Lastings Milledge photos, this one, from the New York Daily News blog, is a rather classic one: It's like if Outkast met Cliff Huxtable....
Randy Moss To The Patriots. We Still Don't Believe It.
As we await the inevitable Bill Simmons column about this — Five Tool Tool goes ahead and sums it up for us — we continue to watch our mind boggle over the notion of Randy Moss playing for the Patriots. We've never found Moss as annoying as, say, Terrell Owens, but he's hardly what we think of when ...
Farewell, Charlotte Sting
One of the WNBA's first franchises hasn't found a buyer since its owner/ operator, the Charlotte Bobcats, gave up control over the team on Dec. 13th and now, the long-legged ladies of North Carolina will no longer have a professional team to call their own. Michael Jordan=Franchise killer....
Justin Gatlin Finds A Sport That Doesn't Mind That He Uses Steroids
When your fourth wide receiver is a guy named David Anderson, it's probably not a bad idea for you to explore all possible options, but the Houston Texans are taking it to a (not really all that) new level....
What Could Possibly Go Wrong With This Idea?
Yahoo's Time Capsule Project begins today, in which people from around the world are encouraged "to submit text, images and video that reflect human nature" to be included in a message that will be beamed into space. So that the world of sports isn't left out, we are submitting the video above, whic...
The Lastings Milledge Ho-Down
We've had several people ask us this morning: Hey, how about those Cardinals? Actually, a few variations on the them, a 32 Short Films About Glenn Gould type of thing....
Americans Continue To Lead The World In Mysteriously Tainted Urine
The world's fastest man, Justin Gatlin, has failed a pee-pee test, and, stop me if you've heard this before, claims he didn't do anything wrong. Both his 'A' and 'B' samples came up positive for unusually high amounts of synthetic testosterone....
I Will Joust You With My Finger, Bitch.
It's very sadly missing from the Sunday TV sports lineup, but there is a hot new sport on the horizon. It's called Finger Jousting, and it's sweeping the... okay, it's not sweeping the nation or anything else. But they do have a website. So that's step one. Here's how the sport works:...
This Is Why Everyone Needs To Synchronize Their Swatches
In Paris, earlier today (or yesterday, or whatever that time difference is), the IAAF — perhaps the most useless acronym in sports; it stands for International Association of Athletics Federations, which is kind like saying you have a Collection of Associated Alliances — announced that sprinter Ju...