stupid Page 23 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Breaking Down The Football In <i>The Dark Knight Rises</i>
It's nerd Christmas, as the trailer for The Dark Knight Rises was released today to the orgiastic squeals of the internet. There's plenty to take in: Bane's unintelligible speech, Anne Hathaway's vie to become the first woman since Michelle Pfeiffer to actually add something to a superhero movie—b...

The Foolproof Way To Find Out How Many Women Wear Thongs
Your morning roundup for Dec. 7, the day we learned the alien search is back on. Photo via Fox DC. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Lane Kiffin Tweeted A Happy Birthday Wish To Britney Spears
Of course he did. [via]...

Update: Oddibe McDowell's Water Bill Is A Modest $59.55 This Month
Via Broward County Water and Wastewater Services....

How Many Times Have We Farted In Human History? A Very Rough Calculation
I was sitting next to my friend on a bus the other day. He farted. It got us thinking: How many farts have there been in human history?...

The Facial Expression On The World's Fastest Jump Roper Is Gold
[via The Score]...

BREAKING: ESPN's Jenn Brown Is Locked Inside A Hotel Bathroom And Is Live-Tweeting About It (UPDATED)
It's been more than 30 minutes since she called for help. We'll keep you posted. [@JennBrownESPN]...

Low-Level Sources Close To Pumpkin Ron Washington Say That Pumpkin Ron Washington Is Not Racist, Still Awaiting Word From Pumpkin
An email, received in 24-point font:...

Texas Pumpkins Accused Of Racism Over Ron Washington Blackface Costumes
Two Dallas-area pumpkins have caused a stir over their costume choices for local Halloween contests. The pumpkins, one from Irving-based 21st Century Dental (left) and the other a part of the Dawson & Sodd law firm in Corsicana (right), showed up to a statewide "pumpkin contest" dressed in the offen...

<em>SportsCenter</em> Wants You To Know What Douche B. Wilson Thinks Of LeBron Barnstorming
Just in case you were wondering. [via @LBSports]...

Attention Oddibe McDowell: Your Water Bill Is Past Due
Via Broward County Water and Wastewater Services. Earlier coverage of Oddibe McDowell's water bill:...

Hanley Ramirez Loves Shopping For A Good Bargain
Reader Adam sent us this photo of him and Hanley Ramirez. They met at a Filene's Basement in Washington, D.C. last year. This is, of course, a perk of being in this line of work. You get to see photos people took with athletes they bumped into at discount department stores a year ago. Awesome....

"I'm About Winning": Coach K Wasn't Included In Duke's Auto-Tune Song, So We Made One For Him
Mike Krzyzewski did not partake in DJ Steve Porter's Auto-Tuned "Duke Worldwide" music video, so we went into the Deadspin recording studio (it's called GarageBand and it's probably on your Mac) and mixed one ourselves....

A List Of Places Where Brett Favre Is Also Not Going, Yet
There is a special moment in the news cycle during which outlets report on things that are not happening, but that maybe could happen, but that also could not not happen because it would be so interesting if they did happen. Do you follow?...

Did These Boston People (And Inanimate Objects) Pack On The Pounds, Too? Judge For Yourself
We're expanding upon the Boston Globe's investigative work into weight gain in Boston: "Did the Red Sox pack on the pounds?" the Globe asked. Well, why stop there?...

Hank Williams Jr. Gets Much-Needed Public Support From Kid Rock
Detroit native Kid Rock celebrated in the Lions' locker room after their 24-13 win on Monday Night Football last night. "I'm Detroit 'til I die," he told gathering reporters....

Grading NBA Players On Their "LET US PLAY" Twitter Pleas
Today is last day the NBA lockout can end without missing games. Too bad. The lockout isn't ending, despite the social media screeching of various union members. The NBPA thankfully has retweeted much of that screeching solidarity. Here's how we classify it....

Belligerent Galloping Lady Demonstrates The Funniest Way To Use A Treadmill
We can't decide whether or not the belligerent gallop-jog is funnier on loop, as you'll see above, or as a single belligerent gallop-jog, which can be seen here. But this woman definitely eats elliptical girls for breakfast. Our only regret is that the tipster, Marc, did not capture the moment whe...

HOLY SHIT TOM BRADY CUT HIS HAIR
What does that face tell you? He looks guilty to me. Is this some form of self-inflicted punishment? Or is he punishing us? Did Gisele make him do it? Did Belichick make him do it? Did Jesus get jealous and make him do it? Did the Bills make him do it? Did ESPN The Magazine make him do it? Will the ...