HOLY SHIT TOM BRADY CUT HIS HAIR

What does that face tell you? He looks guilty to me. Is this some form of self-inflicted punishment? Or is he punishing us? Did Gisele make him do it? Did Belichick make him do it? Did Jesus get jealous and make him do it? Did the Bills make him do it? Did ESPN The Magazine make him do it? Will the locks be donated to a phoenix's nest on the Brady homestead in Costa Rica? Is it possible that he actually only cut the bottom part, and that on top of his head is a giant strawberry blonde mohawk? Will he never throw an interception again? Is he available to pitch for the Sox tonight? Is this the end of the world?

WHO IS TO BLAME? WHO IS TO THANK?

Just a few questions we have this afternoon.