tack Page 13 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Terrorists Ambush Sri Lankan Cricket Team
Need more depressing sports news today? How about terrorists taking their stupid fight to defenseless cricket players?...
Why Do You Make Me Hit You With This Hockey Stick?
Moon went down in a junior league (CHL) game after Oshawa Generals captain James DeLory slashed him in the knee from behind. Then DeLory rabbit-punched him in the face, but that's neither here nor there. But Greg Wyshynski over at Puck Daddy offers a different interpretation of the assault—Moon was ...
Nazi Shark Almost Claims Another Victim, Leaves Commemorative Tooth
This occurred in Pillar Point Harbor, about 20 miles from my house. From my HOUSE! Where my wife sleeps; where my children come to play with their toys ......
Idiot Fan Attacks Referee (Who Is Also A Cop)
"Rempala said, 'You can't arrest me, you're a referee,' and he pushed the trooper again...once he realized the referee he attacked really was a trooper, [he] reportedly said, 'That's not fair.'" [TimesOnline]...
Parents Beating Up Refs; How We've Missed You
This one comes from London, Ontario, and while I'm not sure what age the players are, I'm guessing they are mighty young. (I think it was Henry Kissinger who said that "hockey parents are so vicious, precisely because the players are so small.") The fight itself was largely uneventful—no charges wer...
His Ad? An Actual Attack
Matt Lindland is a former Olympic silver medalist in wrestling and a current MMA fighter for Affliction. Oh, and he's also running as a Republican for a seat in the Oregon State House. His Democratic opponent in Oregon's District 52 is Suzanne VanOrman. The Fightin' 52nd, you say? Not if Suzanne has...
Excerpt: "Boys Will Be Boys" By Jeff Pearlman
"Boys Will Be Boys", Jeff Pearlman's fascinating account of the glory days of the Cowboys dynasty is making the media rounds this week and we will happily join in to promote it. It is ridiculously entertaining. Yes, Charles Haley is the star, but there is so much more to it than just his dong-flappi...
Lima Time Returns To The States
We've had an absurd dedication around these parts with bringing you the latest developments in the career of Jose Lima. Is it his infectious ebullience on the mound? Or the fact that his wife is stacked? Hard to say. When last we heard from Lima Time, he was still whooping it up with the Kia Tigers...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while going elsewhere for your underboob......
Boston Bruins First To Adopt Five-Blade Technology
Want a close, comfortable shave while enjoying your next NHL game? First, apply a liberal amount of transmission fluid. Then make sure that your Zamboni includes the Gillette Fusion Power razor, with advanced blade technology and featuring precision trimmer for those tricky spots, like around the en...
1st Round, Nineteenth Overall: Panthers Select Jeff Otah
Let's measure the Otah draft buzz throughout his career in decibels (dB): 1) Leaves JUCO as a lanky ex-basketball player; wins starting job at Pitt (10 dB; rustling leaves) 2) Stones Chris Long repeatedly in Virginia-Pitt game (70 dB; Space Shuttle launch in your kitchen) 3) Suffers minor injury in...
Somebody Better Grab That Guy
La New Bears SS Lin Zhi-Shen completely losing his mind after a close play at first in this Friday night's 5-5 tie with the Brother Elephants, charging the first base umpire at full speed from the dugout for about 40 feet and clobbering him with his shoulder and forearm. The Umpire, no small fellow,...
The Dangerous Life Of A Red Sox Beat Reporter
The Boston sports media, as able documented here regularly, is a sniping, insular, sometimes vindictive lot, not just to the players they cover, but often to themselves. It appears now, however, that the universe is striking back....
About Last Night
What you missed while battling the Rodents of Unusual Size ... • NFL: Vikings win 20-13, oust Bears from playoff hunt. Mini-Ditka still alive, however. • NBA: Suns beat Spurs, and to add insult to injury they do it while wearing those funky orange-and-gray uniforms. • NHL: Red Wings beat Capitals 4-...
Kicking Pepperoni On The Ump
There are so many ways to express your displeasure with an umpire. You can boo; some do this quite effectively. You can send him angry letters. You can say nasty things about him on a message board. Or you can throw pizza at him....
David Beckham Is Trying Rather Hard To Make It Clear He's Tough
In a promotional photo shoot with Reggie Bush and the New Orleans Saints, David Beckham definitively illustrates, once and for all, the differences between football players and soccer players....
Grow, Controversy, Grow!
Our favorite headline of the month so far comes from Philadelphia, where jockey Victor Molina has been charged with domestic abuse. The victim? His racehorse, whom he kicked in the stomach following a race at Philadelphia Park. The headline? Jockey Short With Horse, naturally....
The Enigma That Is Billy Donovan
Well, now that lawyers are involved, we can reclassify the Billy Donovan saga from curiously entertaining to officially ugly. We'd love to know the real reason that Donovan balked on his Orlando Magic contract a mere two days after signing it; did he discover the team's troubling history of unprovok...