tennis Page 68 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ochocinco's Forebearer Is... Justin Gimelstob?
Chad Ochocinco — né Johnson, he of no further introduction — and Justin Gimelstob, he of middling tennis stature, have more in common than what hits the eye. Actually, they really don't. But they both... like Twitter?...

Anna Kournikova: Still Not A Jew
When Anna Kournikova came to Washington rocking a diamond as big as the Ritz, a freelance photographer congratulated her with a "Mazel Tov!" Kournikova's response: "I am not Jewish. Can't you see my cross?" Oy vey. [Washington Times]...

Shady Tennis Player Dies Shady Death
Mathieu Montcourt's five-week suspension for betting on tennis matches began on Monday—the same day he was found dead in a stairwell under totally non-suspicious circumstances. (Police don't suspect foul play, believe it or not.) He was 24. [AFP]...

British Press Finds Its Tragic Hero In An American
In London, sports are sport, Americans are ungracious blokes and Andy Roddick is brave, tenacious, athletic and bloody valorous. So like Hamlet, Othello and Romeo before him, Roddick naturally became the tragic hero in the British writer's five-act narrative arc....

At Wimbledon, All The Living Cars Fall Faintly On The Dead
"We were told: 'Go and reverse between these gravestones.' I thought: 'This is very odd'. But we did it and went to Wimbledon." The £20 for parking in a cemetery is split between three charities. How wonderfully macabre. [Ananova]...

It Appears Buxom Tennis Player Has Officially De-Racked Herself
SBB claims this is a picture of Simona Halep soon after her breast reduction surgery. Romania's long national nightmare is now over. [SBB]...

At Wimbledon, Court 2 Means You're Ugly
Interesting story from London's Daily Mail where they get an All England Club spokesman to admit the ladies featured on the hallowed Centre Court aren't necessarily the best players, but they are the best-looking players....

I Guess He Watched The Soccer Game Too
I'm certain there's a backstory here. I'm not certain I want to hear it. [The Rookies]...

When Tennis Players Ride The Crimson Tide
Lost in yesterday's huge win for American teenage Melanie Oudin was the loser, former world number one Jelena Jankovic. Turns out she was suffering from a malady you don't normally see on injury reports....

No One Said The Brits Weren't Picky
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Roddick Rickrolls Wimbledon, And Newspapers Care
"I busted my wife on some of her crappy music. She brought up Rick Astley. I can't deny it. It's in my iPod. I bet it's in your iPod too, so shut up!" You heard the man. [The Sun, Reuters]...

Once Again, Frank Deford Can't Hide His Horny Old Manliness
Frank Deford has always been infatuated with vivacious young tennis stars, so it's not surprising he'd offer his take on the recent ITF grunt ban considerations with a creepy I'm-typing-this-pantsless approach. SportressofBlogitude gives the porny rundown on Deford's latest column....

American Newspapers Can't Quite Afford Wimbledon Coverage
Filip Bondy reports that only eight papers — the usuals plus, uh, the S.F. Examiner? — sent tennis correspondents overseas, and some aren't even there yet. To be fair, though, that's one reporter for every 6.375 players. [Bondy via TBL]...

The Incredible Dulk Is "Splendiferously Lithe," And Other Required Reading (Update)
Simple question from an intrepid reader: "Who is Gisela Dulko and why have I never heard of her before? And by heard of, I mean seen — she just beat Sharapova in an almost happy tissue inducing match." I-Team, unite!...

What We Learned About The 2009 Wimbledon Champion
"Every tennis lover would like, someday, to play like Federer," Philippe Bouin tells Cynthia Gorney of The New York Times Magazine for this week's cover story. "But every man wants to be Rafael Nadal. Which is different."...

Wimbledon 2009 Is Very, Very Tape-Delayed
Get those bets in, because even though Wimbledon hasn't started yet, ESPN already knows who won. Doesn't matter if one of their projected winners isn't actually playing. Just trust them. TWWL is good like that. [ESPN]...

Nice Knowing You, Loud Tennis Grunter People
Tennis fans have enough crazy to distract them — crazy fans, crazy parents, Damir Dokic — so it makes complete sense for the International Tennis Federation to consider further penalizing the plain-old crazy grunters....

Simona Halep's Spanish Fans Form Facebook Group To Save Her "Pupus"
I have no idea what "pupus" are, but something tells me it has nothing to do with her ground stroke. [Facebook via Salir a Ganar/PHOTO: Tennisrulz/StephaneMartinache]...

Del Potro, To Federer, Back To Del Potro, To Federer, To Del Petro ...
The second French Open men's semi inexplicably isn't on TV. You can listen to the fifth set live on the radio ... tennis without all of that pesky seeing who hits the ball. [Radio Roland Garros]...

Serena Williams Bounced From French Open
A three-set loss to Svetlana Kuznetsova. So both Williams sisters, Maria Sharapova, the chick with the giant rack, and the shrieking girl are out of the French Open. It's almost like they're daring you to pay attention. [Roland Garros]...