test Page 35 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
What Happens When A 35-Year-Old Man Retakes The SAT?
I took the SAT a grand total of one time when I was in dipshit prep school. This was 1993. Like any other kid, I wanted to do well on the test, primarily so that I would NEVER have to take it again, but also because kids at my school were real dicks about their SAT scores. You'd hear through the gra...
Jose Canseco Will Not Play In The Mexican League Because He Can't Pass A Drug Test
When he's not periodically melting down or being the huggiest person on Twitter, Jose Canseco still plays the occasional game of baseball. Last year he was player/coach of the independent Yuma Scorpions (a position not without its risks), and this year was to be a step up in the world: the Mexican L...
FLOTUS On Board: One Reader's Boldest Experience
Ring the bells—the winner of the "My Boldest Experience" essay contest has been chosen. Behold, a tale of cargo vans and khaki pants by Deadspin reader Cameron B., who is just won a $100 AMEX card. Read and be inspired....
The Scandal Is What The Media's NCAA Scandal Cops Think Is A Scandal
We've been around the block with Yahoo's scandal hunters a time or two, but this latest scoop is really reductioing their worst absurdum into the ground:...
Your Doug Gottlieb Jerkoff Kid Photoshop Roundup
After we finally stopped laughing at that fantastic .gif of the kid who made blowjob motions last week behind ESPN's Doug Gottlieb, we knew we had to turn to you. By dangling another prize of some stupid crap from our desk, we asked for your photoshops, and once again you came through. Jim Cooke, ou...
Wanted: Your Brilliant Words In Exchange for Glory and $100
You've already read Cajun Boy's opus on the subject...now prove to the world that you, in fact, are the King of Boldness, by sending your 500-word essay/blog post/epic poem/manifesto to Deadspin at [email protected] with "My Boldest Experience" as the subject line. The best (funniest, most compe...
Science! Proves Ron Artest's Halftime Drinking Hurt His Free-Throw Shooting
Our old friends at the Harvard Sports Analytics Collective took a long-overdue look at whether Ron Artest's early-career practice of drinking Hennessy cognac at halftime hurt his play. "Sure enough during the 2001 and 2002 seasons his free-throw percentage during the third quarter was 67.21% compare...
Minor Leaguer Suspended For Refusing Drug Test Says Testers Went To The Wrong Address: "I'm 28 Years Old. I Don't Live With My Mom!"
Yesterday, MLB announced that minor leaguer Justin Dowdy is suspended for 50 games for refusing to take a drug test. Dowdy, a former White Sox pick who spent most of last season with the Giants' AAA Fresno Grizzlies, signed last month with the independent Grand Prairie (Texas) AirHogs and so will ha...
Here's How You Get A 50-Game Suspension Without Failing A Drug Test
Refuse to take one! Deceptively simple. Via Hardball Talk:...
Ryan Braun's Urine Collector Gives His Side Of The Story
Everyone has a lawyer, and everyone has a statement. Today's comes from Dino Laurenzi, Jr., the employee of Comprehensive Drug Testing responsible for collecting Ryan Braun's sample, and he'd like to clear up just what happened on that fateful October evening....
How The Doping Case Against Ryan Braun Fell Apart: One Theory
The conventional wisdom on Ryan Braun's overturned doping suspension is that it was a triumph of cautious proceduralism over substantive justice—a victory for protocol and a rare (and for my money not entirely unwelcome) defeat for the drug cops. Baseball's testing program caught a juicer, the think...
"I Didn't Really Have To Do, Like, A Ton Of Undercover Digging": Meet The 16-Year-Old Who Scooped Everyone On Ryan Braun's Mishandled Sample
Curt Hogg is a high-school junior who lives in Brown Deer, Wis. On Feb. 14, he wrote a post on his Milwaukee Brewers fan blog, Plushdamentals, reporting that Ryan Braun's PED urine test sample had been mishandled. Yesterday, the rest of the world learned that Hogg's reporting was correct: Braun avoi...
Ryan Braun Drug Test Saga Now Officially Screwball Comedy
Tom Haudricourt initially reported that Braun's appeal was based on disputing the testing procedures, not his positive test. It looks like we've got more detail, and, oh man: ...
The Slam Dunk Contest Must Now Happen Without Jeremy Lin And A Couch
Jeremy Lin was all set to help Knicks teammate Iman Shumpert at Saturday's NBA slam dunk contest. But because Shumpert has missed the team's last two games with knee tendinitis, he had to bow out. Jeremy Evans of the Utah Jazz will take Shumpert's place. And now that he's out, Shumpert revealed to ...
Photoshop Contest: That Jerkoff Kid Behind Doug Gottlieb
We can't stop marveling at the brilliant juvenile hijinks displayed last night at the Kansas State-Missouri game by the young man sitting directly behind Doug Gottlieb, which our own Tim Burke so memorably captured in a .gif we posted this morning. But there's no reason for the fun to stop there; t...
There's A White Guy In The Slam Dunk Contest
Fair warning: the lineup for the dunk contest at All-Star weekend is out, and it is uninspiring. You've got Indiana's Paul George, Minnesota's Derrick Williams, New York's Iman Shumpert (assisted by Jeremy Lin), and Houston's Chase Budinger. The superstars won't do these kinds of competitions any mo...
Jeremy Lin Will Be In The Slam Dunk Contest, Sort Of
What? You thought Linsanity wasn't going to be part of all-star weekend? David Stern knows a good thing when he sees it and, this morning, the NBA confirmed that Lin will participate in the Haier shooting stars competition, making the Knicks guard eligible to help out his teammate Iman Shumpert, who...
Kobayashi Almost Pukes, Smiles At The Cameras, Obliterates Wing Bowl Record
Philadelphia's biggest eaters didn't stand a chance this morning against the superhuman maw of Takeru Kobayashi, who set a new Wing Bowl record by eating 337 chicken wings. The old record of 255 wings—set last year by Joey "Super" Squibb—was doomed by the end of the second round, making the final a ...
Jose Bautista Might Have Been Exaggerating When He Said He's Been Tested For PEDs 16 Times In Two Years
At a banquet in the Dominican Republic last week, Bautista said he had undergone 16 PED tests in the past two seasons—since his power binge began. Yahoo's Jeff Passan reports today that this isn't strictly true, and the actual number is "not even in the ballpark" of 16....
Metta World Peace Is Bored
The former Ron Artest's game is slipping. His numbers are down, and even his trademark defense isn't what it once was. Is it because he's 32 now? It is because he arrived for training camp out of shape after spending the offseason changing his name, doing stand-up, and texting his dong? Nope. World...