the Page 905 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Coach Raids John Daly's Wardrobe For Retina-Bleaching Suit
The coach of the Morehead State women's team wanted a way to grab attention to help recruiting. His solution? Well, you see the photo....

Ezequiel Lavezzi Channels The Spirit Of Ketsbaia, Somersaults Into The Advertising Boards
Ninety-fourth-minute winners are always likely to give birth to some unique celebrations. Ezequiel Lavezzi's kamikaze assault on the advertising boards during the Napoli/Cagliari clash on Wednesday didn't disappoint, showing shades of Temuri Ketsbaia's half-naked rampage at St. James Park in '98....

A Behind-The-Scenes Look At The Making Of A Sexy Los Angeles Rams Music Video In 1986
The 1980s were good for a lot of things, but there was perhaps no greater innovation of that decade than football teams recording theme songs. "The Super Bowl Shuffle" is widely considered the high point, but what was the genre's nadir?...

Chinese Keeper Wang Dalei Savages Fans In Internet Post: "You Bunch Of Morons"
Chinese international goalkeeper Wang Dalei (or "Big Thunder") has been suspended indefinitely by the Chinese FA after laying into the country's fans following a 3-0 whooping by Japan in an Asian Games group match on Monday....

ESPN Book Promises To Reveal "The Rowdiest Frathouse In Sports TV"
So we happened to get our grimy little hands on the Little, Brown's catalog that teases the upcoming Shales/Miller oral history of the Worldwide Leader. It appears to promise many more casualties than our ESPN Nagasaki attack....

Bayer Leverkusen’s Sidney Sam Scores An Absolute Pearler
And Sidney's wasn't even the best name on show in Leverkusen's 3-1 win over Kaiserslautern on Sunday — this crack canceled out an opener from defender Florian Dick....

Derek Jeter Is A Gold Glover, Somehow (UPDATE)
There are no words. It's as if Joe Morgan left a giant turd on the carpet on his way out the door. [HardballTalk]...

Young Philip Rivers Did Not Make Funny Faces, Apparently Wanted To Play For The Bears
"I discovered I went to elementary school with Phillip [sic] Rivers (he's 2 years older)," wrote commenter Gottliebs Cards. "If anyone is interested I'll scan some pics." Interested? You bet your ass we're mildly kind of halfway interested....

Theo Walcott Is A Published Author Of Children’s Literature
Inspired by the heroes in his favourite bedtime stories, Arsenal striker Theo Walcott, aged 9¾, has written a series of kids’ books whose lead character is loosely based on the forward himself....

The Woozy, Loogie-Hocking Aftermath Of The New York City Marathon: A Video
Finishing a marathon is an amazing accomplishment. It is also, as that David Fleming story reminded us, a rather dehumanizing and soul-crushing endeavor. As far as we know, the New York City Marathon was poop-free this year, but wobble-free? Not at all....

Arsene Wenger Responds To Allegations Of Affair With French Rapper Sonia Tatar
Arsene Wenger has released a statement addressing allegations published in the The Sun this morning that the 61-year-old Arsenal manager has been having a two year affair with "glamorous French rap star" Sonia Tatar, 39....

How To Win While Losing, And Vice Versa: Zab Judah Says Goodbye
NEWARK—Losing is half of boxing. The more interesting half. Some losers are tragic, searching for something they'll never find. Some are noble. But only one loser can do it quite like Zab....

Things Are Getting Really, Really Weird In Carolina
The 34-3 loss to New Orleans is one thing. An expected thing. But what's going on in this picture tipster Bryan R. just sent? Don't tell me there's a water bottle hidden behind random dude's head, either. There ain't....

Here's Video Of "Possibly The Best Defender In The NFL" Taking a Ball To The Face
As of this dispatch, the Jets are down 20-10 to the mighty Detroit Lions. Was this foretold in pregame warmups?...

Hulk Hogan: I Didn't Show My Genitals To My Daughter
In a 12-second video provided to "best friend" Bubba The Love Sponge, former professional wrestler Hulk Hogan tries to make the case that he didn't flash his junk seconds after his daughter Brooke was bump-grindin' in a hotel room....

Chinese Football Coach Studies Genitals In Order To Find The Next Messi
We've checked our calendar and apparently it's not April 1st for a while yet. Still, that hasn't stopped Chinese newspaper Yangtze Evening Post running a story on a new scouting method for young Chinese football stars — genital assessment....

Pat Burrell Hook-Up Stories Are Plentiful, Apocryphal, And (Literally) Full Of Shit
Welcome back to Deleted Scenes. If you're new, read this to figure out what we do here. If not, well, let's get down to business....

Prep Schoolers Up In Arms Over Plebeian Reporter Pointing Out That Their Crappy Football Team Sucks
The Sidwell Friends football team has been outscored 373-43 this season. When Washington City Paper columnist Dave McKenna pointed that out, he learned that the school's tony pansies are way feistier on the Internet than they are on the field....

Is This The Machine Or An Imposter On The Tonight Show?
Click to view Brian Wilson took his routine to The Tonight Show last night and—among other things—introduced The Machine to the Jaywalking-loving audience (around the 3:30 mark). Either Pat Burrell gained weight, or we have a whole new mystery on our hands....

Knifepoint Cunnilingus And A Fishy Scent
I don't want to spoil the surprise, but I really think you should check this out....