Here's Video Of The Time Brian Wilson Made Lopez Tonight Watchable For Nine Minutes
Brian Wilson, San Francisco Giants closer and medium through which people can communicate with The Machine, went on George Lopez's television show the other night. He was dressed like a boat captain. Likes: Old Spice and Red Lobster. Dislikes: Water.
At one point, Lopez says, "Speaking of seamen, you went in the off-season to Thailand." To which Brian Wilson responds, "Sure did. Heh heh. Well, I did do some activities that I'm proud of. I did what any normal, 28-year-old single male would do in a foreign country. I had a lot of massages. No, let's not get out of ourselves, my man. They were strictly sexual. I don't think that's what I meant to say. They were consentual."
Then, Lopez gets into "release" which makes Wilson think "he gets it."
That's when they start talking about The Machine.
**** Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. You the type of people make the club get crunk.
MLB Playoff Picture: Biggest Races to Watch on Final Weekend
The Numbers Behind Raul Rosas Jr.’s First UFC Main Event
Browns Defense Is Struggling Without Myles Garrett
6 Most Underrated NBA Teams Heading Into the 2026-27 Season
- Indiana vs. Northwestern Prediction: Best Bets To Start Week 4
- UFC Vegas 121 Betting Splits: Where the Sharp Money Is Landing This Weekend
- Diamondbacks vs. Padres Friday Best Betting Picks and Predictions
- MLB Best Bets Today: 3 Picks for Thursday September 24 Slate
- College Football Week 4 Picks: 3 Best Bets for Saturday
- Best Bets for Falcons vs. Packers Thursday Night Football
- MLB Best Bets Today: 3 Picks for Wednesday, September 23rd

