the Page 990 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Rent a USC Song Girl for $150
The only catch is that you have to fill out a request form. Of course the form requires you to answer a few pressing questions. Such as, "What do you want the Song Girls to do?" I'm sure you can manage that. In fact, there's a good chance you were thinking of what you'd like the Song Girls to do, b...
Read Former Utah Jazz Center Mark Eaton's Screenplay: Riding the Bench
Everyone believes they have a screenplay in them. Your mom, your unemployed uncle, and anyone else who has ever watched a movie. Including 7'4 former Utah Jazz Center Mark Eaton. But most of these screenplays never see the light of day, which is fortunate. Not so with the first eight pages of Eaton...
Somewhere, Matt Leinart Is Smiling
Well, this is unfortunate. But it appears pseudonymous website proprietor "Nik Richie" of TheDirty.com was nabbed for a DUI last January and The Smoking Gun has the wince-worthy police report from the night of his arrest. Nik Richie is actually 29-year-old Hooman Karamian and, well, Jesus, let's go ...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while you figure out where the hell Rick Chandler ran off to.... • MLB: New York Yankees at Tampa Bay (7 p.m., EST): The reanimation of Carl Pavano continues as he attempts to win his third game in a row for the Yankees without having one of his body parts fall off on the mound. [ESPN]...
Floyd Mayweather Missing $7 Million In Jewelry After Robbery
Which is a real shame because Mayweather was using the $7 million in jewelry as a hedge against inflationary pressures brought on by the falling dollar and the continuing mortgage crisis. That or it was just sitting around in his house on the night of August 17th between 7 and 9 when it suddenly di...
Arms Race Gets Second and Larger Arm
Michael Bertin writes regularly about soccer for Deadspin Meet the new world power in soccer, the United Arab Emirates. Actually as people, they suck at the game. The national side is currently 104th (out of 208) in FIFA's World Rankings. But the Emirates have something more important than athletic ...
Just Don't Follow Him to Any Golden Clubs
You've got to give the kid credit: he does not shy away from insurmountable expectations. After following in his father's legendary footsteps at Georgetown, Patrick Ewing Jr., son of NBA Hall of Famer (scans NBA almanac) Patrick Ewing, is now a New York Knick. It's already Junior's third team, and h...
Aye Carumba! Chad Johnson Changes Last Name To Ocho Cinco
So Bengals wideout Chad Johnson has legally changed his name to "Chad Javon Ocho Cinco." Which I guess is only slightly better than "Chad Javon GoldenPalace.com." Chad expects to play in the Bengals' season opener, despite suffering a dislocated shoulder in the preseason and creating more needlework...
Gustav Evacuees Prompt LSU To Bump Kickoff Up To 11 AM ET
For those of you that thought our first college football Saturday couldn't start soon enough, you're in luck. That is, unless you live near the Gulf Coast, in which case you're probably running for your life from Hurricane Gustav. The Class 3 hurricane is expected to hit the Gulf Coast sometime Mon...
NFL Season Previews: Carolina Panthers
We're less than two weeks away from the start of the NFL season, so it's time to start the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous other walks of life whom consider football the only sport worth watching. Today: The Carolina Pan...
Bow Wow, The Game Wager $100k on Madden 09 Contest
No word on whether field goals are allowed. The loser's donating the money to charity. And by money I mean, part of the record company's marketing budget. Which then becomes a tax deduction. Bow Wow (nee Shad Moss), who will also be appearing in the upcoming season of Entourage (that's really unfor...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch following video proof that Germany won the 100m freestyle ... • MLB: Boston at New York Yankees (7 p.m., ET). Paul Byrd vs. Sidney Ponson in the race to a 5.00 ERA. [ESPN] • Tennis: U.S. Open, men's first round and women's second round, at New York (7 p.m., ET). Ow! I pulled my Kuznets...
Save the Three Daves of JP/LF/Raycom...Please, God, No
There's a movement afoot, led by esteemed Southern football writer Tony Barnhart, to save the three Daves from the college football scrap heap in the wake of the new ESPN deal with the SEC. This is the rough equivalent of calling for the Berlin Wall to be rebuilt on the morning after it was torn do...
They Must Be Coming By Sea
David Hirshey Michael Bertin writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer. Arsene Wenger would have made a good captain for the Titanic. That has less to do with any nautical skills that he may or may not have, than it does with hubris. This is an Arsenal side he has claimed in print has the ability ...
A Treed Blogger is a Dangerous Blogger (At Least Until the Batteries Run Out)
After we've finished a long day of blogging, we like to pour ourselves a tall Arnold Palmer (with enough whiskey to drown a horse) into a Thermos, pack the latest Uncle John's Bathroom Reader into a knapsack, and scurry up a tree for a relaxing afternoon. There, we find a perfect disconnect from the...
City Wins Big Despite Losing Richards, Deco Is the Difference For Chelsea
Manchester City's 3-0 drubbing of woeful West Ham was marred early in the second half when Micah Richards went down with a head injury after a midair collision with new teammate Tal Ben Haim. City's young star was treated by medical personnel on the pitch before being taken away on a stretcher. Aft...
Deadspin Interview: ESPNsoccernet's Lindsey Dolich
Lindsey Dolich has been documenting women's soccer for ESPNsoccernet and ESPN the Magazine in a freelance manner for about a year and has been the Ron Jaworski of these Olympics, breaking down each strategy and player in a highly detailed fashion that is instantly accessible to the casual soccer fa...
MLB Closer: Do Not Taunt Surly Third-Place Kitty
Zach Miner of Los Tigres Detroit committed regicide on the monarchs from Missouri, allowing only three singles in seven innings on the way to a 4-0 victory in Kansas City last night. How could he get away with such domination on a major league franchise while only striking out three? How could he kn...
NFL Closer: John McCain Taught Matt Leinart All He Knows About Football
Unless Steve Young took the wrong bridge out of San Francisco last night, there were no known professional-level quarterbacks in the city of Oakland, CA, last night. Normally, this would not be cause for concern, but an NFL preseason contest took place in Oakland Coliseum at the same time. (Arizona ...