ti Page 1639 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A Former Six Flags Employee Contributes To Our Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction
Consider this your daily link to Dave McKenna's "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," but here it is again for good measure. We'll post this until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit is dosed with a few micrograms of polonium-210. (For those of you keeping track, this is "We Are All Dave McKenna ...
Tiki Barber Finally Proposes To Young Blonde Blamed For Destroying His First Marriage
Since Tiki's attempts at joining an NFL team this season appear to have stalled, he's got more time to focus on other things in his life like finalizing his divorce from his wife Ginny and making an honest gal out of 24-year-old Traci Johnson, the former NBC intern who stole his heart two years ago....
Cedric Benson Will Spend His Bye Week In Jail
Last summer in Austin, Cedric Benson got into a bar fight that we'll rate 0.2 Jordan Jeffersons. He shoved some workers and threw a punch, and was arrested for misdemeanor assault. Today he paid the piper, pleading no contest and being sentenced to 20 days in jail....
Mets Fans Now Being Hunted Down Like Dogs, By Dogs
Flushing, as a neighborhood, has a decidedly unappealing name. But Citi Field isn't actually located in Flushing. Surrounded by a bay, two freeways and a park, the Mets share their parcel of land with the little-known, less-loved neighborhood of Willets Point. With a permanent population of one, Wil...
The Medical Board Says David Chao Is A Drunk. Former Patients Say He's A Quack. Why Is He An NFL Team Doctor?
The DEA says Dr. David Chao wrote himself illegal prescriptions more than a hundred times between 2008 and 2010. The California state medical board says he's an alcoholic and needs psychiatric help. Four former football players have sued Chao for malpractice, claiming he ended or shortened their car...
Nick Saban Was A Dick To Will Muschamp's Poor Mother
With college football—nay, SEC football— arriving this weekend, and without great expectations for the Gators, it's time for the Palm Beach Post to stoke our football interest by apprising us of blood feuds....
When Pole Vaulting Goes Wrong
In pole vaulting, the eponymous pole is designed to bend, not break. Sometimes it does both. At the IAAF World Championships in Daegu, South Korea, Russian pole vaulter Dmitry Starodubtsev was attempting 5.75 meters — roughly six inches off the eventual winning height — when his pole snapped like ...
Pete Rose Twitter Impostor Dupes Aaron Boone
If you don't believe that Twitter account @hit14king is actually Pete Rose, @hit14king defies you to "Call Aaron Boone and say what's up 513-226-7250 #reds #hatsoffcin #4192 its me people." ...
Here's Another NFL Preseason Photobomb
Say hi to Nick Mangold, who made a shot of Mark Sanchez getting interviewed all about him during the Jets/Bengals preseason game last Sunday. (H/T The Chive, via JayGlas12)...
This Week In Non-Hurricane Unintentional-Dong Picture Submissions
Just because one part of the country is getting rainy and windy and floody and scaredy and buy-y milky and bready becausey of hypey — translation: chock full of hurricane dong — the other unintentional-dong submissions should not lose their inherent import....
Bobby Valentine Has Left The People Of Stamford To Protect Themselves From Hurricane Irene
Bobby Valentine is public-safety director in the fine city of Stamford, Conn. Bobby Valentine is also an ESPN booth guy for MLB games. All of which is to say that Bobby Valentine will be commentating on the Angels/Rangers game in Arlington, Texas on Sunday night when Hurricane Irene stomps all over...
This Evening: "Get The Hell Off The Beach"
Your p.m. roundup for Aug. 26, the day we learned vodka and sugar can save flowers. Video via Hickey's favorite governor. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
"Let's Get This Clown Out Of Here": We Crashed ESPN's State Of The Union Address And Got Caught
Let's make one thing clear up top: Norby invited me. That would be Norby Williamson, ESPN's executive vice president of production. I have the email right here. Sent from [email protected] at 4:09 p.m. on Aug. 5. Subject line: "2011 'State of the Union' Talent Meeting - Sent on Behalf of Norby W...
Somebody Thought Luke Walton Would Make A Good "Big Men" Coach
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: two NBA Championships can't be wrong....
Hookers: A Deadspin Econometric Investigation
Reader "Steve Dildo" has alerted us to the client list of the "Desert Divas," an Arizona prostitution ring that was busted three years back. Mr. Dildo was most interested in the presence of a "Kevin Pitsoogle" on the list, but we've determined that this name is fake, unconnected to the similarly nam...
Bruce Pearl Hosts BBQ To Address NCAA Sanctions For BBQ He Once Hosted
On Wednesday, the NCAA announced that it would penalize former Tennessee men's basketball coach Bruce Pearl with a three-year show-cause penalty. The decision, which effectively shuts him out of a college coaching job for three years, is a result of infractions Pearl committed during his tenure at U...
Ravens Rookie Breaks Up Knife Fight At Five Guys Burgers, West Coasters Say In-N-Out Knife Fights Are Better
Tandon Doss is just a rookie, so he's still learning about Baltimore. His first lesson: the only two reasons to go to the Inner Harbor are the Aquarium and the chance to watch brawls at the many many chain restaurants (I saw a guy get shanked at the Cheesecake Factory once). Doss wasn't there for th...
Perhaps Bengals Fans Would Be Happier If They Were To Follow Carson Palmer's Lead
It's August 26, the day we keep hearing something about a hurricane that's apparently headed for New York City. Photo courtesy Trey, via @sportsfeeder1. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Derek Jeter And Minka Kelly Have Split, So Here's Your Chance, Dudes
Take that however you want to take it, single heterosexual male Yankees fans....
HOLY SHIT GIANT RAT IMPALED ON PITCHFORK
Let's stop worrying about earthquakes and hurricanes (and, for the east coast, natural disaster inferiority) and devote some time to the problem of the giant, possibly mutant rats living underneath our buildings....