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Presenting The London Olympic Mascots Photoshop Contest
The twin horrors of London 2012 are oh so exploitable. To that end, we're calling for your photoshopped submissions. Fabulous prizes abound!...

The Pittsburgh Ownership War Heats Up
Pirates owner Bob Nutting is still bitter over the Penguins' ownership group's attempt to buy the Bucs. When the Pirates fired back with a petty, "objective" column (on a team-run site) trashing the Pens for this season's failure, it ignited a firestorm....

Floyd Landis Admits To Blood Doping, Claims Lance Armstrong Did It Too
Despite years of denials, disgraced Tour de France winner Floyd Landis is spilling his guts about his career-long use of blood doping and performance-enhancing drugs—and claiming that Lance Armstrong taught him how to do it....

Calvin Murphy Fires Up The Delonte Got With LeBron's Mom Rumors Again
Hall-of-Famer Calvin Murphy appeared on ESPN Radio in Houston today and as all basketball conversations must do, the topic turned to the rumors about Delonte West's dalliance with LeBron James' mom. Murphy's response: "It ain't no rumor."...

Dead Wrestler Of The Week: Junkyard Dog
Every week, the Masked Man, Deadspin's pro wrestling correspondent, honors the sport's fallen and examines their legacies — famous and obscure alike. Today: Junkyard Dog, who died in a one-car accident in 1998....

Yes, The "N" In ESPN Looks Like Boba Fett
You can now impress every PTI-obsessed stormtrooper at the next sporty Star Wars gathering you attend. Those exist, right? [TheDailyWhat]...

Shouldn’t All Priests Be Castrated?
It's Tuesday. Let's look in the funbag and see what's inside. Oooh! Big League Chew! Man, do I love Big League Chew. It's like tobacco, but for children! Do I chew the entire pack all at once? FUCK AND YES, I do. Oh, and there are some letters in here. Let's read them....

Preakness Infield Exposé: I See The Blush Upon Thy Ass Cheeks, Maryland!
On Saturday, photographer Andrew Snow and writer Alan Siegel ventured among the bottoms and bottomless mugs of beer in the Preakness infield. Their report and a gallery, after the jump....

A Special Balls Deep Message To The Class Of 2010
It's graduation time across the country. I've done this post the past two years running, and I don't see new college grads getting any less annoying. So we'd best do it again....

ESPN Wins The Courtship Of Bill Simmons
Bill Simmons is close to re-upping with ESPN, people familiar with the situation say, putting an end to speculation that he might head for a competitor or strike out on his own when his contract expires at year's end....

Private Stache: LeBron Half-Naked In A Cornfield. We Are All Witnesses.
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....

The Condom Follies. GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Live Chat With Doug Glanville
Doug's down in the comments, for the next hour or so. Buy the book, ask him stuff, then buy the book again....

Cleveland Luminaries Join Forces To Win LeBron's Heart Through Terrible Song (CARL MONDAY UPDATE)
UPDATE: Yeah, that's Carl Monday at the 1:57 mark....

Is The Best Buy Geek Squad Stealing Your Donkey Porn?
No time to waste. My hand hurts a lot from talking with my kid while using a cow puppet yesterday. I used the puppet for, like, an hour. Now I have carpal tunnel. Lamest injury ever? Lamest injury ever. Fucking cow puppet. Right to the letters:...

Join Us For A Live Chat With Doug Glanville Tomorrow At 2pm EDT
The baseball player who was smarter than you is now an author who is smarter than you. Glanville will be here tomorrow to discuss his new book, "The Game From Where I Stand," as well as other germane topics....

An Illustrated Timeline Of The Maria Menounos "Shit Talking" Crisis
This morning, on ESPN's popular variety program First Take, TV personality Maria Menounos, speaking to Jay Crawford, said that she enjoyed live-Tweeting NBA games because she got to engage in "shit talking" with her followers. The Twitterverse went to DEFCON-2. A timeline....

Tim Donaghy's Bad Beat Of The Week: An Ice-Bucket Night In Miami
A weekly feature in which Tim Donaghy, the former NBA referee who spent 11 months in prison for relaying inside information to gamblers, tells us a sad gambling story. The standard caveats apply....

In Which We Get Sucked Into A Crazy Dog Show Feud
Remember the Dog Show? Little did I know when I posted this photo, I would open up the door to one man's insane quarrel with the pictured handler, and receive a letter that's ten kinds of nuts....
