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Let's Save Jesse Eisenberg's Career
It hasn't been a good week for Jesse Eisenberg. On Sunday, when the cameras caught him watching Team USA's gold medal win over Spain, the broadcasters thought he was actually Mark Zuckerberg. On Wednesday, he "contributed" an "essay" to Dave Eggers' "90 Days, 90 Reasons" site that couldn't have made...
Throwing Up Dip And Learning About Blowjobs: Deadspin's Notes On Summer Camp
I went to Camp Deerhorn in Rhinelander, Wis., every summer for the majority of my adolescence. It was an awesome camp. We got to fire guns. We got to shoot arrows. We got to go on horseback rides. (I’ve never shit my pants with more direct force than the first time I was on a horse and it went from ...
Taylor Grey Meyer, Who Kindly Told The Padres To "Suck Her Dick," Is Here To Answer Your Questions
Everyone, meet Taylor Grey Meyer. Taylor, meet everyone. Taylor is the overqualified, underemployed 31-year-old who applied 30 different times for various jobs with the Padres, getting rejected or ignored each time. When they tried to hit her up for $500 to attend a job fair, she snapped and fired o...
Catching <em>Phantom Of The Opera</em> With Vince McMahon: More Wrestler Run-Ins
Inspired by the saga of "Wrestling Superstar Virgil," we continue with readers' encounters with the titans of the squared circle. If you've had your own run-in with pro wrestlers past or present, e-mail us, subject line "Virgilbag."...
Why Your Team Sucks 2012: Baltimore Ravens
Some people are fans of the Baltimore Ravens. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Baltimore Ravens. This 2012 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read the other Why Your Team Sucks 2012 previews here....
For The Second Time In Three Weeks, ESPN Plagiarizes A Reporter's Work
In late July, ESPN got a well-deserved tsk-tsking from the Internet after a SportsCenter anchor delivered "breaking news" about Dwight Howard that was lifted, nearly verbatim, from a RealGM.com report. "This stuff happens from time to time," Vince Doria, ESPN's senior vice president and director o...
<em>SportsCenter</em> Spends The Day Celebrating Tim Tebow's Birthday [UPDATE]
It was Tim Tebow's 25th birthday today. Did you hear?...
The Circadian Advantage: How Sleep Patterns Benefit Certain NFL Teams
Imagine, for a second, that you are in a casino in Las Vegas. You have been in town for a few days, spent too much and slept too little, and recently found out the hard way that you are not as good at poker as you had thought. Now would be a good time to find a wager where the odds, like a tipsy bar...
Sippy Cups Can Go To Hell
I'm going to a wedding this weekend and I noticed that, as you grow older, you come full circle on weddings. The first time you go to a wedding in your 20s, you're like, "Oh cool, a wedding! FREE BOOZE AND SHIT!" But then everyone has that one summer where they have to go to eight weddings and by th...
Why Your Team Sucks 2012: Cincinnati Bengals
Some people are fans of the Cincinnati Bengals. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Cincinnati Bengals. This 2012 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read the other Why Your Team Sucks 2012 previews here....
Important: <em>This</em> Was The Worst Play In The History Of Baseball
I was encouraged to see Dan take such a bold stance in even entering the A.J. Pierzynski Groundout Debacle of 2012 as a contender for Worst Play in the History of Baseball™. However, there really is no debate when it comes to this. It was actually another former San Francisco Giant, Ruben Rivera, ...
Canada Is The New Uganda: Wrapping Up The Olympics With The Foreign News Bob Costas Plum Forgot About
Deadspin and Gelf Magazine brought you the best (or at least the most interesting) foreign-produced journalism about the London Olympics. ...
NBC Cut Nearly An Hour From Its Closing Ceremony Telecast. Here's Everything They Didn't Show You (Including The Kinks' Ray Davies)
We knew NBC would heavily edit its broadcast of last night's London Olympics closing ceremony; they cut out a bunch of stuff from the opening ceremony, too, in the name of "tailoring programming to our American audience." Last night presented an additional scheduling challenge for NBC, as they had ...
The Time Has Come For America's Flight Attendants To Shut Up
I think we can all agree that the emcee-ization of America's flight attendants has grown steadily worse over the past decade. And today, reader Kurt has sent us (and Gawker) arguably the nadir of flight attendant pep talks. I must warn you in advance that these will be among the two most painfully a...
Why Your Team Sucks 2012: New Orleans Saints
Some people are fans of the New Orleans Saints. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the New Orleans Saints. This 2012 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read the other Why Your Team Sucks 2012 previews here....
It Appears North Carolina Has Published Julius Peppers's Transcript For Some Reason
Little over a year ago the University of North Carolina threw one of its own on the altar of the NCAA, firing head football coach Butch Davis after the school was penalized for, among other things, improper benefits and academic violations. Having dispensed with Davis, the school sought to turn the...
![Report: Miami Dolphins Release Chad Johnson [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17vsemr8j4jlsjpg.jpg)
Report: Miami Dolphins Release Chad Johnson [UPDATE]
According to Jay Glazer, the Miami Dolphins have just released Chad Johnson following his arrest on charges of domestic violence. So much for all the drama on Hard Knocks. Looks like it'll be more of Ryan Tannehill's wife. ...
Your Sneak Preview Of The Closing Ceremony
The closing ceremonies kick off this afternoon at 4 p.m. EST. But why wait (*checks watch*) five minutes to see what the set'll look like? Hey, you could look at pictures of past closing ceremonies, or you could look at pictures of future closing ceremonies. Here are some pre-ceremony pictures being...
Mark Sanchez Confidence Report
As training camp continues, so does the most important quarterback controversy in the 6,000 year history of the world. We will haphazardly monitor the progress of the Mark Sanchez-Tim Tebow competition....
Your Daily Olympic Schedule: August 12 - Day 17
In effort to save you the time that it takes to both find and decipher the NBC Olympics schedule while trying to figure out which events are even worth watching, we've created our own (better) daily schedule of Olympic events. All events are listed in Eastern Daylight Time (no math) at the time tha...